Monster

It's the entrepreneurial spirit though - there were folk offering plastic shopping bags from Tesco for 3p on e-bay just after the 5p charge came in.

Lovely colourway, good find!

I would reckon your best bet is a pair of Stan Smith. Classic white are the second best selling adidas trainer of all time (Superstars with the shell toe are the best seller) but you can get all kinds of colours of suede and even Parrell Williams designed ones if you want to shell out £85. Schuh have some nice burgundy suede ones in their sale just now for £36.99. I'm currently mulling over the recent Stan Smith from American Dad pair, but at £90 they're a bit steep.

Ooft, they are a wide fitting for Adidas, so you'd best swerve the Dragon. Try a pair of Hamburg, they're pretty wide. Schuh, Office or Size? will have them.

Inevitably in Scotland those who give their weans the most horrific names have a surname that makes the horrific name somewhat worse. I mean, calling your kid 'Armani' is pretty grim, but if you then add a surname like, say.... McGlinchey it's just a clusterfuck. Armani McGlinchey - just let that sink in.

Campus 80 are comfy indeed. Dragons are very popular but they are extremely narrow, so if you have a wide fitting then best to avoid. If not and you fancy them, then they're about true to size or maybe a half size up at a push.

I think the casinos have started calling them 'Freedom fries' actually.

After a short* period of study, I have determined her tits are different sizes. Why? *45 minutes of drooling and one satisfying w**k

That's a disgusting picture to put up. That poor beagle. You could have given it a spliff, or a cigar at the very least. It's 'Chrimbo' for fuxake!

They're just badly trained. Pointless asking them any trainer-related question.

On the high street it's more or less jd sports or size. There's also Bank, Office and USC but they're all heavily promoting the Geordie Shore style of fashion these days, which to me looks like a cross between an American Teenage Jock look and shaving your chest to look like a woman. In footwear terms this tends to mean they are heavily promoting plimsolls like Converse or Vans, and hi-tops like Nike blazer. Best way is online: ^These, plus e-bay, Footlocker, Trainerstation, Crooked Tongues, Offspring.

Settle Wolfie....see below. That makes you a tink. Busted.... When Brechin finally gets inside toilets you maybe get an opinion.

Gazelle Indoor. It's all JD Sports shite.

Two years ago: "How dare you make us start in the bottom division?!?! We're the same fucking club!!!" Today:"How dare you fine us for EBT's?!?!?! We're a completely different club!!!" The Rangers: the comedy gift that just keeps on giving.

Completely depends. For example, Gazelle II are so narrow I can't wear them, Gazelle Indoor are as wide as boats. The length is totally variable as well, I have 11, 11.5, 12, 12.5 and 13 in different models and all fit. Pick a trainer you want and ask on here and I'll tell you wide or narrow, short or long.

Having an en-suite makes you a snob? I did have squid for dinner the other week, and used the word 'protagonist' in conversation, so I suppose I'm not only middle class but a snob now too. Jolly good!

I wouldn't let it cheer you for long, he's the type of unstable individual who can't live without this place. He'll have an alias on the go within ten minutes of any ban.

Two weans at the fitba yesterday had Gazelle O.G. on, and the other one had NB. You must walk about with your eyes shut!

A girl at my primary school who was on the large side spent the whole of primary 7 pestering people to tell her why everyone was calling her LMO. The last week of the year someone told her: 'Land Mass One'. She wasn't impressed. Another girl we knew had severe psoriases and her dad was a baker: 'Flaky Bake'. Many years ago one of my mates older brother's pals sat on a cd and it cut his arse so badly he spent the entire Saturday night in casualty. It actually was the cd single 'Saturday Night' and he still gets called Whigfield.

I haven't heard that one before. It's not impossible, although the jeans I have are good quality and don't appear to be market stall jobs. You, and thousands of wedge haircuts.

Surely Gazelle O.G. are the most boring and prevalent pair of /// anywhere? Every time I see a group of youngsters in their skinny jeans with droppy arses, daft Geordie Shore haircuts and pointless aztec print vests there is always at least one wearing New Balance and at least one wearing Gazelle O.G. I am biased because I have a real soft spot for Spezials I guess. You're spot on about Rekord though. I have a pair of '08 in the argentina colourway and they are the dogs bollocks. Might wear them out later now that I read this.

I've seen both in the flesh and IMO the Brussels colourway are much nicer. On the subject of long lost brands, I have a pair of vintage Le Shark jeans from the early 90's that I still wear. Not everyone's cup of tea Le Shark, but I loved it.

They're all good but you have little or no chance of getting any of them as they're all rare as hen's teeth now unless you are prepared to pay stupid money. Haven't seen the Spezials anywhere in that colourway (London) for a while, the green Trimm Star you get on ebay from time to time depending on your size but you'll pay £100 and the Stockholms re-issue are not the best quality and expect to pay £140 on e-bay. Dave is spot on, you can get a superb looking pair of adidas (Rekord, for example) that most folk won't have heard of for half the price of the Stockholms everyone is wearing just now.

You can buy various kinds of protector that will keep moisture off your trainers. Crep Protect is one, get for about £9 on ebay and will completely cover two pairs. You Tube will show you clips of folk spraying Crep Protect (and other brands) on their shoes, running them under the tap and the water just skiting off. Remarkable!

I have the brown Trimm Star and the suede is decent. I've been quite lucky in the sense that I haven't had any with very poor quality. Some of them are helluva hairy though.