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Boy in my work messaged my manager to say I’m incompetent and should either be retrained or sacked.

Apparently he’s got previous of doing this to others. Not sure if I should issue a pie booting or wait until he makes a mistake and call him out.
Tell everyone in the office about it. He will look like a dick and nobody will trust him.
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Every morning a lassie at my work heats up her cinnamon porridge in the microwave, when she decides it's hot enough she'll take it out of the microwave and doesn't reset the timer, annoys me a lot more than it probably should. 

Also, challenge him to see if he can throw a kettle over a pub 

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Boy in my work messaged my manager to say I’m incompetent and should either be retrained or sacked.

Apparently he’s got previous of doing this to others. Not sure if I should issue a pie booting or wait until he makes a mistake and call him out.

It’s time like these you need to ask yourself the question, would you beat him in a fight?
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Boy in my work messaged my manager to say I’m incompetent and should either be retrained or sacked.

Apparently he’s got previous of doing this to others. Not sure if I should issue a pie booting or wait until he makes a mistake and call him out.
cant believe you are asking on here. bang his puss and do it infront of the entire office so they all know what a sleekit b*****d he is.
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3 hours ago, Steven Mill Out said:

Old bloke that sits in the corner of my office has just received an official warning for farting. Pleasing times.

He's not taking it well.

For what it's worth, he's also an absolute c**t and one of the hardest people to cooperate with that I have come across.

Despite the fact he's a c**t. Surely you can't be warned for farting?

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50 minutes ago, mizfit said:

Boy in my work messaged my manager to say I’m incompetent and should either be retrained or sacked.

Apparently he’s got previous of doing this to others. Not sure if I should issue a pie booting or wait until he makes a mistake and call him out.

Sounds to me like you've SHAT IT you incompetent arsepiece!

 

Sorry, harsh but fair!

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Sounds to me like you've SHAT IT you incompetent arsepiece!
 
Sorry, harsh but fair!
This. It could be too late to recover this situation, but even if its not, the bleaching you have to dish out here to salvage any form of credibility is getting more severe by the minute.

Times a wasting brother.

I recently had the snip, and currently you would be second to me in a manliness contest
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10 minutes ago, Bairnardo said:

This. It could be too late to recover this situation, but even if its not, the bleaching you have to dish out here to salvage any form of credibility is getting more severe by the minute.

Times a wasting brother.

I recently had the snip, and currently you would be second to me in a manliness contest

Aye he's blew it, worst thing for him now is that word gets around the office that he's filled his nappy and that the other guy who's obviously a total knobend comes out of this looking like the big man with balls of steel!

I pitty the fool!

 

Edited by M0rtonfc
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21 minutes ago, Busta Nut said:

Despite the fact he's a c**t. Surely you can't be warned for farting?

I'm sure its a thing.  Like I've worked in places where people have been warned for absolutely fucking reeking of BO.  Pretty sure it falls under the 'must be dressed appropriately for work' part of your contract.  As in 'look smart and have a wash every morning'.

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1 minute ago, TheScarf said:

I'm sure its a thing.  Like I've worked in places where people have been warned for absolutely fucking reeking of BO.  Pretty sure it falls under the 'must be dressed appropriately for work' part of your contract.  As in 'look smart and have a wash every morning'.

First thing I'd do is get an appointment with the doc, complain about my smelly bowels. Get a note from them and go into work farting like f**k.

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I'm sure its a thing.  Like I've worked in places where people have been warned for absolutely fucking reeking of BO.  Pretty sure it falls under the 'must be dressed appropriately for work' part of your contract.  As in 'look smart and have a wash every morning'.


Had this at my work last year. This big girl who moved into our team about 6 months beforehand and was completely fine, all of a sudden one day absolutely reeked of fish (aye it was coming from down south) which stayed for months. She’s got severe anxiety or something which is why she was moved into our team in the first place. It got so bad that one day I walked down the canteen which is separated to our office by a hallway, and I could tell that she had been there. Complaints from the boss were taken however nothing was done for about 9 months. 9 months of coming in to do a shift and smelling fishy fanny. If it was one of my colleagues I was closer to I would obviously have just told them, however I think if anyone had actually said to her she’d have burst out into tears in the middle of an office full of hundreds of people.

After finally being told off for it, it went away for a good while but it’s been coming back. To be continued.

IMG_1193.jpg
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8 minutes ago, Senor Bairn said:

She also brings in a large biscuit tin of ‘salad’ which contains slices of ham, pickled onions, and cheese, and eats this at her desk. But that’s the least of my concerns at the moment x

Classic fat person salad that, half a pack of wafer thin ham and loads of cheese mixed in with some greens with a few Rivita's on the side.

Guy who's in my team is a big unit, he was on a salad diet for a bit, I sat with him one lunch, he had a big tub, whipped it open and I was impressed with how healthy it looked until he cracked open a sauce to put on it then proceeded to devour a packet of crisps and a mars bar, can't argue, at least he's trying!

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51 minutes ago, Busta Nut said:

Despite the fact he's a c**t. Surely you can't be warned for farting?

He lifts a cheek to release, this is not a typical old man "it just eeked oot" kind of fart. There are visible signs of pushing on his face and eventual relief once it is gone. 

Don't like seeing people lose a job, but his days are numbered and it's probably for the best.

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26 minutes ago, Senor Bairn said:

 


Had this at my work last year. This big girl who moved into our team about 6 months beforehand and was completely fine, all of a sudden one day absolutely reeked of fish (aye it was coming from down south) which stayed for months. She’s got severe anxiety or something which is why she was moved into our team in the first place. It got so bad that one day I walked down the canteen which is separated to our office by a hallway, and I could tell that she had been there. Complaints from the boss were taken however nothing was done for about 9 months. 9 months of coming in to do a shift and smelling fishy fanny. If it was one of my colleagues I was closer to I would obviously have just told them, however I think if anyone had actually said to her she’d have burst out into tears in the middle of an office full of hundreds of people.

After finally being told off for it, it went away for a good while but it’s been coming back. To be continued.

IMG_1193.jpg

 

Hate to say it (or actually, not that bothered since I don't have to work with her) but fish odour syndrome is a genuine ailment ...

https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/trimethylaminuria/

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