Brother Blades Posted July 14, 2019 Share Posted July 14, 2019 In Largs tonight, some poor guy called Lewis has received numerous phone calls in ten minutes, from his family who are sat near me:Call 1 - go to the chip shop buy eight fish suppers.Call 2 - go to the co-op and buy tomato ketchup.Call 3 - HAND SANITISER (shouting orders at him now)Call 4 - just leave the till and go and buy some drinks. Random cans. Just a selection for all. No just leave the till it won't take long.I'm so stressed listening to all of this, I fear Lewis will taste anger and resentment when he's allowed to sit down for his chips. ^^^ Lewis 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Le Tout P'ti FC Posted July 14, 2019 Share Posted July 14, 2019 ^^^ LewisI was a Lewis once and then I saw the emergency exit. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HenryHill Posted July 14, 2019 Share Posted July 14, 2019 27 minutes ago, Le Tout P'ti FC said: In Largs tonight, some poor guy called Lewis has received numerous phone calls in ten minutes, from his family who are sat near me: Call 1 - go to the chip shop buy eight fish suppers. Call 2 - go to the co-op and buy tomato ketchup. Call 3 - HAND SANITISER (shouting orders at him now) Call 4 - just leave the till and go and buy some drinks. Random cans. Just a selection for all. No just leave the till it won't take long. I'm so stressed listening to all of this, I fear Lewis will taste anger and resentment when he's allowed to sit down for his chips. Lewis from Largs, if your are reading this, put them all under the patio. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
#tedstriker Posted July 14, 2019 Share Posted July 14, 2019 When I’m watching something (football, darts, etc) and her phone rings.“Can you turn that down or pause it please? My mum’s phoning”Fucking go upstairs and talk to her FFS. I’m not pausing live sport [emoji36][emoji23] 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mizfit Posted July 14, 2019 Share Posted July 14, 2019 She’s never off her phone. Like never. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boghead ranter Posted July 14, 2019 Share Posted July 14, 2019 (edited) 38 minutes ago, mizfit said: She’s never off her phone. Like never. Is it on vibrate? Eh? EH? Edited July 14, 2019 by Boghead ranter 10 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gav-ffc Posted July 15, 2019 Share Posted July 15, 2019 14 hours ago, mizfit said: She’s never off her phone. Like never. Yet never answers when you phone. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest bernardblack Posted July 15, 2019 Share Posted July 15, 2019 She’s never off her phone. Like never. The second she puts it down after being on it all night though you’ll get the “you know you’re never off your phone...” 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dee Man Posted July 18, 2019 Author Share Posted July 18, 2019 We currently have a spray can of canola oil and a bottle of vegetable oil in the cupboard. She pulls out the spray can last night to fry some chicken and says, "I read the other day that these spray oils are bad for non-stick pans as the aerosol damages them and removes the non-stick material". **proceeds to spray oil directly onto non-stick pan** 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Melanius Mullarkey Posted July 18, 2019 Share Posted July 18, 2019 13 minutes ago, Dee Man said: We currently have a spray can of canola oil 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zen Archer (Raconteur) Posted July 18, 2019 Share Posted July 18, 2019 2 hours ago, MixuFixit said: Baffling American names for household goods thread for this pish. Rape seed oil. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cerberus Posted July 18, 2019 Share Posted July 18, 2019 Rape seed oil.Trust you to get all rapey. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stellaboz Posted July 18, 2019 Share Posted July 18, 2019 Brings a tear to the eye 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hedgecutter Posted July 21, 2019 Share Posted July 21, 2019 Her: "Can I try a bit of your food (that you picked from the menu)? Me: "Sure" [tastes it] Her: "Hmmm... it's ok, but I prefer mine" 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
M0rtonfc Posted July 22, 2019 Share Posted July 22, 2019 On 08/07/2019 at 10:02, throbber said: I have no idea how it ended up in the house, I actually think it was bought for us but it had very little to do with me. You were banging on yesterday to someone who is expecting a child in a few months time about how this was an essential piece of kit though and I disagreed, it doesn’t make me a hypocrite for having one I just think they’re over rated. It's a life saver for me, was brutal waiting for the milk to warm up while the wee man was having a meltdown at 2am! All hail the Tommy Tippee! 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JamesP_81 Posted July 27, 2019 Share Posted July 27, 2019 I came home from work late last night and fancied a snack so stuck a few slices of toast on. We have 3 whole loaves in the house plus 2 slices and a skiddly wee end bit from another loaf. Instead of opening up a fresh one I thought ill just finish that one off.Now to this morning, she is making breakfast and has decided that those specific 2 and a half slices of bread were integral to her whole breakfast plan which is now ruined, and has flown off the handle about how she can't leave anything in the house without me eating it! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HenryHill Posted July 27, 2019 Share Posted July 27, 2019 56 minutes ago, JamesP_81 said: I came home from work late last night and fancied a snack so stuck a few slices of toast on. We have 3 whole loaves in the house plus 2 slices and a skiddly wee end bit from another loaf. Instead of opening up a fresh one I thought ill just finish that one off. Now to this morning, she is making breakfast and has decided that those specific 2 and a half slices of bread were integral to her whole breakfast plan which is now ruined, and has flown off the handle about how she can't leave anything in the house without me eating it! Does she have a pet? If so, put it in a curry. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stellaboz Posted August 13, 2019 Share Posted August 13, 2019 Once or twice would be fine but she CONSISTENTLY mixes up he/she and him/her. Much to the point I'm genuinely infuriated.Talks about the new family kitten. A boy. Always "she is..." reminded hourly.Talks about a new Frida Monobrow exhibition in town, says something about "his history..."Give me strength. Left and right also hard at times apparently. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
staggy1929 Posted August 13, 2019 Share Posted August 13, 2019 I know I won't be the only one and it's probably been mentioned before. She'll spend ages on her phone, so I'll go on mine for about 2 minutes and get met with 'You're never off your phone, I'm here too you know?' 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
deej Posted August 13, 2019 Share Posted August 13, 2019 3 minutes ago, staggy1929 said: I know I won't be the only one and it's probably been mentioned before. She'll spend ages on her phone, so I'll go on mine for about 2 minutes and get met with 'You're never off your phone, I'm here too you know?' Yeah. iPad for me. Her phone is shite and has been for ages, so she isn't on it very often. This is something to be proud of apparently, but it's not so good when she needs to contact someone or google anything. "Can I just use your phone for a minute" f**k off and get a new phone 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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