xbl Posted August 30, 2007 Share Posted August 30, 2007 Why!? Well Ive been keeping it a trimmed goatee for the last few months, but I decided to go through with it tonight to surprise my work (its probably my last ever day tomorrow)...and I had a plan! I was gonna shave the goatee off, but keep a long drooping moustache. Unfortunately, said moustache made me look gayer than a gaylord in gayland, so that had to go. So now I sit here, clean shaven, with a large chunk of my chin whiter than a pint of milk and looking somewhat feminine. Im going nowhere until it grows back. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andy Dufresne Posted August 30, 2007 Share Posted August 30, 2007 Well Ive been keeping it a trimmed goatee for the last few months, but I decided to go through with it tonight to surprise my work (its probably my last ever day tomorrow)...and I had a plan!I was gonna shave the goatee off, but keep a long drooping moustache. Unfortunately, said moustache made me look gayer than a gaylord in gayland, so that had to go. So now I sit here, clean shaven, with a large chunk of my chin whiter than a pint of milk and looking somewhat feminine. Im going nowhere until it grows back. You will be telling us next that you have had a haircut as well. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Larbert_Par Posted August 31, 2007 Share Posted August 31, 2007 f**k. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
An Sionnach Posted August 31, 2007 Share Posted August 31, 2007 Had a nightmare last night, fell out of bed and have a bruised arse and a gashed forehead where I hit the bedside cabinet. Feckin full moon - it's power is too much for me! Full Moon energy is used for banishing unwanted influences in your life; protection magick; and divination. Planning, releasing, and working backwards in time are done on the full moon as well.It is said theat the best Full Moon magick can be conjured for seven days: the three days prior to the Full Moon, the night of the Full Moon itself, and three days after the Full Moon. Sometimes the results of Full Moon magick can take approximately one moon cycle to take hold and come to completion. The Full Moon is the time to invoke the Mother Goddess at the height of her glory, this is when the ceremony called "Drawing Down the Moon" is performed. During this ceremony the energy and essence of the Full Moon is drawn into oneself, when done properly you will feel a heightened trance state combined with a power surge that radiates through your whole body. Traditionally this is only done within a protective circle*. (*I have no protective circle, hence I'm vulnerable to the moon's bad influences - I can't channel it's power on my own, thus the negative forces are dominant). The Mother is the ripeness of womanhood, the boiling pot of Badb which is the richness of life. Her color is red, the color of blood and the life force. The Mother is Summer, the day, lustiness, teacher, The Full Moon Also Mrs Kilt has her birthday tomorrow but 'has other plans'. So I've been granted a half-hour visit on Sunday from her to hand over my presents. I'm hoping the four diamond and three blue sapphire eternity ring will win her over. No son though - he's oot with his pals - and no daughter either - she's staying back at the flat. Faaaaaaaaarrrrrrkkk! 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Adam_Wee Posted August 31, 2007 Share Posted August 31, 2007 Also Mrs Kilt has her birthday tomorrow but 'has other plans'. So I've been granted a half-hour visit on Sunday from her to hand over my presents. I'm hoping the four diamond and three blue sapphire eternity ring will win her over. No son though - he's oot with his pals - and no daughter either - she's staying back at the flat. Faaaaaaaaarrrrrrkkk! Kilt, isn't your wife blind? Why didn't you just get her a cheap piece of shite from Argos and palm it off as being what you bought? Yes, before anyone says it, that is EXACTLY what I would do. I am a horrible person though, so it's OK. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monster Posted August 31, 2007 Share Posted August 31, 2007 Kilt, isn't your wife blind? Why didn't you just get her a cheap piece of shite from Argos and palm it off as being what you bought?Yes, before anyone says it, that is EXACTLY what I would do. I am a horrible person though, so it's OK. Not as terrible a person as me, though. When I read Mrs. Kilt has 'other plans' I immediately jumped to the conclusion she has got another man. I'm an awful person really. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Adam_Wee Posted August 31, 2007 Share Posted August 31, 2007 Not as terrible a person as me, though.When I read Mrs. Kilt has 'other plans' I immediately jumped to the conclusion she has got another man. I'm an awful person really. Perhaps she has? I was going to say something else there, but it is a bit inapprioate 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monster Posted August 31, 2007 Share Posted August 31, 2007 Perhaps she has? I was going to say something else there, but it is a bit inapprioate Don't say it then. I'm already saddened by my own thoughts. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest The Phoenix Posted August 31, 2007 Share Posted August 31, 2007 Pubic hairs on the toilet seat in the office bogs. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RH33 Posted August 31, 2007 Share Posted August 31, 2007 Being stuck in all day waiting for a delivery to be picked up, people to come fix my door and a delivery to be dropped off. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
An Sionnach Posted August 31, 2007 Share Posted August 31, 2007 Kilt, isn't your wife blind? Why didn't you just get her a cheap piece of shite from Argos and palm it off as being what you bought? She's blind, Adam, not stupid. She'd recognise some cheap Ratner's style shite in seconds. Besides, I'm not a cheapskate and I'm hoping this gesture on her 40th, shite, 21st again, 21st, will go a long way to mending our relationship. Not as terrible a person as me, though.When I read Mrs. Kilt has 'other plans' I immediately jumped to the conclusion she has got another man. I'm an awful person really. To quote her own words 'I've had one relationship. What makes you think I'd ever want another?!' And yes, you are awful... ...but I like you! 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monster Posted August 31, 2007 Share Posted August 31, 2007 To quote her own words 'I've had one relationship. What makes you think I'd ever want another?!' What the hell did you do to the poor wumman? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
An Sionnach Posted August 31, 2007 Share Posted August 31, 2007 What the hell did you do to the poor wumman? Where do you want me to start..... Kept drinking when she asked me not to... Didn't listen to her... Took her too much for granted... Put personal pleasure and football above our relationship... Fucked her off big style... Men are such arses at times! 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monster Posted August 31, 2007 Share Posted August 31, 2007 Where do you want me to start.....Kept drinking when she asked me not to... Didn't listen to her... Took her too much for granted... Put personal pleasure and football above our relationship... Fucked her off big style... Men are such arses at times! If that's the criterion for a split, I'm in trouble. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
An Sionnach Posted August 31, 2007 Share Posted August 31, 2007 If that's the criterion for a split, I'm in trouble. So I gather! 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monster Posted August 31, 2007 Share Posted August 31, 2007 So I gather! When arguing, best not to respond to the accusation that one puts Ayr United above ones family in the affirmative. And then add 'So?'. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest The Phoenix Posted August 31, 2007 Share Posted August 31, 2007 If that's the criterion for a split, I'm in trouble. Me, you and 99% of other married men, I would suggest. Perhaps supporting Berwick Rangers was the straw that broke....... etc etc 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
saints1884 Posted August 31, 2007 Share Posted August 31, 2007 Where do you want me to start.....Kept drinking when she asked me not to... Didn't listen to her... Took her too much for granted... Put personal pleasure and football above our relationship... Fucked her off big style... Men are such arses at times! How is going to football a bad thing when it comes to relationships Could you not have taken Mrs Kilt with you. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bluetooner Posted August 31, 2007 Share Posted August 31, 2007 How is going to football a bad thing when it comes to relationships Could you not have taken Mrs Kilt with you. Naivety, Stupidity or taking the piss? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
saints1884 Posted August 31, 2007 Share Posted August 31, 2007 Naivety, Stupidity or taking the piss? None of the above. At least if Mrs Kilt was with him at the football she might have kept him in line and he wouldn't be living on his own right now. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.