Academically Deficient

Update on gifted ball player Willie McVie. Recently retired as publican at Larkhall's Royal Bar.

Yep. Cast iron vote winning machine for Scotland right there. Huzzah!

Quite, quite magnificent its eye-swivelling, moustache-twirling insanity. Reminds me of those desperate chancer mercenaries in the 70s who would round up barking mad ex-army types to go off and "save" some African country. 2 things tickled me most: "Leggy interns". Indeed, Sir!! Suits you, leggy interns is it, eh? Andrew Neil is the 2nd Greatest Living Scotsman!! Fucking mental!

I guess you guys made a big impression that day. Especially with Gregor Stevens' studs

I believe there is a feminist movement which produces and supports such material. I think it is a subscription type model or similar. Some guy told me about it.

Yes, part of their tough tackling defence of the mid to late 70s along with Jack Ripper, Reggie Kray and Boston Strangler. The physio was Harold Shipman.

Couple of years ago in Hamburg for, ahem, a wee break....anyway. the hotel had a pool and spa free to use, which given the tightwad tendencies of my pal who organises these trips, seemed luxurious. Down to the pool. Not in the water 2 minutes before an elderly, naked Frau started shouting at us in German and making the universal sign language for "get yer fucking trunks off. NOW!!". So we did. Cue much awkwardness. Then we started to relax and get used to it. Liberating right enough. Then, to the sauna. And a young frau bursts in and shouts at us to put our shorts ON!! Said something along the lines of "Nein poo poo". The Germans are remarkably relaxed about nudity, and hyper vigilant towards hygiene is my take on that. And very keen on rules.

I mind Rudyard Lanyard! Minor character in a long-running sitcom that was big in the 90s, but nobody watches anymore?

He even looks ready to take the photographer.

Here's your problem right there

Wow! I guess a fair number of those would have been interested neutrals like us (not really ) . Although I recall that there were so many St Mirren fans there that crowd where we were was fairly mixed. No trouble though, even as the lads from Paisley let their views be known on the home team's rather physical approach. "Dirty b*****ds" for example.

"Got a harpoon in the boot of my car"

They were a very good team. Is that the season they won promotion? They drew Motherwell in the Scottish Cup and there was huge hype about that game. I went with my Dad to Fir Park to watch it, cos he'd heard so much about how good St Mirren were, the crowd was big (maybe close to 20,000) and there was a great atmosphere. Motherwell were brutal and kicked St Mirren black and blue. Craig Brown was Motherwell assistant at the time I think, and was on the radio recently, chuckling away at his memory of his pre-match instructions which were, in essence, "make sure you kick them black and blue". Any Saints fans have similar memories of this game? Motherwell fans probably recall it as a typically robust performance and routine victory from their 70s team

Move into Krugerrands, lads. They're the future.

I bought the Boss br 800 which is a home recording unit with inbuilt drum kits and patterns that can be easily edited, which even I can manage to work. Inbuilt guitar sounds, Amps, effects etc. Its really good and costs about £350. It even has a bass and acoustic guitar simulator, so in theory you only need 1 guitar, a lead and a plectrum to make a record.

I seem to remember Ringo Starr was left handed but played a right handed set up, hence his distinctive style. Things didn't turn out too bad for him. Keep rockin' - that's the main thing

0-0 or narrow St. Mirren win. Accies red card (Martin).

Yes, that's the one. Well remembered

I believe in organisational management theory this is known as the David Templeton Effect (see the seminal text by Fufkin & Loophole, 1973).

To be fair Jeff, they ain't got enough depf in their squad. I mean, look at the bench they got. Nuffink there, not enough quality. And this new bloke wot they brung in.....I dunno, Jeff. I fink next season they goin' dahn.

Ouch!! I've been called many things in my time etc etc... Especially since Glaswegians are so well-behaved and abstemious when they venture forth.

Got her arse handed to her at today's FMQs. More please.

There was a famous Scottish advert in the 70s from the Health Board or similar which highlighted exactly that. Guy is in the pub at ten to three with his pals. They go to the game and he stays for another drink. The slogan was "Missed the game again" or similar. Very judgemental. We've all done it.

Ah, another connisseur! Your good health, Sir!