Fullerene

I asked the same question until I realized it was the fire alarm.

Some people would say this is a reason to be out of the EU as well - since the EU outnumber us by 100 to 1 (or only 92 to 1 after Brexit).

"On a grim day in a grim month of a grim year, I walked down a grim street in a grim town under a grim sky. Of course, it had not always been so grim. But I get grim just thinking about those less grim days, so I grimly accept my grim lot and grimly soldier on." That was start of my novel "A Grim Tale" but I never got any further.

Yeah. Nostalgia is crap but I can remember when it wasn't.

Pay attention when they show you all the dents and scratches on the car. They get very suspicious of anyone that actually trusts them on stuff like that.

I remember watching "Football Focus" or whatever it was called one Saturday afternoon and the announcer calmly mentioned that the game between Bradford and Lincoln City had been interrupted because of a fire in the stand. It turned out to be a lot more serious than that.

Here is 3 blasts from the past - all in one. 1. The Twilight Zone 2. Really basic special effects 3. Black and White TV. I remember watching the Twlight Zone. Rod Serling would be talking to the audience and everybody else would act as if he wasn't there. I used to wonder how they were able to do that. I think I understand now.

Bad idea. The aliens would probably say "Hey the beer here is crap. Let's go to Neptune." They would probably get there in about three seconds while you would take 6 years to get across. Could be embarassing.

He has given hope and inspiration to men with bad hair cuts that maybe one day they can be somebody too. On that note, I wonder when he going to meet with Kim Jong Un.

I am not so sure. A four year old might not know that you have to press the button first or you have to wait for the light to turn red for the traffic before you cross. Also, some drivers are just plain stupid and do not slow down when they get near a pelican crossing - and maybe they would not spot a small child.

Microsoft Office 2000 Assistant

Coloured vinyl records

Two cows in a field. Which one has BSE? The one that is on fire.

I was once asked about CV gaps and came up with the following suggestions. Not sure if they will be much help. Suggestions for filling gaps in your CV Fast asleep After attending a party where I probably had too many glasses of wine, I fell fast asleep and woke up nine months later. Although I have no recollection of this, I am now feel wide-awake and fresh as a daisy, ready to do a hard day’s work. Convicted of a crime I did not commit As the result of a clerical error in police criminal records, I was imprisoned for murdering a spouse I haven’t got. After a lengthy appeal I was finally released. While still somewhat bitter about my incarceration, I am now more than ever aware of the importance of keeping information accurate and up to date and the need to locate that information quickly and easily. Comatose After eating a large bowl of goulash, I discovered that I was extremely allergic to paprika by falling into a deep coma. Although normally detrimental to anyone’s health, the doctors used revolutionary techniques of resuscitation that also activated parts of my brain that are normally dormant in most humans. While my extra-sensory perception and telekinetic skills are still rudimentary, I still feel I am more capable than most in the more mundane tasks that one encounters in an office environment. Abducted by aliens While acknowledging that it is highly unusual for this to happen to a non-American, suggesting poor navigational skills on the part of my abductors, I was taken to a planet orbiting Tau Ceti Three, a small yellow dwarf star approximately fifteen light years from Earth. There I was enlightened on Life, the Universe and the role of Planet Earth in the grand scheme of things. Consequently I find mere terrestrial matters such as secretarial and administrative duties to be relatively more straightforward than I had previously believed. Furthermore, as anyone familiar with Einstein’s theory of relativity will know, my sustained periods of travelling at faster than the speed of light mean than I am actually younger and fresher than my years would suggest. Temporary insanity For a brief spell I just lost it totally. I was taken away, placed in a straightjacket and thrown into a padded cell. Now that I am over that, I am now very CALM and collected and able to COPE with the modern STRESSES AND STRAINS of a typical office environment. Furthermore, I feel that my condition, although temporary, means I have will have a greater understanding and sympathy for colleagues with a similar but more enduring condition. Secret Mission I was recruited by government agents to deal with a matter of grave nation importance. That I am not willing to discuss this sensitive issue at all should be proof that I can be trusted with confidential information.

I think the BBC should do a remake of "I, Claudius". Bring it up to date, set it in North Korea and call it "I, Kim"

Time for a touch of irony

Okay. But is this you?

.. or these

You mean these:

.. and another one that has the thread title on the label.

That anyone joining the Navy is a twat and the Air Force is full of pansies. Inter-service rivalry being what it is. .. or maybe his application to become a monk.

Chocolate as it use to be

In much the same way that UKIP ceased to exist once the UK voted to leave the EU. After independence, the SNP would continue to exist to ensure that it was not some watered down semi-independence. Can you name any country that gained independence where the leader of the ruling party then said: "Job done. My opponents can run the country now - I am away fishing."

Highly advanced computer games