Zen Archer (Raconteur) Posted September 22, 2016 Share Posted September 22, 2016 2 hours ago, Black and White Tragic said: Breakfast, proper eggs with soldiers. That was before Edwina Currie ruined it for a generation. I knew she fucked a major but the rest of the army as well? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bert Raccoon Posted September 22, 2016 Share Posted September 22, 2016 1 hour ago, Bobby Skidmarks said: Is that the view from your bin? Imagine waking up from a night on the turps, open the lid of your bin and there's a massive duck about to aquack. Doesn't bear thinking about. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Black and White Tragic Posted September 23, 2016 Share Posted September 23, 2016 Living like "a beast" gets you an alternative Nobel prize and $10 trillion dollars. Who knew?Man who lived like a badger in a Welsh hole gets spoof Nobel prize http://news.sky.com/story/man-who-lived-like-a-badger-in-a-welsh-hole-gets-spoof-nobel-prize-10589065 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shandon Par Posted September 23, 2016 Share Posted September 23, 2016 8 hours ago, Njord said: My new pal at work is Duckzilla. This is what happens when you handfeed beef Monster Munch and coffee to a Mallard.... Anyone who handed me Beef Monster munch and a coffee would be my friend for life. Also, quick P&B tip.. Bacon Fries (or inferior Frazzles) dipped in espresso is a delicacy. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dosser-fae-the-shire Posted September 23, 2016 Share Posted September 23, 2016 Anyone who handed me Beef Monster munch and a coffee would be my friend for life. Also, quick P&B tip.. Bacon Fries (or inferior Frazzles) dipped in espresso is a delicacy. That sounds fuckin mingin. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shandon Par Posted September 23, 2016 Share Posted September 23, 2016 25 minutes ago, Dosser-fae-the-shire said: That sounds fuckin mingin. I was teetotal for a few years so had to get creative in pubs. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dosser-fae-the-shire Posted September 23, 2016 Share Posted September 23, 2016 What on earth drove you to these levels of despair? Think you missed the part where he mentioned being teetotal. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hedgecutter Posted September 23, 2016 Share Posted September 23, 2016 Got an email to my Gmail account saying my Yahoo account has possibly been hacked seeing as somebody stole the details of 500 million users. http://money.cnn.com/2016/09/22/technology/yahoo-data-breach/index.html?sr=twCNN092216yahoo-data-breach0700PMVODtopLink&linkId=29092163Can't actually remember having a Yahoo account tbh, but seemed to know my name and alternative email. Dang. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shandon Par Posted September 23, 2016 Share Posted September 23, 2016 24 minutes ago, throbber said: It was becoming teetotal I was meaning - that would be shit. Also if you're going to be teetotal then who would want to spend time in a pub anyway? Good point. I'm a month and a bit into being teetotal again. Go for pub lunches still but not been to pub at night time. I've become a fitness freak instead. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sergeant Wilson Posted September 23, 2016 Share Posted September 23, 2016 29 minutes ago, throbber said: It was becoming teetotal I was meaning - that would be shit. Also if you're going to be teetotal then who would want to spend time in a pub anyway? As Alfred Garnett said "I feel sorry for people that don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's the best they'll feel all day". 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joey Jo Jo Junior Shabadoo Posted September 23, 2016 Share Posted September 23, 2016 The Dundee Evening Telegraph just popped up on my Facebook: It wasn't the only thing that popped up, by the looks of things. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shandon Par Posted September 24, 2016 Share Posted September 24, 2016 8 hours ago, Joey Jo Jo Junior Shabadoo said: The Dundee Evening Telegraph just popped up on my Facebook: It wasn't the only thing that popped up, by the looks of things. Dan decides to show Ron Jeremy how it's done. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sweaty Morph Posted September 24, 2016 Share Posted September 24, 2016 The Dundee Evening Telegraph just popped up on my Facebook: It wasn't the only thing that popped up, by the looks of things. Clearly enjoying the double Dees in front of him. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shandon Par Posted September 24, 2016 Share Posted September 24, 2016 I think my (i)phone has a low opinion of me. If I stop the car and go into a shop, for example, it brings up a message to tell me where I parked the car. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grim O'Grady Posted September 24, 2016 Share Posted September 24, 2016 5 minutes ago, Shandon Par said: I think my (i)phone has a low opinion of me. If I stop the car and go into a shop, for example, it brings up a message to tell me where I parked the car. It's not alone Shands. Grimbo -1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shandon Par Posted September 24, 2016 Share Posted September 24, 2016 5 minutes ago, Grim O'Grady said: It's not alone Shands. Grimbo I was just going to the supermarket and it suggested I go to my boxing gym instead and brought up a map of how to get there. Due an upgrade soon so instead of trading it in I'm going to smash the cheeky little b*****d up with a hammer. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grim O'Grady Posted September 24, 2016 Share Posted September 24, 2016 1 minute ago, Shandon Par said: I was just going to the supermarket and it suggested I go to my boxing gym instead and brought up a map of how to get there. Due an upgrade soon so instead of trading it in I'm going to smash the cheeky little b*****d up with a hammer. Tell it you are taking it to the sparkling phone shop for a new dress or whatever you like to cover your phone in but take it to the boxing gym & give it a swift jab in the ring. Show the gobby mouthpiece who the smart one is? Grimbo -1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shandon Par Posted September 24, 2016 Share Posted September 24, 2016 1 minute ago, Grim O'Grady said: Show the gobby mouthpiece who the smart one is? Grimbo Sadly there would only be one winner. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grim O'Grady Posted September 24, 2016 Share Posted September 24, 2016 7 minutes ago, Shandon Par said: Sadly there would only be one winner. Hey chin up mate, there's bound to be a thread on here to cover every eventuality, you can be assured we've got your back & will rip the pish out of you for a wee while, you know how quickly things pass by round here? I bet you could beat it at squash, well over a best of 3 maybe? Have a good weekend pal & ignore that phone even if doing so you end up in the cells again. Grimbo -1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shandon Par Posted September 24, 2016 Share Posted September 24, 2016 6 minutes ago, Grim O'Grady said: Hey chin up mate, there's bound to be a thread on here to cover every eventuality, you can be assured we've got your back & will rip the pish out of you for a wee while, you know how quickly things pass by round here? I bet you could beat it at squash, well over a best of 3 maybe? Have a good weekend pal & ignore that phone even if doing so you end up in the cells again. Grimbo It fat shamed me into going to the gym (the kind with bad music and machines etc). I think I picked up some tropical disease yesterday and should be in my bed but I'm being bossed about by some HAL wannabe. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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