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C**** on Holiday


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One time in Prague we stayed in a swanky hotel. The restaurant downstairs tried to cater for all tastes, and you could actually get a decent cup of tea (i.e. not a glass of luke-warm water with a tea bag + slice of lemon on the side). You could even fashion together a fry-up from their eggs, sausages, toast, mushrooms etc (no tattie scones or black pudding obviously). 

They mixed things up a wee bit every day. One day we went down to be greeted by a bowl of Brussel Sprouts with bits of bacon... gave it a bash ... lovely stuff. It certainly wasn't a Czech dish (or indeed any country's dish) but it kinda worked. 

All they were missing was milk cubes. 

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A c**t is a c**t whether the c**t is on holiday or not but the biggest c**t move on a holiday I can think of are the lads who pretend to be footballers to get their hole. Normally from some shitehole town in England trying it on about being in Man Utd's reserves & how they're gonna be big. Shite patter.

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When I was in Prague we went to the same place for breakfast every day. My mates were firing into some full cooked breakfast, but I couldn't face that. It was quite a nice restaurant though, and (bizarrely) was serving chicken consomme from 11am each day. It was properly made and really nice. I would get a bowl of it, and sip the chickeny goodness until my hangover abated.

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2 minutes ago, xNicola_Ghirl1888x said:

A c**t is a c**t whether the c**t is on holiday or not but the biggest c**t move on a holiday I can think of are the lads who pretend to be footballers to get their hole. Normally from some shitehole town in England trying it on about being in Man Utd's reserves & how they're gonna be big. Shite patter.

Did Ched not phone you back?

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2 minutes ago, Tynieness said:

I mind the time I pumped this thick Sellick supporting burd after I claimed to be a footballer.  

Had to put on a Manc accent to make it convincing and seal the deal.

She had the last laugh though. Syphilis is a c**t.

Better than your first effort :lol:

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41 minutes ago, kilbowie2002 said:

Once made the rookie mistake of going to a 'scottish restaurant' in Boston, they advertised that they did a Scottish breakfast including square sausage and 'tattie scones'. It was fucking awful, the square sausage was pork, and the tattie scones hadnt even slept with a tottie. The bacon was yon disgusting american crap but really thick, just generally crap. All these yanks going 'oh i love how authentic it is' etc etc, utterly shite, stuck to pancakes after that.  Took a picture for reference.

What pisses me off about that horror show is that Americans will eat it, and then spend the rest of their lives boring every fucker in a hundred mile radius about how terrible "British" food is. 

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17 minutes ago, kilbowie2002 said:

They put that Scottish staple pineapple on the right.

Pineapple / Thistle. Depending on the illustration on the tin, it's an easy mistake to make. 

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15 minutes ago, kilbowie2002 said:


They put that Scottish staple pineapple on the right. The brown squares are the alleged tottie scones which had chives inside. The monstrosity on the left is the square sausage.

You at the wind up? No Scottish breakfast is complete without a nice big bit of grilled pineapple. :lol:

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12 minutes ago, kilbowie2002 said:


I dont normally leave negative trip advisor reviews but i felt the food was so bad in this place that I had to state just how unauthentic and nothing like true Scottish food it really was. I think we do breakfast really well in Scotland, the worst thing about this is the owners of the restaurant are apparently Scottish. Also the only soft drinks they served was Irn Bru. Its called the Haven, its in Jamaica Plain Boston, menu sounds so much better than it really is.

Just had a swatch at their menu. 

The words 'Scottish Poutine' have already rustled my jimmies as poutine is French Canadian.  That's before reading the description. 

Chips, Cotswold Cheddar and Marmite gravy..... f**k this life. 

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3 minutes ago, djchapsticks said:

Just had a swatch at their menu. 

The words 'Scottish Poutine' have already rustled my jimmies as poutine is French Canadian.  That's before reading the description. 

Chips, Cotswold Cheddar and Marmite gravy..... f**k this life. 

'The Full Scotch Breakfast' :lol:

Spoiler

Batard toast

Spoiler

great banter

 

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42 minutes ago, djchapsticks said:

Just had a swatch at their menu. 

The words 'Scottish Poutine' have already rustled my jimmies as poutine is French Canadian.  That's before reading the description. 

Chips, Cotswold Cheddar and Marmite gravy..... f**k this life. 

As a native of Quebec I am deeply offended by this idea.  Poutine is not a complicated venture, it needs fries (chips), cheese curds, and gravy.  It's sometimes acceptable to add some sort of meat to that such as bacon, or slightly modify the gravy (such as pepper gravy) but as soon as you remove the cheese curds and put different gravy on then it's no longer a true poutine.  

And it being served in a Scottish Restaurant in Boston just makes it worse

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8 hours ago, kilbowie2002 said:


They put that Scottish staple pineapple on the right. The brown squares are the alleged tottie scones which had chives inside. The monstrosity on the left is the square sausage.

https://www.google.co.uk/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=2&cad=rja&uact=8&ved=0ahUKEwiGyLvUjYjVAhVLBsAKHQr4DVQQtwIIKzAB&url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.youtube.com%2Fwatch%3Fv%3DBtb7TVZt7QA&usg=AFQjCNHC_zv3Sqp2oZOG5FjkOwUdlmPxrA

 

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A c**t is a c**t whether the c**t is on holiday or not but the biggest c**t move on a holiday I can think of are the lads who pretend to be footballers to get their hole. Normally from some shitehole town in England trying it on about being in Man Utd's reserves & how they're gonna be big. Shite patter.


^^^ naively fell for it.
I used to use this same trick as s young man on holiday to mixed effect. Also used to pretend I was Duncan Ferguson's wee brother but that only seemed to impress guys and not women..,
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11 hours ago, kilbowie2002 said:

Once made the rookie mistake of going to a 'scottish restaurant' in Boston, they advertised that they did a Scottish breakfast including square sausage and 'tattie scones'. It was fucking awful, the square sausage was pork, and the tattie scones hadnt even slept with a tottie. The bacon was yon disgusting american crap but really thick, just generally crap. All these yanks going 'oh i love how authentic it is' etc etc, utterly shite, stuck to pancakes after that. 4de7f368d5e62400a03db6bf36524399.jpg Took a picture for reference.

Fucking hell. That looks like someone has removed the organs of a leper and put them on a plate. Absolute boak material there.

Also it's missing some black pudding (I shudder to think of their attempt at that!) and beans.

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