Academically Deficient

It wasn't all bad. My first Scotland games were in the oddly-named Schoolboys Enclosure. The dads in there would enjoy Croft Original or Lanliq instead of lager. Then drive home. Oh, ok...I see it now.

Not to mention the rivers of urine flowing down the steps. Old Hampden was a scary place. You climbed up the steps to get out, being jostled all the way, squeezed through the apertures at the top, then steps going down to street level. Sounds ok, but when your feet aren't in contact with the ground it's not so good.

Machine Gun Etiquette is the best lp by The Damned. More of a "who gives a f**k ya auld dafty" rather than unpopular opinion. But I feel better for saying it

As someone said recently about the likelihood of this happening: each team is only as safe as their thickest member (ooh err etc.) Looks like Celtic have found their Robbie Savage.

Happy Birthday

I always get a massive hard on for the ginger from Girls Aloud.

Well done for realising this and doing something about it. I've always thought that a lot more people should realise this about themselves. I was always your typical happy then sleepy drunk until a succession of bereavements a few years ago. Then it all changed and I've realized I need to be much more careful. I'm ok not having a drink, or having a session, I just envy those people who can genuinely have "just the one".

There's been a Girls Aloud Appreciation Thread in my own mind for the best part of 20 years. I also really like the way they looked.

Excellent idea. But It will still be damned Johnny Foreigner to blame, with his intransigence. Dont-you-know-who-I-am is always such a winning approach to take with people you need a favour from.

You guys are over-thinking this. Have you noticed who you are playing?

Merci, Monsieur. C'est bon.

Several pro-Brexit commentators are currently demanding an agreement with France to prevent asylum seekers setting off in dinghys in the channel. Like with the EHIC card, I fail to see what possible motivation there is for the EU to accommodate it. What is "go and take a flying f**k to yourself" in French?

Even teams which are over 50 years dead have got a better European pedigree than The Accies. Puts the tin lid on knowing Annan are going to pump us out the League Cup again.

Oh ffs. It's Annan! If they win again they get to keep us On the upside, a potential day out in Ayr. Come on, Accies. Please take it seriously this time.

The Bully Wee did play in Europe after all then, cos I'm counting that as official. My list of Scottish teams that have never played in Europe (which obviously includes Accies) has just been reduced by 1. The French are great at inventing tournaments aren't they? Could they maybe come up with an invitational cup for teams whose grounds are overlooked by at least 2 major food retailers?

I usually work out roughly even over a season. Maybe slightly up or down. I have rules I stick to. Only bet on football, no more than 4 games per accumulator. The only stupid bets I make are after 4 pre-match pints if Scotland are playing. Even then it's nothing major. Having said all that, the bookies I go to in Govan is so depressing that I haven't placed on a game for ages.

In fairness everyone know this anyway, except for a few desperate yoons In Scotland maybe. But this was a Radio 4 item, and would have been an eye-opener for people elsewhere I think. One question it addressed was who makes the pro-union case and what its argument would be. No convincing answer was forthcoming beyond borders/currency, which it was accepted is only regarded as a negative if you're already pro-union.

Yes, Scottish Gaelic. You might think the lovely sound of the language would take a slight edge off the disappointment of having a home defeat described. It doesn't.

I listened to this being discussed on "The Briefing Room" on BBC last night, hosted by David Aaranovich, guests included Prof. John Curtice. In summary, like NI, its demographics and Brexit that will do for the Union. It will be impossible for a pro Union campaign to convince people that the status quo is the only low-risk option next time. Interesting that the subject has previously been treated on this show as an interesting, abstract question for political geeks, with little chance of independence happening. Last night there seemed to an almost resigned air that a referendum was coming, and the Union was in big trouble.

Is your team still massive? I mean physically, height-wise? Accies like to field a team of 5th year pupils and subbuteo players so it should make for an interesting (pundit cliche alarm) clash of styles.

Well that's my earworm for the day sorted. "Lip Up Fatty" on a loop till bedtime

She looks, and sounds, amazing. No sign of the generic plastic surgery. Which leads me to the horrifying conclusion that it's all down to healthy living. If she had moved to Lanarkshire to be with me that wouldn't have been an option.

An intriguing thought. Old Tony would've ended up leaving more than just his heart in San Francisco.

Unhinged, but I kinda dig it, baby. The groovy band is, like, way low in the mix though.