Fullerene Posted May 6, 2022 Share Posted May 6, 2022 15 hours ago, Oystercatcher said: In tennis Love is when you have nothing. Boris claimed to have to have nothing when actually he had something so now he is finding out about a new kind of love. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
microdave Posted May 6, 2022 Share Posted May 6, 2022 When he was told his sentence was two and a half years, Boris Becker asked the judge how many months that was. She replied "thirty love." 7 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hearthammer Posted May 9, 2022 Share Posted May 9, 2022 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tamthebam Posted May 12, 2022 Share Posted May 12, 2022 I wanted a job that would have women chasing after me So I became a bus driver 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Theroadlesstravelled Posted May 13, 2022 Share Posted May 13, 2022 When Beethoven passed away, he was buried in a churchyard. A couple days later, the town drunk was walking through the cemetery and heard some strange noise coming from the area where Beethoven was buried. Terrified, the drunk ran and got the priest to come and listen to it. The priest bent close to the grave and heard some faint, unrecognizable music coming from the grave. Frightened, the priest ran and got the town magistrate. When the magistrate arrived, he bent his ear to the grave, listened for a moment, and said, "Ah, yes, that's Beethoven's Ninth Symphony, being played backwards." He listened a while longer, and said, "There's the Eighth Symphony, and it's backwards, too. Most puzzling." So the magistrate kept listening; "There's the Seventh... the Sixth... the Fifth..." Suddenly the realization of what was happening dawned on the magistrate; he stood up and announced to the crowd that had gathered in the cemetery, "My fellow citizens, there's nothing to worry about. It's just Beethoven decomposing." 6 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post Shadow Play Posted May 13, 2022 Popular Post Share Posted May 13, 2022 20 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jagfox Posted May 18, 2022 Share Posted May 18, 2022 8 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JustOneCornetto Posted May 18, 2022 Share Posted May 18, 2022 I know a joke about Elton John It's a little bit funny... 9 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Arthur daley Posted May 18, 2022 Share Posted May 18, 2022 not done by myself but still belongs hear. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Silvio Tattiescone Posted May 18, 2022 Share Posted May 18, 2022 The wife got stuck in her jogging bottoms this morning. I had to perform an emergency trackybottomy. 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HI HAT Posted May 19, 2022 Share Posted May 19, 2022 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Arthur daley Posted May 19, 2022 Share Posted May 19, 2022 8 minutes ago, HI HAT said: Well It certainly wasn’t my arsehole nephew ray that’s for sure . 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Derry Alli Posted May 21, 2022 Share Posted May 21, 2022 6 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HI HAT Posted May 24, 2022 Share Posted May 24, 2022 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
carpetmonster Posted May 25, 2022 Share Posted May 25, 2022 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BillyAnchor Posted May 26, 2022 Share Posted May 26, 2022 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HI HAT Posted May 27, 2022 Share Posted May 27, 2022 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
carpetmonster Posted May 27, 2022 Share Posted May 27, 2022 7 minutes ago, oaksoft said: You've got a fucking nerve saying Gervais isn't funny and then coming out with that. If you're this desperate for any sort of attention can you not just buy a puppy or run down Sauchiehall Street in the scud or something? I tell you what - go quote this back on the cancel culture thread and don't shit all the other ones up too. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
buchan30 Posted May 27, 2022 Share Posted May 27, 2022 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
buchan30 Posted May 27, 2022 Share Posted May 27, 2022 10 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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