accies1874

That's a textbook example of a penalty that only Celtic and Rangers get. If that happened up the other end, do you really think that'd get given? Wait a sec

Didn't bother with heading to Kelty today but, from what I've heard, it seems like it was a clinical performance. Don't think many expected Akheem Rose to get five goals in his first six games, especially given he's looked at his worst in front of goal.

11. The Promised Land - Cinema This was a pretty standard good film that, imo, didn't go much further than that. It tells the story of a poor 18th century Danish ex-soldier, played by Mads Mikkelsen, trying to build a settlement on disputed land which the greedy, rich baddie thinks is his. It's an underdog story with a hero who you can root for. Mads Mikkelsen's character rose through the ranks of the Danish army from humble beginnings, but his first scene sees him come into confrontation with the elites due to them not taking him seriously because of those beginnings, despite what he's since gone on to achieve. He helps migrant workers, cares for a little sweary girl who's racially discriminated against, and stands against the tyrannical antagonist despite all of the risks that brings. As the protagonist is easy to root for, the antagonist is easy to hate. His greed sees him quash anyone who he thinks might post even a minor threat to his ego, torturing someone to death early on, which is why he's always looking to cultivate more despite his immense wealth. He's just a proper bad guy. That classic dynamic between a goodie and a baddie, as well as the fact that it's really quite funny, means that it should go down well with anyone who sees it. 12. Love Lies Bleeding - Cinema (Glasgow Film Festival) When I first saw the trailer I wondered why the director of one of the best horror films in recent years (Saint Maud) was making a pulpy revenge flick, but there are similarities between them in terms of both depicting lonely women with delusions as to how they can escape their past with sexual liberty playing quite a big role. There are also supernatural transformations that straddle the line between metaphorical and literal in terms of how they affect the narrative. The transformation in Love Lies Bleeding reminded me of a superhero origin film like Sam Raimi's Spider-Man trilogy; the kind of superhero film that folk say has horror elements which more often than not are apparent in transformations/mutations. You can also see similarities with some of the darker Coen Brothers' work, partly due to its domesticated violence between strange characters, but mostly because that violence is balanced out by plenty of dark comedy. Perhaps the Coens' most distinctive characteristic as a duo is their Violent Comedy or Comedic Violence and this definitely falls into the latter category. I did struggle sometimes struggle with the script of Love Lies Bleeding, though, which can be somewhat handwaved away by its b-movie elements, such as the somewhat weird dialogue and characters (the latter I actually quite liked), but they did make me feel a bit disconnected from it all despite Rose Glass doing her very best as a director to reel you in. It tells so much of its story through closeups - and that story isn't all that pleasant. Kristen Stewart is shagging Katy M. Brian who works for Kristen Stewart's criminal dad Ed Harris and shagged Kristen Stewart's brother-in-law Dave Franco who beats his wife Jena Ortega. Love. Lies. Bleeding. That unpleasantness is passed onto the audience due to all of these closeups and absolutely incredible sound that is possibly the most affecting element of the film. It's jolting, unsettling and perfectly conveys the story's brutality. Even the opening with hench dudes pumping iron establishes the importance of powerful sounds. I liked how that opening with the gym equipment and grindset signs around the gym then cuts away to Kristen Stewart unblocking one of the gym's toilets - sets everything up quite nicely.

Due to being in the Premiership for so long, it's natural to think that we should be striving to return there, but I always felt like we were outsiders in the top flight in that last spell ("punching above our weight" etc) so that might not be a reasonable ambition. My ambition is for us to not be a club always on the brink of catastrophe and to actually have a bit of fun on Saturdays.

It's certainly "different". Not so much a biopic, more of a brutal, nightmarish depiction of fame that has some grounding in the true story. Can't imagine her estate would've been cool with much of it.

That's why Blonde's so great.

Yip, that's why I'm gonna pick and choose games between now and the play-offs (providing we get there...). These past couple of games have felt like we're just killing time before losing in the play-offs, so I'm not happy with paying the joint-most expensive tickets in the league to watch them have a crap kickabout. We were great that day playing with a narrow midfield, almost a 4-2-2-2, but with threats all over the park. Then we lost our next two and moved to a much wider 4-3-3 which looked like a good blueprint for success. Then we failed to win three in a row and have struggled to resemble a football team since. It was always going to be a challenge maintaining any sort of feel-good factor when you've just been relegated and have stuck with the same manager who oversaw that, but it really feels like we've fallen back into the usual crap that we've been subjected to over the past few years. Results have been bad, the football's poor, the fans are raging - at least we're consistent as a club.

This is interesting. I was quite surprised when Scott McKenna started both games in November and wondered if it could've been to get a left-footer and right-footer in the CB pairing, but it would make sense if Clarke saw it as a good opportunity to give a regular squad member some minutes while out of the picture at club level.

Oh dear. Maybe Joel Coen was the true brains of the operation after all.

MacDonald confirmed to have suffered a fractured skull: I thought I could hear a crack when he got injured but was hoping that I hadn't. That'll be his season over, obviously, but I just hope he doesn't have any other after-effects to worry about.

I don't think there are many things as equally hilarious and infuriating as a player pretending they're injured before leaping up to receive a pass.

Tbf my one time at Stamford Bridge was the only time I've heard someone at the football talking about their recent skiing trip.

Thank god. Let me know when you lot actually have some good patter to hit us with.

Fs had a post about penalty takers ready to go

Another nonsense VAR decision that wouldn't have been give me without it, once again showing that yes, VAR is in fact the problem.

What's the deal with the 50+1 banner in the Motherwell end? Is that something they're wanting to implement?

The ball ends up a couple of yards inside the post and Lyness' footwork seems weird. It almost looks like he would've been better off just standing still.

Not sure if the intention was for Sammon to score, but if not then that's a nice set-piece routine for Alloa's winner. 2v1 on Kilday to let Sammon get the run on him, a block on the goalkeeper and a player ghosting in at the back post to take advantage of our man on the front post playing everyone onside at the first contact. That said, staying switched on at set-pieces is turning into a big issue for us. This dreadful home form has seen us concede set-piece goals against Kelty, Montrose, Annan and now Alloa. I think they've all been unmarked players scoring too, either at the second phase or second contact at set-pieces (or a short one in Kelty's case).

I only tuned in for the Mumbongossance (it kinda works when spoken, trust me)

Yeah I thought that a draw would've been fair. Alloa look much improved from the last time they were at NDP (what a difference losing Brian Rice makes) and played through our insipid press really nicely at points. Plenty of clever passes into midfield from wide which I seem to remember being an issue against someone earlier this season (maybe Cove?) and linkups out wide. We kept the ball a wee bit better than we have recently and managed to get the ball into decent areas, but there was a real lack of composure in and around the box which could be put down to the lack of confidence that a run like ours will bring. I don't think the performance was bad in isolation, but it looks a hell of a lot worse when it's the third defeat in a row. I would also like to apologise to that p***k @LeodhasXD for disagreeing with his take in December that we were overperforming at that point. We've won three times since then.

The same balloon who talks about "honesty" and "integrity" on his LinkedIn profile.

No you don't. Trust me.

I don't think many owners, board members etc go into clubs with bad intentions; I reckon the vast majority genuinely want the club to succeed. Imo the issue is that you usually need to have enjoyed some financial success in your time to be able to invest in a football club, and financial success like that results in an ego (or was the product of one) which fans often confuse for 'ambition' when a new person invests. When you're on a downward trajectory, the prospect of your fortunes being turned around by a millionaire with an ego is tantalising, so you don't tend to question these "p***ks" looking to invest. Most of them don't have any noteworthy experience in football until they buy their way into it, but they think they're experts because a) their success in a different field, b) their egos, and c) football is the biggest thing in the country so everyone wants to be a part of it - how hard can it be for a successful entrepreneur? That means you're left with a bunch of inexperienced rich folk with huge egos leading a pretty unusual business (a football club), so it's really no surprise that it goes tits up and those in charge don't have a clue what to do. Right now, Zengin's goal is the same as the fans': to get promoted. He's done some good in terms of his moves to buy the stadium, stumping up some cash for players and improved communication with fans. Point number two needs the caveat of that cash being used on a bloated squad, and the improvement in communication has taken a hit since results started getting worse (always a likely outcome). He has some leeway as he's not been in the door long and it hasn't been all shite, but all of the above means that I'm naturally sceptical towards how much we'll improve in the coming years. Hopefully in a few years time this is made to look unfairly cynical.

We've struggled in both games against Alloa this season and those were while we were still playing well, so this is set to be another frustrating afternoon that has the potential to turn toxic pretty quickly.