jagfox Posted August 17, 2018 Share Posted August 17, 2018 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bold Rover Posted August 17, 2018 Share Posted August 17, 2018 38 minutes ago, jagfox99 said: I did, however, immediately notice the ugly "z" where an "s" should be. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GordonD Posted August 19, 2018 Share Posted August 19, 2018 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jdog Posted August 19, 2018 Share Posted August 19, 2018 https://twitter.com/i/status/1030770651773247488 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jagfox Posted August 20, 2018 Share Posted August 20, 2018 My uncle Billy was a shite ventriloquist... He used to sit me on his knee, shove his finger up my arse and tell me to say nothing... 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bishopburn boy Posted August 21, 2018 Share Posted August 21, 2018 First rule of w**k club don’t shake hands with other members of w**k club 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
buchan30 Posted August 22, 2018 Share Posted August 22, 2018 I just asked siri “Surely it won’t rain today”?She said “it will, and don’t call me shirley”...forgot to take my phone off airplane mode. 17 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Master Posted August 23, 2018 Share Posted August 23, 2018 To the person who stole my copy of Microsoft Office - I will hunt you down and take it back. You have my Word. 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tamthebam Posted August 23, 2018 Share Posted August 23, 2018 My mate was shot by a starting pistol. Police suspect it's race related... 15 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jagfox Posted August 25, 2018 Share Posted August 25, 2018 I was wondering what my parents did to fight boredom before the internet. I asked my 17 brothers and sisters and they didn't know either... 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zen Archer (Raconteur) Posted August 26, 2018 Share Posted August 26, 2018 I'm reading a book about how super glue was invented, I can't put it down. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tamthebam Posted August 26, 2018 Share Posted August 26, 2018 3 hours ago, Zen Archer said: I'm reading a book about how super glue was invented, I can't put it down. Better call Sol...vite. These glue jokes are not to be sniffed at. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bold Rover Posted August 27, 2018 Share Posted August 27, 2018 6 hours ago, tamthebam said: These glue jokes are not to be sniffed at. When I was young, adhere them all the time. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
johnnydun Posted August 27, 2018 Share Posted August 27, 2018 I remember trying to impress a girl by putting my foot down on the pedal ... Spoiler But it turns out she had seen a bin open that way before. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cerberus Posted August 28, 2018 Share Posted August 28, 2018 What’s grey, Scottish and depressing?Scotland. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jagfox Posted August 28, 2018 Share Posted August 28, 2018 Thought I'd try and spice up the love life with a bit of auto asphyixiation. I wouldn't recommend it. It's been five days and she's still lying on the couch giving me the silent treatment.... 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hedgecutter Posted August 28, 2018 Share Posted August 28, 2018 7 hours ago, Cerberus said: What’s grey, Scottish and depressing? What's pink, is often wet & smells of fish? Peterhead 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jagfox Posted September 3, 2018 Share Posted September 3, 2018 Just found out that anal sex is illegal in Iceland. I'm not sure about Aldi, so be careful people... 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jagfox Posted September 4, 2018 Share Posted September 4, 2018 I've surrounded my property with 3 feet tall dildos. My neighbour hates it, but his wife is sitting on the fence... 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Melanius Mullarkey Posted September 4, 2018 Share Posted September 4, 2018 How can you tell your zits are really bad? Blind folk try to read your face. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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