Shandon Par Posted June 9, 2017 Share Posted June 9, 2017 [mention=40259]throbber[/mention] take no notice of him, i'll leave the back door key next to that bush you like to watch me tackle Mrs Par from. Dont wipe your knob on the soft furnishings, I almost got caught that way before, he loves his soft furnishings.... I wondered what those cocktail stick shaped marks at knee height to a normal person on the curtains were. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bobby Skidmarks Posted June 9, 2017 Share Posted June 9, 2017 4 hours ago, throbber said: I leave my charger next to my side of the bed and charge it at night and she still goes into the room from time to time and turns the plug off at the wall. She did it not too long ago and I had to go out to work with little charge on my phone. These sort of exchanges are pretty standard for us: 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DI Bruce Robertson Posted June 9, 2017 Share Posted June 9, 2017 Brilliant! 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sergeant Wilson Posted June 9, 2017 Share Posted June 9, 2017 Just now, DI Bruce Robertson said: Brilliant! I bet you wouldn't mind putting up with Moira's infuriating habits again. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
throbber Posted June 9, 2017 Share Posted June 9, 2017 Good one Rab. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest bernardblack Posted June 9, 2017 Share Posted June 9, 2017 Recycling is a big one in our house. I go to stick something in the bin "we need to recycle that!!lRecycling means leaving something near the bin until we need to tidy extensively again for someone dropping by for 30secs and it goes in the original bin. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sergeant Wilson Posted June 9, 2017 Share Posted June 9, 2017 10 minutes ago, bernardblack said: Recycling is a big one in our house. I go to stick something in the bin "we need to recycle that!!l Recycling means leaving something near the bin until we need to tidy extensively again for someone dropping by for 30secs and it goes in the original bin. We do this. Bought compost, bark etc for the garden. I found all the plastic bags in the garden waste bin. In a surprising juxtaposition I often find the flowers I bought her in the recycling bin. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cerberus Posted June 9, 2017 Share Posted June 9, 2017 My burd refuses to wear an Alan Archibald mask during sex. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Slacker Posted June 9, 2017 Share Posted June 9, 2017 8 hours ago, throbber said: I argued my case for her for a while but she wasn't budging and then hung up on me as i was mid sentence. I'm a fucking seething mess when this happens to me. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
welshbairn Posted June 9, 2017 Share Posted June 9, 2017 24 minutes ago, Slacker said: I'm a fucking seething mess when this happens to me. I just went ahead and bought what I want. I'm single. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sergeant Wilson Posted June 9, 2017 Share Posted June 9, 2017 6 minutes ago, welshbairn said: I just went ahead and bought what I want. I'm single. ...and go on holiday with yer Maw. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
welshbairn Posted June 9, 2017 Share Posted June 9, 2017 3 minutes ago, Sergeant Wilson said: ...and go on holiday with yer Maw. Aye. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sergeant Wilson Posted June 9, 2017 Share Posted June 9, 2017 Just now, welshbairn said: Aye. Use it to your advantage. You'll look like a caring individual. Get the old trumpet to bed shortly after dinner and the world's your oxter. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
welshbairn Posted June 9, 2017 Share Posted June 9, 2017 (edited) 5 minutes ago, Sergeant Wilson said: Use it to your advantage. You'll look like a caring individual. Get the old trumpet to bed shortly after dinner and the world's your oxter. Will do. Hoping to meet up with my axe murderer friend as well to see how he's doing. Edited June 9, 2017 by welshbairn 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zen Archer (Raconteur) Posted June 9, 2017 Share Posted June 9, 2017 11 minutes ago, Sergeant Wilson said: ...and go on holiday with yer Maw. 8 minutes ago, welshbairn said: Aye. You could take her to the theatre. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sergeant Wilson Posted June 9, 2017 Share Posted June 9, 2017 Just now, welshbairn said: Will do. Hoping to meet up with my axe murderer friend as well to see how he's doing. Will post a pic if possible discretely. Reminds me of the old joke. Guy on a cruise is offered a mother and daughter threesome by a well turned out 50ish woman, he agrees and follows her back to the cabin. She opens the door and shouts...Maw, are you up? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
welshbairn Posted June 9, 2017 Share Posted June 9, 2017 4 minutes ago, Zen Archer said: You could take her to the theatre. My sister and niece are coming as well. My job is to see she gets on and off the plane and getting her to her hotel room. Then I'm off to France on the ferry. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dindeleux Posted June 9, 2017 Share Posted June 9, 2017 My missus is pretty good at the tidying up but sometimes needs some motivation so I do this - Dindeleux (about an hour before work): I'll help you tidy this house up at the weekend eh? Her: ok Dindeleux (About 5 mins before work): are you just going to sit here and watch the wean sleeping all day? It would be nice if you could do something. Her - silence Then, and it works like a charm every time, about 5 hours later I get a text saying "you'll be glad to know I've done X, Y, Z bla bla bla.....the house is tidy, remember I'm not your fucking cleaner" I then reply with "sorry I didn't mean it to come across like you were the only person who has to tidy up" Now tomorrow I can just lie about all day. -1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gaz FFC Posted June 10, 2017 Share Posted June 10, 2017 On 6/8/2017 at 20:49, 2lgm said: We have an open plan staircase into the living room so she always sits at the top of the stairs drying her hair when I'm watching the telly. Plenty of sockets and large wardrobe mirror in the bedroom for doing the hair. Hoover when I'm watching telly. Panics if I drive over 50 mph on a motorway and she thinks all other drivers are on the road with the intention of crashing into us. Thinks I'm her gofer. Constant bloody soaps on the telly yet one game of football and I'm hogging it all week. Thinks making dinner consists of having a pizza in the fridge for me to heat up when I get home. Expects breakfast made every weekend, in bed too if she isn't up. I hope this is fake. if it isn't I seriously suggest getting some self esteem. Unless of course she's an amazing ride and you're willing to overlook everything else 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
throbber Posted June 10, 2017 Share Posted June 10, 2017 Does she also forget your log in details for P&B? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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