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Petty Things That Get On Your Nerves...


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Aye, fireworks are totally pish.

I seen an incredible display when I lived in Perth (Australia, no Tayside) to be fair but here I find the displays incredibly dull. Bright lights and loud noises, woopty fucking do.

You are well travelled then, off you f**k.

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I have a wee crack in a tooth that i can't stop putting my tongue into and its sharp and hurts to lick it

I had this twenty years ago with one of my teeth; hurt like a b*****d whenever I touched the crack with my nail. Told my alcoholic dentist about it, and his sage advice was to "stop fucking touching it, then". In fairness to the old soak (RIP), it's never given me a problem since then.

Just gave it a quick poke for old times' sake, and jumped out of my skin like a cat with a firecracker up its arse :wacko:

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Got the subway from Buchanan St after walking my mate's lad towards his bus stop.

On subway usual shite, cuntz doubling over themselves via the hold bars.

Got to destination, no bother. Drinks ordered, cunto offering a cubicle for some reason. I reposted I've not had much luck for a while but I'm not gay.

Anyway, a mind head later I order my pizza for the road.

No bother but when I get out some ginger w**k stain I was talking to along with his dad wants a go.

I can't fight sleep so tried to work around their aggression.

Eventually I said get your cheese n chips you ginger wanks and I'll happily wait for my pizza :(

Nice pizza but fucking swampy rots

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I don't have Facebook but have been told that there's a Kilmarnock fan who looks like Ruth Davidson and a Thistle fan who is a borderline alcoholic who walks his dog in Kelvingrove Park every morning and posts weather updates. I've always imagined the latter is jagfox.

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Carrying something heavy and no c**t moves out your way on the pavement. They were going to walk down the middle and expect everyone else to get out their way, no matter what.

Humanity is just a collection of self-obsessed arseholes.

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Carrying something heavy and no c**t moves out your way on the pavement. They were going to walk down the middle and expect everyone else to get out their way, no matter what.

Humanity is just a collection of self-obsessed arseholes.

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FFS, I wasn't angry, I never got my hole and I never had a Big Mac. :lol:

There's quite a lot of bellends on here going around giving it big licks and yesterday was just one of the days I couldn't be arsed with it.

That's all there is to it, honest.

Mate if she'd rather have a McDonald's than shag , you have a problem. Brush up on your technique and the last thing that'll cross her mind is fucking McDonald's.

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Mate if she'd rather have a McDonald's than shag , you have a problem. Brush up on your technique and the last thing that'll cross her mind is fucking McDonald's.

She could combine both and stick a 'Filet o Fish' up her crack.

Edited by Bigmouth Strikes Again
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This is starting to remind me of the lassie who traded sexual favours for KFC.

Was that a thread on here, or another dream like the one where Biggie and Moz put their differences aside and wrestled in front of the open fire? :unsure:

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