Zen Archer (Raconteur) Posted December 2, 2013 Share Posted December 2, 2013 all whilst wearing slip on shoes by th looks of it f**k all to do with footwear, a wee skelf took out a whiney yank bitch wearing f**k all on her feet. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Swarley Posted December 2, 2013 Share Posted December 2, 2013 From memory Johnny Foreigner was always elbowing and kicking him and cheating. Alf always won through in the end. God bless Alf, God bless England. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ebanda's Handyman Services Posted December 3, 2013 Share Posted December 3, 2013 (edited) That Tesco advert where the guy gives his girlfriend a cup with his face on it and she isn't impressed bugs me. She has a moustache for f**k sake and should be happy that anyone wants to buy her anything other than a bleaching kit for her ungrateful hairy face. She's all smiles when she gets perfume later on though. Everything that is wrong with Christmas right there. Edited December 3, 2013 by Andy C 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cardinal Richelieu Posted December 4, 2013 Share Posted December 4, 2013 Wait till lunchtime then kick her in the pie she'll undoubtedly pick up from Gregg's. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WILLIEA Posted December 4, 2013 Share Posted December 4, 2013 Judging by her size, it's going to be one helluva big pie. I fear I may lose a leg. Conjures up a horrible image of your leg being swallowed by a huge pie. A bit like stepping on quicksand! 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zidane's child Posted December 4, 2013 Share Posted December 4, 2013 I'm at a "workshop" and some big fat bint has just started her presentation by saying she wants to tell us about her "journey" on the project. Arsehole. She sounds like a right nonse Mozz! 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
doulikefish Posted December 4, 2013 Share Posted December 4, 2013 I'm at a "workshop" and some big fat bint has just started her presentation by saying she wants to tell us about her "journey" on the project. Arsehole. Very Americanism 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WILLIEA Posted December 4, 2013 Share Posted December 4, 2013 Had a reccy mission during the coffee break. Too risky to lose a limb so close to Christmas. Probably for the best. Just throw stones and maybe eggs from a distance! 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
broon-loon Posted December 4, 2013 Share Posted December 4, 2013 Judging by her size, it's going to be one helluva big pie. I fear I may lose a leg. Invite her to the office christmas party Mozza', you may lose more than a leg..? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WeAreElgin Posted December 4, 2013 Share Posted December 4, 2013 Dicksons of inverness waited until I was in a taxi heading back up there to phone and tell me my car had failed an mot. p***ks. Now I've got to sit in a shitey co-op cafe, after waiting around inverness for 3 hours, for at least another hour. Thankfully the problem was covered under warranty, stopped the woman in her tracks when she wanted me to pay another £150 on top of the cost of the mot and service. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Northsea80 Posted December 4, 2013 Share Posted December 4, 2013 They didn't have any quail eggs in whole foods! 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hedgecutter Posted December 4, 2013 Share Posted December 4, 2013 The word "footy". Stupid word. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DeadStar Posted December 4, 2013 Share Posted December 4, 2013 Network Rail's 40mph speed limit on trains tomorrow. It's a wee bit of bloody wind and the timetable gets pumped to f**k. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
garybs Posted December 5, 2013 Share Posted December 5, 2013 Network Rail's 40mph speed limit on trains tomorrow. It's a wee bit of bloody wind and the timetable gets pumped to f**k. Oohh boo hoo, here we go again 9-5 commuters moaning like f*ck about them being affected, they want to try getting home via public transport at 0600 on a sunday morning 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
weirdcal Posted December 5, 2013 Share Posted December 5, 2013 (edited) To be fair, it's sounding pretty mental just now. I know this as my neighbour has wind chimes. Wind chimes FFS. Must be like a classical music rave at the moment *editted from the iPhone app !!!! Edited December 5, 2013 by weirdcal 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WeAreElgin Posted December 5, 2013 Share Posted December 5, 2013 Trying to light a fag in this weather is a nightmare. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zidane's child Posted December 5, 2013 Share Posted December 5, 2013 when people in work present you with cakes/biscuits and you politely decline, they then jibe "oh come on it's nearly Christmas". 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
~~~ Posted December 5, 2013 Share Posted December 5, 2013 when people in work present you with cakes/biscuits and you politely decline, they then jibe "oh come on it's nearly Christmas". I hate that, some of them can't seem to understand why you don't want a cake around 9.30am 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Smurph Posted December 5, 2013 Share Posted December 5, 2013 (edited) Checked on the college Moodle if we were to go in today - nothing about not coming in. Came in. Told we could get a self-supported study if we didn't come in. I want to go home. Edit- afternoon class is cancelled now. Edited December 5, 2013 by Smurph 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest The Phoenix Posted December 5, 2013 Share Posted December 5, 2013 Whingeing good for nothing tax dodging students. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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