Fullerene

Put a piece of the stinkiest cheese possible on her desk and leave a message saying "I have learnt - Bye."

The stand-up comedian Jeremy Hardy died recently. I recall one line he said: "It must be wonderful being a Lib Dem politician. You can promise anything - a giraffe in every garden - and it doesn't matter because you'll never form the government and you'll never have to deliver on any of these promises". That was said long ago, before the Lib Dems went into coalition with the Tories. However I find it relevant. I feel with Brexit that the Tories are offering a giraffe in every garden, have absolutely no idea how to deliver on it, have not got hold of a single giraffe and are trying to blame the EU for all their difficulties. Now if it had been duck billed platypuses then that might have been easier ...

Yes but unfortunately all past governments have also found it convenient to take a regular swipe at the EU and portrayed membership as something to be endured rather than something beneficial. Basically they are waiting for a UK government with a positive attitude and in all honesty they don't expect that is going to happen any time soon.

Donald Tusk isn't criticising all Brexiteers and all Leave voters - only those had absolutely no idea how they would implement the whole thing. Which - by sheer coincidence - is all of them.

"Oh but we do have a plan." "Really. What is it?" "Oh there you go again. Bossing us about."

"Something else" This is like asking a child to write a Santa list expecting they will write Scaletrix or train set. Instead they write "something really good". So you get them a Scaletrix. "Already got that". Then a train set. "I was hoping for something better than that". As long as they never say what it is, they can just keep asking for more.

Of course it doesn't exist. Has nobody heard about gravity?

I wonder if the Nissan bosses paid attention to the Brexit vote in Sunderland. "We were creating employment in their area but to them we are just bloody foreigners." If a Nissan executive from Japan moved to Sunderland, their children would probably be bullied at school and told to go home. Hardly the welcoming environment that anyone would want.

I totally agree that is emotional - a siege mentality. "I want my country back." Actually it had never been taken away. "I'm sick of them telling us what to do" Yes the EU tells the UK what to do but it also tells Germany what to do, and France, and Italy and all the others. 27 countries don't seem to have a problem accepting rules that have been agreed to collectively. It's called consensus. It's called being a team player. I think some Leave voters are looking forward to the hardship, bulldog spirit and all that. I predict "Because you f***ing voted for it" will become a common expression after Brexit.

It's like someone moving out of the family home. Does it still count if you move to a house only three doors down? Does it still count if you still live on the same street? Voters were asked if they wanted to Remain in the EU or Leave. After the voters went for Leave - nobody ask them how much. "We've leaving the family home - Australia here we come." ("You know - New Zealand is even further away") For people like Farage and UKIP and the ERG, any deal with the EU will be seen as betrayal. They can afford to endure the purest of pure Brexits. I doubt everybody else can.

I recall being in Angola when David Bowie died. As a Portuguese speaking country, the main news channel was Brazilian. It devoted a lot of time to his death. I thought why would they devote so much time to David Bowie - surely Brazil has something equivalent. Similarly, I encounter foreigners talking about the Beatles, the Rolling Stones, William Shakespeare, Charles Dickens and James Bond films. You would think this might count as exceptionalism. Yet the Brexiteers show no interest in any of this. They are more interested in great battles and world conquest. In the past, militarily, the UK had one big advantage - a giant moat. Once some fool invented the airplane, that changed everything. For the future, there are no colonies to be created and I doubt there will be any great battles and territory to gain. I guess the Brexiteers haven't realised that the world has moved on.

Hitler and all that.. I thought he was dead.

Yeah. The last time I was in Central Park, it was full of chickens - so obviously he knows his stuff.

Yeah but never mind. We'll get some marvelous deals from countries that really don't need us at all. That will show them!

I can't understand why Nissan are leaving. During our Christmas season of war films, we deliberately chose not to show "Bridge over the River Kwai" in case they might take offence. No appreciation whatsoever!

What is wrong with you? We've just had the Christmas break - season of peace and goodwill - and for us, that means lots of war films on the TV. I watched all of them and I didn't spot any T34 tanks or any Russians now that I think about it. I think Russian involvement in the Second World War is somewhat overstated. What am I missing?

For anyone wondering how the name "Super Bowl" came about, the original tournament began with Lawn Bowling. The New England Patriots beat the Florida Pensioners decisively in 1923 to win the first cup. Later, under pressure from advertisers, they changed it beyond all recognition but at least they kept the name.

Quote from the Spectator last week. "Caroline Spelman’s Brexit amendment – saying that Britain should not leave the EU without a deal – has passed in the Commons tonight. The amendment – which won by 318 votes to 310 – displays Parliamentary opposition to a no deal exit, but it is purely advisory and has no legislative force. This means the amendment is not binding on the government. Despite this, the defeat demonstrates the possibility that, as the end of March approaches, parliamentary opposition to no deal could prove enough to prevent Britain crashing out of the EU." Seems like a contradiction here somewhere !

.. and we also gave Napoleon a bloody nose as well, you ungrateful lot!

No problems there I suspect but traitors like you won't be allowed back!

The reason this doesn't happen is because conspiracy-theory paranoia brigade that exists within the Labour party. If anyone challenges Corbyn, these people immediately come out of woodwork and claim it is all a Blairite or Thatcherite plot to dispose of socialism altogether and lock us into a neo-conservative agenda for all time. There is nothing they love more than a leadership contest but once it is over they go back into hibernation. Even if you offered up a challenger like this - they would smell a rat . You're only pretending to be similar to Corbyn to get votes but once elected you will reveal your true colours.

Corbyn was seen as an extremist because he thought that violence in Northern Ireland would not end unless we started talking to the IRA. When John Major and Tony Blair came to the same conclusion that was seen as common sense. Probably the key difference was how they went about. On this, I might accuse Corbyn of being clumsy, incompetent or insensitive but not extreme. Similarly, if he expresses concern for the Palestinians then this is seen as anti-Jewish, anti-Semitic and almost as support for terrorism. Yet when a more accepted mainstream politician says the same thing, again it is seen as common sense, yes, the Palestinians have it bad, we need to do something about it. Corbyn likes to play Devil's Advocate a lot. Personally I think that is a good thing but I am not sure he is as skilful at it as he needs to be.

If this was a valid proposition (and personally I don't think it is) then the people in the Republic of Ireland would rightly say that they should get to vote on being in the EU or not and their votes should be added to the total. We are constantly told that there is widespread support in the Republic for the EU. Add those votes into the pot. Suddenly the total votes for UK and the Republic combined swings behind Remain. Since collectively we decided to Remain, Brexit is cancelled. The Republic then decides there is no need to be part of the UK after all. It almost sounds like a plan.

Eeny-Meeny-Miney-Mo = 1, 2, 3, Lots. She spoke to four people.

The argument against a new political party has always been "Look what happened to the SDP". However there are differences. The SDP were never going to get the vote from "Always been Labour" (or "Always been <anything else>" for that matter). Thatcher got a boost from the Falklands War. The SDP included David Owen. The same people who thought Michael Foot was a poor leader would say the same about Jeremy Corbyn but Michael Foot was never presented with a crisis such as Brexit. Personally, if a new party came to power simply to change the electoral system, that alone would be an improvement. This entire disaster has come about because of the far right of the Tory party has always threaten to defect to UKIP and they are able to use this threat to get their way.