The Other Foot

Their newest fleet

I've got some sobering words for my fellow Hibees today. In 2016, I was thousands of miles away, unable to get back home. Watched the whole thing on an illegal stream, on my lonesome. Best footballing moment of my life,but....if you can't be there in person, a little bit of you dies. Oh, your family and friends might not notice (if you manage the situation correctly). But deep down, you suddenly realise that the sunshine isn't a pleasant golden orb in the sky, but a ferocious ball of all-consuming hate; the birds that tweet in the trees aren't the melodious songstrels of Spring, but the sharp-taloned harpies of a spiteful God; and beer actually tastes of granny bunions. So, enjoy the day if we win. But never expect to be happy again. With that said, GETFUCKININTAETHEMHIBS!!!!!!

IT'S TODAY

Ohmygod, his Spanish riff at 02:15 Viva el Futbol Club de Hiberniados

This 'salty tears' chat Fact of the matter is, a club with the relative spending power of Rangers 2.0 should be winning the league (alternating, from time to time, with that other mob). As such, their fans will never experience the elation of such an occasion as Hibs' 2016 cup win. Except, perhaps, if they were to win some form of European Cup.

Well, you've got one thing right. Sevco fans are certainly an underclass.

I missed the bit where we thought Kinky had died. Why did we think he had died?

Does anyone know what would happen if you took two different vaccines? I don't mean one jab of AZ and one of Pfizer... I mean a full two doses of each

St Johnstone have Glenn Middleton? Well played, Perth. Well played.

Ah yes, that would be the Doric loving cup.

I admire every single one of the non-OF teams. Even Hearts. Absolutely love Scottish football. Having lived abroad for 7 years now, it's only been emphasised. In a way, I was jealous of Sevco fans getting to start from the bottom and visit the grounds of all the teams throughout the league system. Diverse group of towns, teams and techniques - and a really hard-nosed, fast paced, honest brand of football in general. Rangers and Celtic - meh. I don't hate them, but they bring down an otherwise quirky and diverse footballing community. Can't help but feel that if Glasgow were to have more than just two huge teams and two small teams, it might make for a more interesting footballing city. As it stands, their dominance - and the extra baggage they bring to the game - are fairly unwelcome.

Ah well, thank God for unrestricted international travel. It doesn't really matter if we get dumped out early, at least we'll have the chance to go to some amazing places. Right?

PORTOOOOOO

YAAAAASSSSSSS

3-1

2-1

Boyler scores

Gogic red

Hibs winning the 'thumbs-up' game on BBC live text if that's anything to go by

Half-time entertainment: Motherwell? No, she's dead.

It's 6-6 all over again. Except it's not. Because it's 2-2.

Ian Rankin is pish. Loved his books when I was a teen. Half a life later, I've just re-read Strip Jack. It's dreadful. Here's a snifter: "I think there's some Scotch broth left over from lunch" . His vowels turned broth into 'braw-wrath'. The braw wrath of the Scots, Rebus though to himself. Firstly, cringe. Secondly, who else would he think to if not to himself? Almost as pish as Irvine Welsh.

Where was your empathy when you flung sh*te at a pal?

1. You sign up to forum... <check> 2. You create a poorly thought-out username and omit capitalisation on all but the first word... <check> 3. Determined to share the thought that has just entered your head (before you sneeze/fart and it suddenly disappears) you forget to choose a personalised avatar... <check> 4. Barely able to contain your quivering glee, you bang out your first post with one grimy forefinger, tongue lolling from mouth, erection slowly sprouting within a dark and gloomy pair of tracksuit bottoms... <check> 5. You press 'submit'... <check> 6. You wait for the frothy-mouthed denizens of P&B to writhe and wriggle in fury... <check> 7. You gawk, open mouthed and weeping, as they completely ignore you and argue with one of the many faceless and uninteresting Sevco fans who have suddenly popped up in the last few months... <check> 8. Your smartphone is confiscated, for the fifteenth time, by one of the guards at Carstairs... <check>