Like I always say I'm no expert.
Seems like the anxiety of the aftermath is the thing that's doing you in. Also the guilt that you may be the one to blame.
Try not to load the burden on yourself mate.
We had a boy in the high school team that was a cross between Dave MacPherson & Harry Maguire. Scored the most spectacular O.Gs.
Bullet headers into the top bin.
Wanted to kill the fucking donkey everytime, but it was too funny.