Reynard

Bought a watercolour by James McBey a few weeks ago and ended up selling it on today. I made a fair bit on it, so much that I couldn't walk away from the deal, but I really liked the painting. I've got more money now but I'm culturally poorer It's still a wrench to sell something like that all the same. Although I still have his etching of the first view of Jerusalem the British army had in WW1 which I'm definitely not selling to anyone. It's an artist proof as well one of the first six off the plate. The Imprial war museum have one Aberdeen art gallery has another. Thats part of my pension fund.

Feck. Rosemary grows like a weed in my place. I have a nice wee low hedge done in rosemary kinda like a small box hedge but it grows a hell of a lot faster and it smells nice. I need to get into the garden and sort it out, the place looks like it has been bombed just now and thats just after two weekends of the kids out playing in it. I've bought a chiminea thing so we can sit outside longer some nights. It's a cast iron one so it will take a bit of planning if someone wants to steal it.

It will probably be fine. My wife goes to all the bother of making proper custard and I prefer Birds custard any day.

Just wade in all guns blazing and talking a load of shite. That's what everyone else does here.

The care commision wifie would have shat herself if she saw the big f**k off cast iron stove I ordered for here yesterday.

Yeah. It definitely didn't used to be as bad as this though. I mean, childminding from home. They expected me to change the front door in case some mutant runs into it? The house is big so we have to have three smoke alarms wired into the mains(fair enough) whereas last time we had those ones that sort of go into a light fitting. A fence round the greehouse in case some kid walks through it. Gates fucking everywhere. Fences all over the fucking place. A dossier to be produced weekly to show what you did with the kid and where you went including photographic proof and how you feel the child benefitted from the trip. Oh there is more, much more. I dont especially blame the wifie that came here, although she is a known bitch. But the vast majority of what they want has absolutely diddly squat to do with looking after someones kids. Thankfully this was a brush with government pish and it will be the last one as far as I am concerned. How they can make something so fucking complex is anyones guess. I was delighted to find that our taxation is being put to such good use. It must be fun running a nursery or a nursing home or something like that. Bloody hell its a one way ticket to ulcerville

Ridiculous encounter with bureaucracy today. The wife was toying with the idea of childminding as it would suit her as we have small kids at school and it would tie in with school holidays and all that crap. Fucking hell!! The list of things this CARE Commision bitch wanted us to do to the house As soon as the wifie left the house the wife and I both looked at each other and said f**k this. The ridiculous thing is that the wife was a registered childminder three years ago and gave it up as she was fed up with it. But the new rules and regulations are astonishing. We have a pile of paperwork here which we are both pointing and laughing at. As soon as the government get involved in anything it becomes fucking retarded.

None of my customers are that sort.

I've got too much work on. I didnt finish until after ten last night (the odd tea break allowed...) and it was the same last week and this week and into next week. It's great to be raking in it in obviously, but I prefer to be just bumping along. I also got a call this morning from "a rival" asking me if I could help out because their framer is off work with the flu and has been signed off another week. So I said I'd help him out. I'm an idiot. But I like the guy and we do help each other out from time to time. It's the busiest start to a year I have had in 20 years, which is bizarre considering the state of the economy.

Can you not get some sort of gloves for the rowing machine? I have a cross trainer at home that I use all the time. I utterly hate running as well but I dont mind that machine. And I can do tabata on it. You should try tabata training BTW.

Got a couple of tons of Scots Pine logs delivered yesterday and started splitting them. I hit one and there was a huge pool of resin inside it which splattered everywhere. And it got in my hair And it doesnt wash out unless I use white spirit on it. This should be fun.

Finished with a tabata thingy tonight. f**k ME! Four minutes of agony

Trying to find yellow bean sauce at the supermarket. None of the fuckers seem to be stocking it just now. And it's the baws.

Your advice is fucking shite.

Took an hour and three quarters to beat him. Let after let after let.

I have a massive grudge game of squash tonight. The court is booked for two hours and I think it will take that long. It will be brutal and I have been psyching myself up for this all day. And I'm fucking pleased its an indoor pursuit considering it's blawing a hoolie out there.

You are probably right. I do think when you are younger you tend to be more active than you realise too. I definitely put on a few pounds when I was in my mid thirties too, but that was mostly down to the fact I did f**k all. I stopped playing football and stuff like that. When I was your age I had a 32" waist. I still do at 41.

I simply can't be arsed doing anything today.

I wouldn't obsess about it by weighing yourself. Just keep doing what you are doing and judge yourself visually. You will know by looking that things are getting better. If you are eating normally and taking some exercise you will lose weight. You can't fail. It's gradual though, don't expect to go for a run and wake up the next morning looking like a hunger striker.

I play squash three times a week. Two of the games are full on competition, the other is social. I use a crosstrainer at home and I do 15-20k on it the days I dont play squash as it is great for stamina and it doesn't impact my joints at all. I'll quite often do the crosstrainer after squash mainly because I am mental. I do a fairly light weight thingy every other night. I only have my own weights at home so I'm limited with the amount of weight I can hurl around. I have about 90kilos worth of weights here though so I can do some sort of squat exercises with that. It does me anyway. I try and mix up what I do with the weights too. I basically stopped playing football when I was in my thirties because I had become self employed and I really didn't want to risk breaking something and being unable to work. I know I could do myself some mischief playing squash too, but at least its fairly non contact. I'm more liable to lose an eye than anything else anyway. I do a bit of hillwalking when I get the chance too and we go out walking with the kids as well just because its good fun for them. I'm in good nick for an old b*****d.

Its laziness. The type of folk that would rather go to a surgeon than actually get off their arse and take control of their life.

Too right. Distance running is a fast track to knee and hip replacement surgery. If you dont want to be out and about get a crosstrainer machine. All the same motion as running and uses the same muscles but it doesn't impact on your joints. Cycling is great too of course.

It won't even be an issue for another decade at least. I did start to get heavier in my mid thirties, mainly because I quite playing football with my mates. I was always able to pretty much eat whatever I liked too and I still do, although I'm active again so it doesnt matter at all. I'm fitter now than I was as a teenager or in my twenties. I do have to work at it now though as I was always on the go when I was younger. I didn't learn to drive until I was 25 so I was used to walking or cycling for miles daily. As soon as you start driving you get lazy.

I'm better looking and the chicks love me.

Thats right. You dont need to go berserk to get yourself fitter. The trouble is that people get discouraged once they decided to do something about their diet and fitness levels. They expect to see results right away and for most people that just doesn't happen. It takes a while and folk need to be aware of it and just try not to chuck it when they dont have a six pack within a fortnight. It takes a long time to turn yourself into a fat mess and it will take a while to shift fat off again. Eating sensibly and walking the length of yourself as often as possible will do the trick. You dont need to be sweating like a rapist to shift weight. My mate lost about three stones just by walking to his work every day instead of driving. He's probably walking about four or five miles a day which will be burning three or four hundred calories at least. He eats the same stuff he always did and still does his Norm out Cheers impersonation every night. But he looks like he did when he was twenty. A bald ugly b*****d.