Mr Bairn Posted March 12, 2014 Share Posted March 12, 2014 Tho mates come first you need to think about your situation, sort that out first and if your mate needs somewhere temp then tell him you have a couch, no need to get messed about like that losing out on rent money I'm not losing out on rent money right now. It's a 3 bed we've got, and the guy who left is on hook for his share until mid August. We also don't want to move at the end of the tenency because a) We like our flat and b) For as much of a decent guy my remaining flatmate is, I couldn't hack living with solely him. I want my mate moving in because the alternative is probably the uni (who own the flat) moving someone in for us, and the kinda people on those waiting lists are there because nobody else wants to live with them. I agree that he's probably screwing me over but I need him more than he needs me right now. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NotThePars Posted March 12, 2014 Share Posted March 12, 2014 I wouldn't say he's intentionally screwing you over, mate. He's obviously just worried about the state of his relationship and he's caught between trying to make it work and giving it space. Worth remembering that he's more than likely caught up too much in that to consider you at the moment. Best let him know that the flat situation isn't permanent unless he fully commits to it but obviously let him know he can have the couch temporarily if need be. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lisa Cuddy Posted March 12, 2014 Share Posted March 12, 2014 There's a large and obvious clue in my post. So you did. I can't believe I missed that. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stellaboz Posted March 12, 2014 Share Posted March 12, 2014 On a similar note, I tend to get horrible downers after a good time. Even if it's meeting some mates or going out to lunch with someone and having a good time, I'll get really down afterwards at some point. I know it's coming and have tried many things to stop it happening, so I try to just ride it and get it down with. Absolutely non of this is anything to do with alcohol either. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wulliamwallace Posted March 12, 2014 Share Posted March 12, 2014 Depression is a horrible illness, sometimes you don't even know you have it.I have suffered it for many years and did not know what was going on at first, stupid little things would set me off and i could spend days not talking to anyone not interested in anyone or anything, locked in my room with the curtains shut sometimes drinking and smoking lots of weed, having major arguments with my family and friends and acting a p***k and i did not know why.Then six years ago to be blunt i was assaulted by a gang of neds and left with a brain injury, i tried to go back to work 2 months later when i should have been off for around one year, eventually i had to give it up, i lost my licence for around a year too and fought tooth and nail to get it back from the nazi DVLA which after numerous medicals resitting my test and bringing in lawyers i did, the folk that attacked me only 4 were caught one turned grass and one got away and one took the wrap and got a slap on the wrist for attempted murder at glasgow high court, one even got community service.This is when my depression was at its worst i felt let down by courts, by DVLA, i felt useless and my family were going through hell. I had all sorts going through my head, revenge, suicide and much more dark thoughts.Eventually i finally agreed to seek help for my head injury as my family were struggling and didn't know what to do, it was then that a doctor told me i was suffering from depression and PTSD and referred me to a psychologist, a few years talking to him and going to brain rehab and help and support from my family organizations and one friend in particular, i am now living my life to the full i still have bad days but i now appreciate the good things in life and try not to let little things bother me anymore, i now work abroad with that friends company and i cant thank him enough, i have a motto where i take the good from the bad, anything bad that happens i find some good in it and hold on to it.I'm not one for telling this story but if it helps anyone out there, i urge you to get help there's nothing wrong with doing so, we all have problems sometimes we feel them more than others but talking to someone who can listen and tell you why you feel the way you do really can help. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lyle Lanley Posted March 13, 2014 Share Posted March 13, 2014 (edited) Depression is a horrible illness, sometimes you don't even know you have it. I have suffered it for many years and did not know what was going on at first, stupid little things would set me off and i could spend days not talking to anyone not interested in anyone or anything, locked in my room with the curtains shut sometimes drinking and smoking lots of weed, having major arguments with my family and friends and acting a p***k and i did not know why. Then six years ago to be blunt i was assaulted by a gang of neds and left with a brain injury, i tried to go back to work 2 months later when i should have been off for around one year, eventually i had to give it up, i lost my licence for around a year too and fought tooth and nail to get it back from the nazi DVLA which after numerous medicals resitting my test and bringing in lawyers i did, the folk that attacked me only 4 were caught one turned grass and one got away and one took the wrap and got a slap on the wrist for attempted murder at glasgow high court, one even got community service. This is when my depression was at its worst i felt let down by courts, by DVLA, i felt useless and my family were going through hell. I had all sorts going through my head, revenge, suicide and much more dark thoughts. Eventually i finally agreed to seek help for my head injury as my family were struggling and didn't know what to do, it was then that a doctor told me i was suffering from depression and PTSD and referred me to a psychologist, a few years talking to him and going to brain rehab and help and support from my family organizations and one friend in particular, i am now living my life to the full i still have bad days but i now appreciate the good things in life and try not to let little things bother me anymore, i now work abroad with that friends company and i cant thank him enough, i have a motto where i take the good from the bad, anything bad that happens i find some good in it and hold on to it. I'm not one for telling this story but if it helps anyone out there, i urge you to get help there's nothing wrong with doing so, we all have problems sometimes we feel them more than others but talking to someone who can listen and tell you why you feel the way you do really can help. Sorry to hear mate. Like i said on here before, if you want a chat about anything then you can pm me whenever you want. Edited March 13, 2014 by Eoin Doyle 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mizfit Posted March 13, 2014 Share Posted March 13, 2014 Feel like I should post an update today. One year ago today I was made redundant, by f**k it hurt, especially as it was a family company and they couldn't afford to keep me on. I ended up working at a fast good restaurant and drinking heavily. This cycle of nightshift cleaning, drinking & weight gain continued for 7 months. I never confided in my doctor about it however unlike others here. I just kept going. Then In august I got a new job, even though it's in a call centre it's, its a career you can make something of yourself in. Opportunities everywhere. As well as that I've lost a stone in weight since January. Granted it's not much but it's a start. My family still want me to go speak to a doctor but I don't want to, does anyone feel I would be better. Confiding in a doctor or just keep going by myself with friends and family support? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Ginger Prince Posted March 13, 2014 Share Posted March 13, 2014 (edited) Right, here goes.. I suffered really really badly from Post Natal Depression when my son was born in 2010. To put into context the situation I was facing, 9 months before he was born I was a freshly turned 18 year old boy who thought it was class I could just stroll into clubs nae bother, going to college doing some shitey computing course and still living at home with my Mother. Fast forward to April I've got my own flat with my sons mother, a full time job at Sainsburys and son who would arrive on the 1st of June, it was a lot for an 18 year old boy to take on at once. It took me a long time to admit this but I crumbled, I was operating on autopilot. I was a terrible father, in the sense that feeding, changing, cuddling, spending time with my son was something I resented and not something I looked forward to or enjoyed. Now, I find myself in the situation where I've found someone else and currently live with her down in England (that's a different story for another day) and she has honestly been my saviour. The shite thing is, my little boy is still in Edinburgh, I go to visit him every 8 weeks and speak to him at least 2-3 times a week. The thing I wrestle with on a daily basis is that I chose to leave and move down here, does that make me a shite Dad? There were a lot of circumstances which dictated that leaving Edinburgh and moving away was the best thing to do, but should I have put up with it for the sake of my son? As I genuinely believe that if I had stayed in Scotland I wouldn't be here any longer (was seriously contemplating suicide) but I can't help but think that what I've done is wrong and that my son will end up hating me as he gets older. Edited March 13, 2014 by Rowan Vine's beard 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lyle Lanley Posted March 14, 2014 Share Posted March 14, 2014 A little update on myself: Been feeling really happy in the last few weeks, I'm getting all of my confidence back i lost a few months ago. Was at the hospital again on Tuesday for the first time in 3months and i found out i have put on a bit of weight after losing so much last year Everything is going well for me at the moment and I'm just hoping that continues. Right, here goes.. I suffered really really badly from Post Natal Depression when my son was born in 2010. To put into context the situation I was facing, 9 months before he was born I was a freshly turned 18 year old boy who thought it was class I could just stroll into clubs nae bother, going to college doing some shitey computing course and still living at home with my Mother. Fast forward to April I've got my own flat with my sons mother, a full time job at Sainsburys and son who would arrive on the 1st of June, it was a lot for an 18 year old boy to take on at once. It took me a long time to admit this but I crumbled, I was operating on autopilot. I was a terrible father, in the sense that feeding, changing, cuddling, spending time with my son was something I resented and not something I looked forward to or enjoyed. Now, I find myself in the situation where I've found someone else and currently live with her down in England (that's a different story for another day) and she has honestly been my saviour. The shite thing is, my little boy is still in Edinburgh, I go to visit him every 8 weeks and speak to him at least 2-3 times a week. The thing I wrestle with on a daily basis is that I chose to leave and move down here, does that make me a shite Dad? There were a lot of circumstances which dictated that leaving Edinburgh and moving away was the best thing to do, but should I have put up with it for the sake of my son? As I genuinely believe that if I had stayed in Scotland I wouldn't be here any longer (was seriously contemplating suicide) but I can't help but think that what I've done is wrong and that my son will end up hating me as he gets older. Sorry to hear that mate I know i may come across as an total arse on here at times but anytime you want someone to speak to or even just to let out a rant, you can pm me anytime bud. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Ginger Prince Posted March 14, 2014 Share Posted March 14, 2014 A little update on myself: Been feeling really happy in the last few weeks, I'm getting all of my confidence back i lost a few months ago. Was at the hospital again on Tuesday for the first time in 3months and i found out i have put on a bit of weight after losing so much last year Everything is going well for me at the moment and I'm just hoping that continues. Sorry to hear that mate I know i may come across as an total arse on here at times but anytime you want someone to speak to or even just to let out a rant, you can pm me anytime bud. Nice one mate thanks for that. Likewise with you, anytime 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
P.C Posted March 14, 2014 Share Posted March 14, 2014 Sorry to hear mate. To be fair at 18 having a fulltime job and a kid is going to cause alot of stress and you will feel trapped (my parents had me at 18 and got divorced a few years later). As long as you are still involved with your childs life and help support him then its fine, no point staying in a relationship for the sake of the kid it would come to a head eventually so better you and your ex can be happy seperately 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ebbes20silkcut Posted March 14, 2014 Share Posted March 14, 2014 (edited) I feel my symptoms coming on again been around 10 years since I last had it on that occasion I lived alone, with just my dog for company I would get home from work before I was signed off. Lock the gates and just hope that nobody y bothered me again . I would take it day at a time if one day was a bad one then I would just say to myself " ok write this one off hopefully tomorrow will be better"that's the only way I could tackle it . I got fluoxatine from the doctor which helped, Now I am married with two fantastic kids but I am self employed, work is quiet just now I have a couple of weeks to get past before work picks up again. I just an in serious debt I have jobs pending that rely on me to supply goods but I need to clear my account at my supplier to get the goods only £136 , but I have nothing just now I feel I'm letting my family down, I work hard but struggle to make ends meet I can honestly say that in 2 or 3 months I could be finished I enjoy my work but something has to change very quickly or I've had it. I feel like I'm existing not living but to see my kids faces makes me feel so guilty that if they can be so happy why can't I. Edited March 14, 2014 by ebbes20silkcut 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Raidernation Posted March 15, 2014 Share Posted March 15, 2014 Just started new job, it's bloody hard going, but I should be able to make money. Bank is being cunto with me though and I need to replace flooring in my house so my eldest girl and her wee one can move in, then next eldest, her boyfriend and their wee one will move in in June. Not going to charge any reny, between them they can pay the utility bills and save up. Just so pissed off the bank are being such arses, not like I have a car loan, or a mortgage, but still winna loan me money to fix up the house. It's really getting me down 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DA Baracus Posted March 15, 2014 Share Posted March 15, 2014 Just started new job, it's bloody hard going, but I should be able to make money. Bank is being cunto with me though and I need to replace flooring in my house so my eldest girl and her wee one can move in, then next eldest, her boyfriend and their wee one will move in in June. Not going to charge any reny, between them they can pay the utility bills and save up. Just so pissed off the bank are being such arses, not like I have a car loan, or a mortgage, but still winna loan me money to fix up the house. It's really getting me down That's a bit w**k. Seems banks are scum everywhere. Can't you get a family member to take it and you pay them? Not ideal I'd imagine but maybe an option. I've read what you've posted on here and I can't pretend to know how you feel. You're some guy to still be going so strong. Were I the type of fanny to wear a hat it would be taken off to you. Luckily I don't wear a hat. I can understand how things can get on top of you when you aren't feeling well though. I'm certain you'll find a way to sort it as you come across as the type of guy who can. Just don't start selling crystal meth. Well actually you can, but just ensure you don't get carried away. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RH33 Posted March 16, 2014 Share Posted March 16, 2014 A little update on myself: Been feeling really happy in the last few weeks, I'm getting all of my confidence back i lost a few months ago. Was at the hospital again on Tuesday for the first time in 3months and i found out i have put on a bit of weight after losing so much last year Everything is going well for me at the moment and I'm just hoping that continues. Sorry to hear that mate I know i may come across as an total arse on here at times but anytime you want someone to speak to or even just to let out a rant, you can pm me anytime bud. That's weird on the mobile app only the Rowan part of Rowan vines beard is quoted so had my avatar! Was confused reading the quoted part and thinking I never wrote that!! 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Ginger Prince Posted March 17, 2014 Share Posted March 17, 2014 That's weird on the mobile app only the Rowan part of Rowan vines beard is quoted so had my avatar! Was confused reading the quoted part and thinking I never wrote that!! Aye that happens all the time, anytime I get quoted it shows your avatar 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Raidernation Posted March 29, 2014 Share Posted March 29, 2014 Apparently I had a massive panic/anxiety attack on Thursday, couldn't breathe, chest pains etc. Hospital took several hours to calm me down and get my pulse even close to 100 (was nearly 140 when I went in) So, I now have to get treatment and take meds for anxiety/stress. f**k this shit 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
eindhovendee Posted March 29, 2014 Share Posted March 29, 2014 Apparently I had a massive panic/anxiety attack on Thursday, couldn't breathe, chest pains etc. Hospital took several hours to calm me down and get my pulse even close to 100 (was nearly 140 when I went in) So, I now have to get treatment and take meds for anxiety/stress. f**k this shit I know it's an understatement but that doesn't sound too good. It seems like you have had way more than your share of shit flung at you by life but it also seems like you're hanging in there. Without wanting to be patronising I really hope you get through this to a point where life is a bit more positive and enjoyable for you and you can start to look forward to things. PM me any time you want a chat. All the best mate. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RandomGuy. Posted March 29, 2014 Share Posted March 29, 2014 Apparently I had a massive panic/anxiety attack on Thursday, couldn't breathe, chest pains etc. Hospital took several hours to calm me down and get my pulse even close to 100 (was nearly 140 when I went in) So, I now have to get treatment and take meds for anxiety/stress. f**k this shit I'm like this every time I think about the upcoming Semi-Final I want to watch Hearts v Hibs tomorrow but seeing Tynecastle still gives me the fear 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sjc Posted March 29, 2014 Share Posted March 29, 2014 Apparently I had a massive panic/anxiety attack on Thursday, couldn't breathe, chest pains etc. Hospital took several hours to calm me down and get my pulse even close to 100 (was nearly 140 when I went in) So, I now have to get treatment and take meds for anxiety/stress. f**k this shit For the last 6 months I can relate to this...........Stick in there you'll get through this 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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