Ebanda's Handyman Services

Talk rubbish I do. Hmmmm.

You need to be cruel to be kind sometimes. She might think that you're interested. She'll be telling all her pals that a nice guy gave her his number and they'll be all giggly and excited for her and planning wedding dress fittings and putting deposits down for venues for the big day etc. Break her heart now but save her financial heartbreak in the near future.

Have you tried telling her that you aren't interested?

I was sitting with 4 tens on Sky Poker on Saturday night and thought, "Braw, I'll reign the c***s in and skin the lot of them!" Ended up winning 80p. I'd turned £1 into £5 in the space of minutes previously too.

Good luck when the time comes SD. Our girl was born within an hour and a half but the wife said it was a lot worse than the 16 hours she took for our boy. Apparently the second birth is notoriously fast. Fingers crossed for you if today is a significant date.

Understandable. He's managed to get games on in a lot worse although the recent shitty weather won't help him any.

Set your alarm for ten past then. Ho ho ho. Have you any inside info on the Starks Park pitch yet bud?

An Alsatian accosted me one night and it was one slight movement from myself from wrapping it's gums around my limbs. When it's owner got it on the lead I had a right go at him whilst trying to hold in the imminent shite that the near attack brought about. Scary creatures like!

My wee girl has that daft sickness bug that's going around. We're taking 5 hour sleeping shifts just in case the poor wee thing chokes.

Watched Slumdog Millionaire tonight and felt that it totally lived up to the hype. Fantastic film. 9/10.

I hate the Skill Skool part of SoccerAM and wish they'd do away with it.

Lecturing? Good luck with the studies.

What are you aiming for after university vT?

But then his Mum will start the punching too and I've had enough.

Wee shite that he is. He'll know all about it when I introduce his baseball bat into our boxing matches. Hope you're feeling better soon pal. Fudge -

Bloody nightmare, eh! My brilliant wee Mum, in her infinite wisdom, decided to get Cole a pair of boxing gloves. I've been battered about the living room like Rihanna. He declares himself the champion and then gives me some more punches.

No, a dark haired chap. He sounds like a caricatured Mr Bean.

Aye. I'd love to go on and beat him just to laugh in his wispy moustachioed face.

The male contestant on Countdown has a terrible voice.

This guy is maybe really nice to the girl and his 'fanny' persona may be a defence mechanism for low self esteem. He might also have a big, long and fat cock that he uses to pelt her rotten. There are ways of letting this girl know that you like her without looking like you are trying to cut this guys grass. Put a wee seed of thought in her mind and if she comes to you, she comes to you. If she doesn't, f**k her! Not literally of course because that would likely land you in the jail for rape.

Yep, his arse has exploded. I like the reputation point thing. It's a kind of background feature that is easy ignored if need be.

Kilt -100. Sorry! Couldn't resist.

Just tear him apart and take his ticket for a refund. You can't just sit there and watch him beg! Edit:- Starting to snow a wee bit in Kirkcaldy.

Starter in my Focus is buggered too and I've not been able to get it to the garage for the snow and ice. As a result I've been going through a ream of petrol and money by driving the bigger car everywhere. You no' been able to bump it Gogo?

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