Work colleagues

[ICTChris]

Planned on doing it through your letterbox from the outside. Although, I can imagine you’re one of those creeps with a letterbox at the bottom of their doors.

We have a letterbox at the end of the drive, if you can leave the little arm up that’d be great.

[Muzza81]

14 minutes ago, ICTChris said:

We have a letterbox at the end of the drive, if you can leave the little arm up that’d be great.

 

Whole new meaning to the term ‘mail shot’. HAHAHHA patter!!2

[D.A.F.C]

You talk about it a lot but gave you done anything about it? Presumably your work has harassment, dignity etc guidance? Are you unionised? If it's aimed at you, have you explained why their conduct is perceived as contrary to the above standards? If they've brushed it off have you emailed them a written summary of your conversation and asked them to reply if they have any disagreements with how it went down?

 

If it's rife and you have a paper trail like this to demonstrate a pattern surely you can take it further.

Spoke to senior management and it was brushed off as a joke. Within a day the same senior manager made a comment to me alongside the manager who I complained about as if it was funny.

I have a paper trail and I can prove that I was threatened with the sack despite asking for comments like that to stop. Others have also complained unofficially.

I also have evidence of manipulation of overtime.

My options are to take it to HR or escalate beyond them to the parent company whistle blowing procedure. Both of which will lead to more hassle and stress and I will be alone up against a bunch of lying cheating fucks all backing each other up.

The senior manager who I believe is the puppet master is leaving soon so I'm holding back until after the new year to see what happens. I've also been told that hr are gunning for the manager and might do something now they're not protected.

Ultimately it's my fault for staying there and not getting out sooner but its local and pays well and also my confidence has been knocked by it.

 

Edited to add

No it's not unionised. Also what was said is in direct contradiction of the company handbook. It says one instance of bullying is gross misconduct. I can provide evidence of dozens plus violent outbursts like punching walls and doors, making a fool of senior management at meetings all sorts.

 

 

 

 

 

[Honest_Man#1]

6 hours ago, D.A.F.C said:

You're very lucky that you haven't.
Its not really what you think nobody is going to come up and physically assault you or call you offensive names. Which to be honest would be more preferable.
It's more subtle like backstabbing, snidey putdowns at meetings, denial of what you contribute, being left out socially.
I believe it comes from insecurity and previous problems that make managers act like little kids surrounding themselves with yes men or enablers. It's really bad for business. When it happens it takes a while for you to realise as well which makes it hard to stop.
Also it gets passed off as 'banter' and that you're being too sensitive. If you try it in reverse suddenly you're 'being insubordinate'.
If these people tried it in a pub or outside the workplace they wouldn't last five minutes. They know they can push it and get away with it because most hr departments are only there for the company and are probably already in the back pocket of the narcisstic manager who plays a kiss up kick down style so that no senior manager will ever believe that they would do things like that. Plus it also reflects badly for senior management to knowingly employ someone who abuses or bullies staff because its illegal due to duty of care.
So yeah, the target is singled out as weird or incapable despite being a standout employee.
Sorry for the rant but I tried to explain it.

I’m sorry but a lot of what you’ve said above is the usual complete nonsense from you. Apologies for the lengthy post but...

1. He’s not “very lucky” to not have been bullied at work, as even this thread shows that the majority (nearly everyone bar you, who’s had the bad luck for this supposed terrible bullying to happen to you more than once) haven’t experienced or even seen this type of thing in their workplace.

2. As you’re not giving specific examples, I’m still unsure exactly what the supposed bullying is that’s happening. You mention being left out socially, do people go out for pints and not invite you or something? Unsure how that’s bullying but please correct me with specific examples.

3. You mention it getting passed off as banter. Again some examples would be good to see exactly what you’re talking about, but in my workplace my team and I do have plenty of banter between us, going both ways. As long as the manager is happy to take the same back then I don’t see a problem. It would actually annoy me a bit if someone tried to grass us in to senior management for having a laugh with each other at work (if someone said to me they didn’t like the banter and it was clear they didn’t want to be part of it, absolutely no issue, but complaining about it happening in their presence and trying to say it’s bullying and needs stopped would annoy me).

4. “most hr departments are only there for the company and are probably already in the back pocket of the narcisstic manager” - are you listening to yourself here? Most HR departments? Take your tinfoil hat off and calm down.

I’m sorry you’ve had some bad experiences at work that have warped your mind a bit, but you are simply incorrect in a lot of the wild generalisations you make. I’m going to sound like your bully of a boss here, but (unless you are able to provide specific examples that show it’s not been banter and is out of order) I think you do need to stop taking things to heart so much and jumping straight to being a victim of severe bullying and you might be a bit happier at work.

[welshbairn]

The Inverness Courier has been running stories about a culture of bullying at NHS Highland for years, and millions have been spent by the authorities  investigating it, but no one has been sacked or disciplined afaik. Some of the people making the allegations I vaguely know, and I'm sure they're not making it up, but in all that time the Courier has never described an actual incidence of bullying, just people having to take time off or resign due to stress, so it's hard to tell what they're talking about.

[D.A.F.C]

Obviously I cant be too specific and you've picked up some things wrongly. I didnt go above someone's head without speaking to them first.
It was a last resort. I spoke to them directly and asked them why I was hearing them talk about me as if my job was in danger. Giving actual specific examples and also saying it wasnt happening all the time to everyone, just some. Actually the hardest workers and people who asked questions of why we did things certain ways.
Theres also other very specific things that create divisions such as playing favourites and letting others spy and tell tales, turning others against each other.
Like I said I cant go into specifics and I also clearly know the difference between banter and actual intended nasty threatening behaviour.
I find a pattern of people who have never experienced bullying telling me about bullying. Seems odd, how can you be an authority on something you've never experienced?

[Bairnardo]

Have you tried offering anyone out?

[D.A.F.C]

The Inverness Courier has been running stories about a culture of bullying at NHS Highland for years, and millions have been spent by the authorities  investigating it, but no one has been sacked or disciplined afaik. Some of the people making the allegations I vaguely know, and I'm sure they're not making it up, but in all that time the Courier has never described an actual incidence of bullying, just people having to take time off or resign due to stress, so it's hard to tell what they're talking about.

https://www.gov.scot/publications/report-cultural-issues-related-allegations-bullying-harassment-nhs-highland/

Read this. It took 10 seconds to find.
Bullying has cost millions in the nhs. Money that should be spent on patients.
Bullying also made bankers keep quiet yet it caused a global financial meltdown.
I'm sure it was all in their heads though.
Who cares right? It's just a financial crisis.

[D.A.F.C]

Have you tried offering anyone out?

Not sure what that means.

[Bairnardo]

Just now, D.A.F.C said:

2 minutes ago, Bairnardo said:

Have you tried offering anyone out?
 

Not sure what that means.

Square go

[D.A.F.C]

Square go

Several people have come to violence but theres no problem apparently.

They actually promoted someone to manage people who has been attacked because they're so bad at dealing with people. Its fucked up and too far gone to fix tbh

 

[Bairnardo]

10 minutes ago, D.A.F.C said:

Several people have come to violence but theres no problem apparently.

They actually promoted someone to manage people who has been attacked because they're so bad at dealing with people. Its fucked up and too far gone to fix tbh

 

I wasnt being entirely silly. Perhaps you need to do a wee bit of fight fire with fire if its as bad as you say?

 

[PB1994]

I’m staggered you think not getting invited to spend time with work colleagues outside of work is a negative thing.

[Bairnardo]

1 minute ago, MixuFixit said:

 

K so get the workforce to unionise, put in a subject access request for all emails with your name in the title or the body of the text a month afterwards, if you get turfed out for doing something that's your right, plus all your other evidence I think you'll do OK at a tribunal tbh. If not then you've got a unionised workforce and things will get dramatically better. Win-win.

 

This. Always unionise. 

Offer to be the steward too. 

[GordonD]

9 hours ago, Muzza81 said:

Someone stole my sandwich once

If it was cheese I can suggest where you start looking...

[CountyFan]

1 hour ago, D.A.F.C said:

Several people have come to violence but theres no problem apparently.

They actually promoted someone to manage people who has been attacked because they're so bad at dealing with people. Its fucked up and too far gone to fix tbh

 

Mate, genuinely, if it's the bad why don't you leave? 

Managing staff is a fucking nightmare btw, just to stick up for all the decent bosses out there. 

[Sergeant Wilson]

3 hours ago, D.A.F.C said:

Obviously I cant be too specific and you've picked up some things wrongly. I didnt go above someone's head without speaking to them first.
It was a last resort. I spoke to them directly and asked them why I was hearing them talk about me as if my job was in danger. Giving actual specific examples and also saying it wasnt happening all the time to everyone, just some. Actually the hardest workers and people who asked questions of why we did things certain ways.
Theres also other very specific things that create divisions such as playing favourites and letting others spy and tell tales, turning others against each other.
Like I said I cant go into specifics and I also clearly know the difference between banter and actual intended nasty threatening behaviour.
I find a pattern of people who have never experienced bullying telling me about bullying. Seems odd, how can you be an authority on something you've never experienced?

SHUT UP!

[Dee Man]

21 hours ago, NJ2 said:

A knock to the head suggests he’s not the hardest in his workplace at all. Add to that folk stealing his pieces. 2 and 2 don’t make 5. Muzza would lose a fight to the serially skelped Dee Man imo

I noticed you never tagged me in this in the hope that it flew under the radar - you're claimed ya c**t.

[mizfit]

One of the managers at my work is quite good at making sly digs and passing remarks that can be classed as bullying.

Anytime they’ve tried something with me, I just ignore it, or say something right back.

[ICTChris]

I think one reason why bullying happens is that people are promoted to management jobs without being properly trained or without having their aptitude for managing people properly assessed. In one of my previous jobs if you got to a certain level on the scale you *had*to manage people. That meant that if a really good technician or technical architect, for example, wanted to progress they had to become a people manager. Not everyone is suited to that, some people really aren’t suited to it.