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Facts you made up


Mak

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To celebrate the 1st anniversary of the Indy Ref here's a fact for yous

Alex Salmon actually voted NO, he was playing truth or dare at the Govanhill swimming baths after his Pilates class with the rest of the class except Ruth Davison who had to leave early because she was on a course of antibiotics for some lady problems.

Anyway Wee Eck was given a dare to Vote No or to tell the truth about what happened at the last SNP Christmas party in the photocopying room with the banana & the lady serving the trifles. So he chose the dare.

Had he manned up about the trifle treacle incident then we would probably be free men & women now.

Grimbo

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In his younger days, revered playwright Alan Bennett would travel to seedy East End pubs in London to compete in unlicenced arm wrestling contests. In over 130 unsanctioned matches he never lost, nicknamed his right arm 'The Judge', and attributed his success to a strict diet of potted ham and up to 6 hard boiled eggs per day.

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Up until the reign of Queen Victoria it was the law that jigsaws were limited to a maximum of 90 pieces. Victoria, who was a keen jigsaw puzzler, decreed that with materials and technology improving, the maximum should be raised to 185. Upon her death and as a remembrance of her fondness for jigsaws, Parliament decided to abolish a maximum amount.

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The popular pub game pool(Or pocket billiards as it was originally known) was created by English toff Sir Walter de Courcy Kingsdale the 3rd in 1664, as a result of his traditionally royal peccadillo of buggering young stable lads and household helpers in the games room. After years of decrying his traditional billiards table as being "Too tall for it's true purpose", he had royal architect Thomas de Burgh create a smaller version more suitable to his needs.

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Following on from Ross's pocket billiard fact.

Snooker ball points for the colours originally was black 2 brown 3 yellow 4 green 5 blue 6 pink 7. It was only changed to it's current format when the equal opportunities & race relations PC brigade got involved in 1882 during the 1st outbreak of veganism & it coincided with the anti-slavery appeasement society.

Grimbo

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The full story about the "failed" ELO audition for SH's voice was that after 74 takes they finally managed to nail Mr Blue Sky & with the take in the can, SHV & Bev Bevan went on a 16 hour bender around all the salubrious pubs/clubs of Burmingum, the bar bill for the only club that did receipts in them days was £2684.34p a report from one of the bar staff present during the session claimed she'd never seen so much vodka & WD40 drunk in one night. Unfortunately the can with the take was left in one of the pubs & has never been seen since.

Bevan & SHV blamed each other & have never spoken to each other since. A sad loss to the music world but ultimately the gain for the world of science.

SHV went in to rehab a few months after Mr Blie Sky was released with the new voice dubbed in (rumour has It it's Gary Numan but as yet it's never been proven), since then SHV has never touched even a shot of WD40.

Grimbo

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