Benjamin_Nevis Posted June 26, 2019 Share Posted June 26, 2019 I was definitely an adult before I realised that news reports of "A 35 year old man is helping police with their enquiries" didn't mean that some publicly-spirited 35 year man had wandered into the police station to see if there was anything he could do to help. ^^^ helped police with their enquiries at the age of 35 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GordonD Posted June 26, 2019 Share Posted June 26, 2019 40 minutes ago, Hedgecutter said: I was in a B&B in Conwy and selected 'Welsh rarebit' on the breakfast form the night before, having no idea what it was. Perhaps I was just overly excited about trying some new exciting-sounding cuisine, but you can imagine my disappointment when I was given cheese on f***ing toast for breakfast. You'd have been even more disappointed if supermik had been staying there as well - it would just have been the toast. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
paranoid android Posted June 26, 2019 Author Share Posted June 26, 2019 8 hours ago, GordonD said: You missed out the most obvious clue of the lot: Shut it, you! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
paranoid android Posted June 26, 2019 Author Share Posted June 26, 2019 Genuinely embarrassed that I didn't see the St Mirren/Goodwin thing coming, btw - it was so obvious. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ebanda's Handyman Services Posted June 26, 2019 Share Posted June 26, 2019 I once read in FHM that women were right into confident men. Armed with this fail-proof information, I told this barmaid that I had my eye on that she fancied me. She didn't fancy me and I still cringe 20-odd years on at her reaction. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The DA Posted June 26, 2019 Share Posted June 26, 2019 6 hours ago, carpetmonster said: It's Enid Blyton-speak for a backpack. Whit? Haversack is blytonian for a urethra? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
carpetmonster Posted June 26, 2019 Share Posted June 26, 2019 Whit? Haversack is blytonian for a urethra?Timmy the dog always enjoyed it when Julian spread lashings of peanut butter over his haversack and whistled for him. So did Julian. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Moomintroll Posted June 26, 2019 Share Posted June 26, 2019 Timmy the dog always enjoyed it when Julian spread lashings of peanut butter over his haversack and whistled for him. So did Julian. Dick loved it more. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Willie adie Posted June 26, 2019 Share Posted June 26, 2019 My missus for years thought Freddie Starr was Bobby Davros dad. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boghead ranter Posted June 26, 2019 Share Posted June 26, 2019 15 minutes ago, Moomintroll said: 17 minutes ago, carpetmonster said: Timmy the dog always enjoyed it when Julian spread lashings of peanut butter over his haversack and whistled for him. So did Julian. Dick loved it more. Not as much as Aunt Fanny. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The DA Posted June 26, 2019 Share Posted June 26, 2019 10 minutes ago, Willie adie said: My missus for years thought Freddie Starr was Bobby Davros dad. He's not? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Melanius Mullarkey Posted June 26, 2019 Share Posted June 26, 2019 5 minutes ago, The DA said: He's not? No. He’s his mum. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Moomintroll Posted June 26, 2019 Share Posted June 26, 2019 No. He’s his mum.Your mum's your mum. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fullerene Posted June 26, 2019 Share Posted June 26, 2019 5 hours ago, RockMusic said: The correct expression is welsh rabbit. Rarebit was added by toffs who didn't want to be associated with cheap rabbit meat. Welsh was added to nouns to mean a cheap or poor version of something ie: using your fingers to straighten your hair was using a welsh comb. Cheese was seen as a poor substitute for meat (rabbit, or otherwise), hence the name welsh rabbit. On a similar idea, many people think lunch is an abbreviated form of luncheon. Again, this is wrong - toffs wanted to make boring old lunch sound posher and created the ridiculous luncheon. For me, the terms toffs and posh describes people who vote Tory, send their children to private schools, have a chateau in Switzerland, a timeshare in the Maldives, executive membership to the local golf club, regular visits to some club that still debates whether women can be members, tributes to whoever has just been born and is ninety-seventh to the throne, still getting Christmas cards from the laird of some estate that represents the dukedom of some county that no longer since regionalism. Now you are saying it simply boils down to how you describe your cheese on toast. Mind-blowing! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
carpetmonster Posted June 26, 2019 Share Posted June 26, 2019 My missus for years thought Freddie Starr was Bobby Davros dad.Bobby Davros was a porn Dr Who pastiche Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chicken Wing Posted June 26, 2019 Share Posted June 26, 2019 For me, the terms toffs and posh describes people who vote Tory, send their children to private schools, have a chateau in Switzerland, a timeshare in the Maldives, executive membership to the local golf club, regular visits to some club that still debates whether women can be members, tributes to whoever has just been born and is ninety-seventh to the throne, still getting Christmas cards from the laird of some estate that represents the dukedom of some county that no longer since regionalism. Now you are saying it simply boils down to how you describe your cheese on toast. Mind-blowing!CHOOSE LIFE! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
paranoid android Posted June 26, 2019 Author Share Posted June 26, 2019 I used to think Sound & Vision by David Bowie and I Love the Sound of Breaking Glass by Nick Lowe were the same song. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zen Archer (Raconteur) Posted June 26, 2019 Share Posted June 26, 2019 14 hours ago, RockMusic said: I was in my thirties before realising that the correct lyrics to the well known Christmas carol were: "Good King Wenceslas looked out" and not what I'd thought for years: "Good King Wencelas last looked out" This is similar to the well known ditty 'Lord of the Dance' where it's quite easy to misinterpret the line 'I am the Lord of the Dance, said he' as 'I am the Lord of the brown settee' Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bud1876 Posted June 26, 2019 Share Posted June 26, 2019 When I got my first PC I didnt know what copy and paste was... didnt even know it existed.I would spend ages typing out a link.Can remember sitting cursing the longer links... especially if they didnt work.Cant remember how long it took me to realise, but it was quite a while.Now I work every day online with my own business. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheGreenElves Posted June 27, 2019 Share Posted June 27, 2019 Realising that the singer Flo Rida took his name from where he's from (Florida if you haven't worked it out ) My mate : I wonder where Flo Rida is from(sarcastically) Me : How the f**k should I know? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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