carpetmonster

His pal Carl seems nice

Ass so fat you can see it from the front

Peter Dow. I don't think he was ginger tho. His blog's still going - https://peter-dow.blogspot.com/

That one could be regional even in the US; in the Midwest it's '***-day'. Wonder if the swear filter will pick me up on that? ETA - yup.

The Gray? Words Americans Can’t Spell Properly for this pish IMVHO.

Couldn’t you just cut the bread in half and use two slots?

I love BRJ. It’s meant to be most similar to ‘A Bad Wind Blows’ if you’re familiar with his older stuff. And if not, that’s a great LP too.

As long as Unibroue keep going, there will be a point to Canada

He only gets to continue because he changed the rules that Florida governors have to resign the statehouse if they’re running for President. Greasy c**t.

Weirdly, if they’re talking about Glasgow, KY, they pronounce it correctly and not ‘Glasscow’ - it’s about 10 seconds into this

Eh. I wouldn’t have said so. Some folks definitely look better in glasses. Anderson Cooper just looks weird without his

I’d be fine, I live on the third floor.

You don’t think they’d just brass it out given his wee brother’s the spitting image of Jim Hewitt? (And also more than a passing resemblance to Kevin de Bruyne if anyone fancies starting a new conspiracy theory)

‘Mirror’ as ‘meer’ is the one that always jars me when my kid says it.

On the terraces I have a vivid memory of the old boy joining in with a chant of ‘Duffy, Duffy cut your hair’ at a St Mirren vs Dundee game despite him being able to pass for Bobby Charlton in certain lights at the time.

Marlena Shaw’s going from California Soul to a New York hole. https://www.mirror.co.uk/3am/celebrity-news/breaking-jazz-rb-legend-marlena-31917521

To be fair to Kim, he was likely just being polite and thought she winked at him, even if she didn't.

That’s more like it

Wild fermented golden ale from Off Color. Very good, but more of a sipper than I’m ideally looking for at half five on a Friday

I am now going to appropriate 'conker hair' to describe my pubes.

I did toy with the idea of phoning and asking if they’d do a boob on one side and an arse cheek on the other for $4k but that would’ve been defeated by nobody in Miami understanding Scottish accents. The wife can speak Spanish but she just told me to f**k off.

It’s totally normalized there. Miami TV you’ll get adverts for plastic surgeons on a Saturday morning between the cartoons. $4k for new tits and $3.5k for a new arse was the going rate IIRC.

Long-termism probably hasn’t been a thing since Attlee and Bevan founded the NHS. 24/7 news and the internet make me gloomy that anyone else will give it a bash in future.

I think in some places/circles it’s just ‘the thing to do’. White 50-somethings in Miami all look like a hamster who shoved nuts in his pouches, walked into a gale force headwind and stayed that way.