Sergeant Wilson Posted October 31, 2011 Share Posted October 31, 2011 2. If you've a friend who fancies her, have him standing by with a shoulder to cry on and ready to supply a sympathy fcuk. Not only will it take the edge off her pain, but it'll spread the guilt around too. Me, me, me, me. I know the way. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest The Phoenix Posted October 31, 2011 Share Posted October 31, 2011 Me, me, me, me. I know the way. To Amarillo? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zen Archer (Raconteur) Posted October 31, 2011 Share Posted October 31, 2011 I'm not entirely sure what I was expecting in reply when I posted that, but i probably should have seen something like this coming . edit: faking my death is the current frontrunner Just think of it as revenge, seeing as she's been faking it for yonks. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gordon EF Posted October 31, 2011 Share Posted October 31, 2011 Anyone got any tips for breaking up with your girlfriend? Ive decided to do it but when I've been the one doing the breaking up ive only ever done it by text, and im determined not to be such a douchebag this time. You must have a reason for wanting to dump her. You could always just tell her you need to talk to her and then explain to her what the reason is. Call me crazy but I think it just might work. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paco Posted October 31, 2011 Share Posted October 31, 2011 Move to Yemen. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael W Posted October 31, 2011 Share Posted October 31, 2011 Anyone got any tips for breaking up with your girlfriend? Ive decided to do it but when I've been the one doing the breaking up ive only ever done it by text, and im determined not to be such a douchebag this time. Just tell her how you feel. You'll probably feel like a c**t when/if she cries, but it's a less dickish way of doing it than by text. Failing that, shag her best mate and let her do the dirty work. And by that, I mean breaking up. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cowden til i die Posted October 31, 2011 Share Posted October 31, 2011 Move to Yemen. I've for a place he can rent, the address is 15 Yemen Road, Yemen. Pm me if interested. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sergeant Wilson Posted October 31, 2011 Share Posted October 31, 2011 You must have a reason for wanting to dump her. You could always just tell her you need to talk to her and then explain to her what the reason is. Call me crazy but I think it just might work. We can do without your sort here. Anyway, Show her mum and dad the elephant trick with your trouser pockets. If either is dead say how much you'd like to have shown them. Your feet won't touch the floor.....and no guilt. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dave258 Posted October 31, 2011 Share Posted October 31, 2011 I stand by my earlier statement. He's still not told us if she's a growler or not either... 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
vikingTON Posted October 31, 2011 Share Posted October 31, 2011 Kick her in the pie. -1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jimmy85 Posted October 31, 2011 Share Posted October 31, 2011 Just kill her. That way there's no reason to feel guilty. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
joe pineapples Posted October 31, 2011 Share Posted October 31, 2011 Anyone got any tips for breaking up with your girlfriend? Ive decided to do it but when I've been the one doing the breaking up ive only ever done it by text, and im determined not to be such a douchebag this time. Is her maw half decent? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wunfellaff Posted October 31, 2011 Share Posted October 31, 2011 Anyone got any tips for breaking up with your girlfriend? Ive decided to do it but when I've been the one doing the breaking up ive only ever done it by text, and im determined not to be such a douchebag this time. You have always came across as slightly camp on here so play on that. Arrange to have one of your mates pump you when she is due to come round. Better than you pumping him as she might not take the hint and just offer you surm burm lurve if she only thinks you are a 'giver'. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
joe pineapples Posted October 31, 2011 Share Posted October 31, 2011 You have always came across as slightly camp on here so play on that. Arrange to have one of your mates pump you when she is due to come round. Better than you pumping him as she might not take the hint and just offer you surm burm lurve if she only thinks you are a 'giver'. is this good advice? She might buy a strap on once she knows he takes it. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wunfellaff Posted October 31, 2011 Share Posted October 31, 2011 is this good advice? She might buy a strap on once she knows he takes it. Then problem solved, he would have no need to dump her 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dazzle Posted October 31, 2011 Share Posted October 31, 2011 Anyone got any tips for breaking up with your girlfriend? Ive decided to do it but when I've been the one doing the breaking up ive only ever done it by text, and im determined not to be such a douchebag this time. Get with another bird, I didnt even have to dump her after that. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bullywee Posted October 31, 2011 Share Posted October 31, 2011 (edited) leave your contagious penis cancer medicine prescription somewhere where she'll definitely see it. Edited October 31, 2011 by bullywee 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chimp Posted October 31, 2011 Share Posted October 31, 2011 Tell her yer Vagina really doesn't suit your willy. Tell her that sex you both have shared has let you down. Tell her she was lucky to stuck around with her selfish attitude and tell her woman needs the boaby and she would be very greatful for what she has received. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Parscelona Posted October 31, 2011 Share Posted October 31, 2011 Make sure that you're wearing a protective cup. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Donnyarb Posted October 31, 2011 Share Posted October 31, 2011 I'll take her off your hands. -2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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