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Just keep going with the coffee. You sound like you're at the stage where another six or seven cups could elevate you into a kinda shamanic state. I do it sometimes if I've a heavy workload and if you neck an insane amount of coffee, and then have loads more, you go into a trippy, euphoric state.

either the shower I just had was too hot or I'm going cold turkey. Itching. I'm away to get back on the coffee FTW.

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Just had to cancel a meeting as I twigged I had encountered the person before many years ago...

Think I posted something about this years ago but never mind.

This was almost 10 years ago!

I was sceptical but on a dry spell so I signed up for POF and was pretty quickly messaged by a girl. Reasonably pretty face, only head shots and being a newbie to POF I didn't think anything of this. She'd put her body shape down as 'average' and people don't lie on the internet. She sounded a bit thick and was clearly a massive attention seeker but I was pretty desperate.

So after exchanging messages we arrange a date, just a drink in the village she lives in a few miles from mine. I park up outside her house and am fiddling with the radio to make sure a suitably suave track is on when she gets in.

Something strange happens, all of a sudden my rearview mirror is engulfed in darkness and I'm sure there was nothing on the news about an eclipse. On closer inspection a behemoth is wobbling towards my car, as it gets closer I feel like Sam Neill in Jurassic Park, if there was a glass of water on the dash it wouldn't be rippling it would be making a run for it. It appears she lied, the only way she would be of average size is if she had Eddie Stobart painted on her stomach.

She gets in, the car visibly lowers. Not only am I out in public with this mess it's playing havoc with my fuel efficiency. As we park up outside the pub following an awkward drive. I notice the tattoo on her back (she has some god awful ones on her arms as well). It's a complete scene from South Park, featuring all of your favourite characters across the width of her bovine-like back.

As we approach the pub I decide I can't go through with it. She gets in the door and I say I left my wallet in the car and for her to order the drinks and I'll pay when I get back. Obviously I then make a dash for it. Despite the horror of the last few minutes it turns into a decent night, pick up a dominos and home in time for a Champions League game. She phoned several times I presume to find out what happened, then the texts started. 13 in the next 12 hours followed by a foul-mouthed tirade on POF with various threats that I'd get killed if her friends ever see me. Account Deleted.

So yeah, I cancelled the meeting....

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Just had to cancel a meeting as I twigged I had encountered the person before many years ago...

Think I posted something about this years ago but never mind.

This was almost 10 years ago!

I was sceptical but on a dry spell so I signed up for POF and was pretty quickly messaged by a girl. Reasonably pretty face, only head shots and being a newbie to POF I didn't think anything of this. She'd put her body shape down as 'average' and people don't lie on the internet. She sounded a bit thick and was clearly a massive attention seeker but I was pretty desperate.

So after exchanging messages we arrange a date, just a drink in the village she lives in a few miles from mine. I park up outside her house and am fiddling with the radio to make sure a suitably suave track is on when she gets in.

Something strange happens, all of a sudden my rearview mirror is engulfed in darkness and I'm sure there was nothing on the news about an eclipse. On closer inspection a behemoth is wobbling towards my car, as it gets closer I feel like Sam Neill in Jurassic Park, if there was a glass of water on the dash it wouldn't be rippling it would be making a run for it. It appears she lied, the only way she would be of average size is if she had Eddie Stobart painted on her stomach.

She gets in, the car visibly lowers. Not only am I out in public with this mess it's playing havoc with my fuel efficiency. As we park up outside the pub following an awkward drive. I notice the tattoo on her back (she has some god awful ones on her arms as well). It's a complete scene from South Park, featuring all of your favourite characters across the width of her bovine-like back.

As we approach the pub I decide I can't go through with it. She gets in the door and I say I left my wallet in the car and for her to order the drinks and I'll pay when I get back. Obviously I then make a dash for it. Despite the horror of the last few minutes it turns into a decent night, pick up a dominos and home in time for a Champions League game. She phoned several times I presume to find out what happened, then the texts started. 13 in the next 12 hours followed by a foul-mouthed tirade on POF with various threats that I'd get killed if her friends ever see me. Account Deleted.

So yeah, I cancelled the meeting....

Pretty much how I imagine it

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Just had to cancel a meeting as I twigged I had encountered the person before many years ago...

Think I posted something about this years ago but never mind.

This was almost 10 years ago!

I was sceptical but on a dry spell so I signed up for POF and was pretty quickly messaged by a girl. Reasonably pretty face, only head shots and being a newbie to POF I didn't think anything of this. She'd put her body shape down as 'average' and people don't lie on the internet. She sounded a bit thick and was clearly a massive attention seeker but I was pretty desperate.

So after exchanging messages we arrange a date, just a drink in the village she lives in a few miles from mine. I park up outside her house and am fiddling with the radio to make sure a suitably suave track is on when she gets in.

Something strange happens, all of a sudden my rearview mirror is engulfed in darkness and I'm sure there was nothing on the news about an eclipse. On closer inspection a behemoth is wobbling towards my car, as it gets closer I feel like Sam Neill in Jurassic Park, if there was a glass of water on the dash it wouldn't be rippling it would be making a run for it. It appears she lied, the only way she would be of average size is if she had Eddie Stobart painted on her stomach.

She gets in, the car visibly lowers. Not only am I out in public with this mess it's playing havoc with my fuel efficiency. As we park up outside the pub following an awkward drive. I notice the tattoo on her back (she has some god awful ones on her arms as well). It's a complete scene from South Park, featuring all of your favourite characters across the width of her bovine-like back.

As we approach the pub I decide I can't go through with it. She gets in the door and I say I left my wallet in the car and for her to order the drinks and I'll pay when I get back. Obviously I then make a dash for it. Despite the horror of the last few minutes it turns into a decent night, pick up a dominos and home in time for a Champions League game. She phoned several times I presume to find out what happened, then the texts started. 13 in the next 12 hours followed by a foul-mouthed tirade on POF with various threats that I'd get killed if her friends ever see me. Account Deleted.

So yeah, I cancelled the meeting....

:lol: well played, fat people are disgusting.

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Just had to cancel a meeting as I twigged I had encountered the person before many years ago...

Think I posted something about this years ago but never mind.

This was almost 10 years ago!

I was sceptical but on a dry spell so I signed up for POF and was pretty quickly messaged by a girl. Reasonably pretty face, only head shots and being a newbie to POF I didn't think anything of this. She'd put her body shape down as 'average' and people don't lie on the internet. She sounded a bit thick and was clearly a massive attention seeker but I was pretty desperate.

So after exchanging messages we arrange a date, just a drink in the village she lives in a few miles from mine. I park up outside her house and am fiddling with the radio to make sure a suitably suave track is on when she gets in.

Something strange happens, all of a sudden my rearview mirror is engulfed in darkness and I'm sure there was nothing on the news about an eclipse. On closer inspection a behemoth is wobbling towards my car, as it gets closer I feel like Sam Neill in Jurassic Park, if there was a glass of water on the dash it wouldn't be rippling it would be making a run for it. It appears she lied, the only way she would be of average size is if she had Eddie Stobart painted on her stomach.

She gets in, the car visibly lowers. Not only am I out in public with this mess it's playing havoc with my fuel efficiency. As we park up outside the pub following an awkward drive. I notice the tattoo on her back (she has some god awful ones on her arms as well). It's a complete scene from South Park, featuring all of your favourite characters across the width of her bovine-like back.

As we approach the pub I decide I can't go through with it. She gets in the door and I say I left my wallet in the car and for her to order the drinks and I'll pay when I get back. Obviously I then make a dash for it. Despite the horror of the last few minutes it turns into a decent night, pick up a dominos and home in time for a Champions League game. She phoned several times I presume to find out what happened, then the texts started. 13 in the next 12 hours followed by a foul-mouthed tirade on POF with various threats that I'd get killed if her friends ever see me. Account Deleted.

So yeah, I cancelled the meeting....

^^^

Quite clearly pumped her up against the bins round the back of the pub whilst crying his eyes out type post imo.

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I've had very, very little sleep from yesterday. I should be asleep now but I had a coffee at 4 to keep me up until about now, so I'd sleep right up until late shift today.

I'm fucking buzzing.

I've had really shite sleep the last few nights. Today, for the first time, I'm working in the Starbucks franchise in my work. I'm in two minds whether to just get fucked on coffee for the next two days or play it safe and be tired all of today, but hopefully got a decent nights kip tonight.

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Yet still infinitely more believable than anything you've ever posted :lol:

I don't really know (& don't care tbh) what 8Mile did to piss you off so much but boy it must have been good to still have you so fuckin enraged you have to quote all his posts with catty replies...
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Careful, he's luring you in, next thing you know you'll be getting dragged from the boot of a car and bundled into a strange house and forced to install a kitchen.

Mind I've got beer though ;)

ETA I also have some fine single malt here....

***I might need my mains water supply moved slightly and stopcock replaced***

Edited by RoversMad
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I've spoken all of 13 words today

I'm willing to bet at least twelve of them couldn't be repeated on a family-friendly football forum.

And the other one was 'philpy'.

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How long should you stir-fry diced chicken? I thought that 20 minutes would be more than enough and began to eat it after it was lightly browned on the outside. Then I noticed a little pink line inside one of the pieces of chicken. I'm now feeling very paranoid and anxious.

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How long should you stir-fry diced chicken? I thought that 20 minutes would be more than enough and began to eat it after it was lightly browned on the outside. Then I noticed a little pink line inside one of the pieces of chicken. I'm now feeling very paranoid and anxious.

20 minutes and it was still pink? What did you stir fry it over? A match?

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How long should you stir-fry diced chicken? I thought that 20 minutes would be more than enough and began to eat it after it was lightly browned on the outside. Then I noticed a little pink line inside one of the pieces of chicken. I'm now feeling very paranoid and anxious.

Usually around 8-10mins for me (constant turning on med-high heat). Anything longer tends to make it stringy and chewy. Longer if you're cooking it in any sauces of course, but I prefer cooking the chicken first before adding to a sauce to simmer in.

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