welshbairn Posted November 6, 2014 Share Posted November 6, 2014 (edited) It doesn't really make sense does it? It's not practical advice, it's just a bunch of sexual metaphors. I like this one: PROTECT YOUR OWN HEART. Just as you committed to being the protector of her heart, you must guard your own with the same vigilance. Love yourself fully, love the world openly, but there is a special place in your heart where no one must enter except for your wife. Keep that space always ready to receive her and invite her in, and refuse to let anyone or anything else enter there. Presumably it means you can shag anything that bleeds but only let HER stick her thumb up your arse when you're coming. Edited November 6, 2014 by welshbairn 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tamdunk Posted November 8, 2014 Share Posted November 8, 2014 I'm huge fan of leaving shopping trolleys against shit parkers cars. The seethe it causes is immense. Point proved. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zen Archer (Raconteur) Posted November 9, 2014 Share Posted November 9, 2014 ^^^top of his Santa list: Blow Up Monty the Penguin. I am told this can be purchased at Anne Summers. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mark Connolly Posted November 9, 2014 Share Posted November 9, 2014 People checking in at churches for Remembrance Day services 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zetterlund Posted November 9, 2014 Share Posted November 9, 2014 People checking in at churches for Remembrance Day services F**king hell 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mizfit Posted November 9, 2014 Share Posted November 9, 2014 People changing their profile pictures to poppies. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hammer Jag Posted November 9, 2014 Share Posted November 9, 2014 "We will remember them" ** ** Actually no, we'll spend the day on Facebook, using Remembrance Sunday as the perfect excuse for attention seeking and as an excuse to police people for wearing/not wearing poppies, with lashings of mock outrage. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shotgun Posted November 10, 2014 Share Posted November 10, 2014 http://www.answers.com/article/1236152/10-celebs-you-didnt-know-are-virgins?paramt=null¶m4=fb-gb-de-entertainment¶m1=people¶m2=14734761¶m5=10152433883286186¶m6=14996391 mmmmmmmmmmmmmmm Uh huh. https://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20130227051036AAgx5Gq 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shotgun Posted November 10, 2014 Share Posted November 10, 2014 A lot of people stretching credibility to give themselves a tie-in to the Berlin Wall coming down. "I sat and watched this on television with friends" etc. My favourite so far has been "I was in France that year. What an amazing time to be there!" Yes, France. Oh, and not even "while it happened" but "that year". Makes me think of Pie and Bovril's standard disaster response "I was there last week. Could have been me". 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bobby Skidmarks Posted November 11, 2014 Share Posted November 11, 2014 Furthermore it is actually possible to get a woman pregnant by ejaculating in her presence and the seman can still find a way in. Its how i became an uncle at 17 I think your sisters presence might have been felt more times than a Jedis, throbber. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
forever_blue Posted November 11, 2014 Share Posted November 11, 2014 A lot of people stretching credibility to give themselves a tie-in to the Berlin Wall coming down. "I sat and watched this on television with friends" etc. My favourite so far has been "I was in France that year. What an amazing time to be there!" Yes, France. Oh, and not even "while it happened" but "that year". Makes me think of Pie and Bovril's standard disaster response "I was there last week. Could have been me". i wasnt even born , what a time to not be alive 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Estragon Posted November 11, 2014 Share Posted November 11, 2014 #lestweforget.... Possibly the most cringeably inappropriate hashtag we've seen since the infamous #4funeralsin2weeks... 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bully Wee Villa Posted November 11, 2014 Share Posted November 11, 2014 I'm always forgetting that the First World War happened. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shotgun Posted November 11, 2014 Share Posted November 11, 2014 #lestweforget.... Possibly the most cringeably inappropriate hashtag we've seen since the infamous #4funeralsin2weeks... And what does it mean exactly? The next time a politician sends the troops to war on a ridiculously flimsy premise, will we "remember" what happened before and take to the streets in protest? Or will we wave the flag and bang the drum and get all teary eyed as we wax lyrical about "our brave boys - heroes all!" What is it we shouldn't forget? Got someone on mine wishing everyone a "Happy Veterans Day". Apparently she forgot that today was never intended to be a "happy" day. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DA Baracus Posted November 11, 2014 Share Posted November 11, 2014 Not only that but we seemingly only 'remember' for a select few days a year, ironically 'forgetting' for the vast, vast majority of the time. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boghead ranter Posted November 11, 2014 Share Posted November 11, 2014 https://www.facebook.com/SharingissCaring?fref=nf FFS. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
forever_blue Posted November 12, 2014 Share Posted November 12, 2014 lassie from my class whn I was in school who is still into horse riding and all that I lolled 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
houston_bud Posted November 12, 2014 Share Posted November 12, 2014 A girl I used to work with always wanted to be an actress in musicals or something. To be fair I heard her sing once and she was very good. However she recently posted this on facebook; "Today I have said goodbye to one part of my life. However as the world works in weird, wonderful and mysterious ways, I have also today said hello to a new chapter in my life. I chased my reality not my dream as dreams rarely exist.... I am looking forward to my new and positive start, as of Tuesday I am Supervisor of Womenswear and Lingerie at Debenhams , I am so proud I have been given this opportunity" 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Silvio Posted November 12, 2014 Share Posted November 12, 2014 Some c**t on mine has just checked in at the local hospital with their child. No other information. Cue loads of 'hope all is ok babe xxx' type posts. f**k off 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
forever_blue Posted November 12, 2014 Share Posted November 12, 2014 Some c**t on mine has just checked in at the local hospital with their child. No other information. Cue loads of 'hope all is ok babe xxx' type posts. f**k off this stuff is the worst attention seeking pish on facebook , i have had people checking in at churches for funerals before. fucking cretins of the highest order 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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