Bishop Briggs Posted August 1, 2021 Share Posted August 1, 2021 -7 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DeeTillEhDeh Posted August 2, 2021 Share Posted August 2, 2021 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Elric Posted August 3, 2021 Share Posted August 3, 2021 There are some horrible people about. I heard a cat crying outside and when I opened the door I saw four blokes in Celtic shirts playing football with it. I was just about to phone the RSPCA when the cat went 1-0 up. 17 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
George7 Posted August 5, 2021 Share Posted August 5, 2021 I met this chap at the Olympics and he was walking along with a long shaft on his shoulder "Excuse me "I said "But are you a Pole vaulter?" He replied "No I'm German but how did you know my name was Walter?" George 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scw1987 Posted August 5, 2021 Share Posted August 5, 2021 I met this chap at the Olympics and he was walking along with a long shaft on his shoulder "Excuse me "I said "But are you a Pole vaulter?" He replied "No I'm German but how did you know my name was Walter?" GeorgeYou've misspelled 'Chic' 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
buchan30 Posted August 5, 2021 Share Posted August 5, 2021 Speaking of the olympics. Been watching this guy, i think he’s magic. 9 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LincolnHearts Posted August 6, 2021 Share Posted August 6, 2021 A bloke is shagging his overweight girlfriend when the phone rings. ’You’ll have to phone me back mate’ he says. ‘I’m in the tub.’ 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
John Lambies Doos Posted August 7, 2021 Share Posted August 7, 2021 . 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted August 7, 2021 Share Posted August 7, 2021 Celtic and Rangers. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
welshbairn Posted August 8, 2021 Share Posted August 8, 2021 If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Granny Danger Posted August 8, 2021 Share Posted August 8, 2021 1 hour ago, welshbairn said: If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you. I used to go out with a parachutist with Irritable Bowel Syndrome, but she shat on me from a great height. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GordonD Posted August 8, 2021 Share Posted August 8, 2021 Blind man climbing aboard the plane wearing a parachute. Somebody asks him, "How do you know when you're about to land, so you can prepare yourself?" He replies, "I do it when the dug's lead goes slack." 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Duszek Posted August 9, 2021 Share Posted August 9, 2021 “Welcome, everyone, to Book Binding Club! Make yourself a tome.” 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Reggie Perrin Posted August 9, 2021 Share Posted August 9, 2021 On 05/08/2021 at 03:49, George7 said: I met this chap at the Olympics and he was walking along with a long shaft on his shoulder "Excuse me "I said "But are you a Pole vaulter?" He replied "No I'm German but how did you know my name was Walter?" George Chick Murray. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Twinkle Posted August 10, 2021 Share Posted August 10, 2021 Avoid the M6 today folks. Theres an overturned lorry which was carrying snooker equipment. Now theres cues in both directions 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hk blues Posted August 10, 2021 Share Posted August 10, 2021 16 minutes ago, Twinkle said: Avoid the M6 today folks. Theres an overturned lorry which was carrying snooker equipment. Now theres cues in both directions Balls. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bold Rover Posted August 10, 2021 Share Posted August 10, 2021 2 hours ago, Twinkle said: Avoid the M6 today folks. Theres an overturned lorry which was carrying snooker equipment. Now theres cues in both directions Just take a rest. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sugna Posted August 10, 2021 Share Posted August 10, 2021 2 hours ago, Twinkle said: Avoid the M6 today folks. Theres an overturned lorry which was carrying snooker equipment. Now theres cues in both directions Put it down to experience. Chalk. I mean chalk. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Silvio Tattiescone Posted August 10, 2021 Share Posted August 10, 2021 Put it down to chalk? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GordonD Posted August 10, 2021 Share Posted August 10, 2021 I watched the chaos from a bridge. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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