Raith Against The Machine

Any news from today's game?

It also sounds like "ass-wad". Pro-tip.

Front and centre = touching his mate's thigh. Kinky.

Right back is quite a pedestrian position - if he was a 20 goal a season striker, I'd probably have my little sister sponsor his shirt.

I'm not usually one for putting moral issues ahead of footballing decisions, but I don't think this one would be worth it. Any potential football benefits would be outweighed by the negative press attention, the painfully predictable "PEEDO OUT NOW!!!1" boycott, possible "squad harmony" issues, and whatever else. He's a young fella who should probably be embraced at some level by the football community, but he'd probably be better off trying out somewhere abroad, where the press attention won't be quite so intense.

DEFINITELY GET MCBRIDE OFF THIS TIME

GET MCBRIDE OFF NOOOOW

I also remember reading something from a manager (I honestly can't remember who, I'm afraid) saying that he loved seeing an opposition defence with a right-footed right-back, and a left-footed right-sided central defender, if that isn't too hyphenated to make sense. It basically opens up a massive corridor for a traditional tricky left winger to exploit when he cuts inside, with neither defender being able to make a challenge with their preferred foot.

I imagine it's to do with the majority of attackers being right footed, so that more often than not the defender is going in on his weaker foot.

I'm on my 6th episode of the Gilmore Girls.

Should this not really be just "The Raith Rovers Thread" by now?

That's a bigger fucking collar than DI Porter's Celtic Park bust.

Ian Rankin is currently rewriting more than half of his latest novel after jumping the gun with the first draft, with several key plot points involving Raith Rovers playing in the SPL. The climax of the story, in which it is revealed that all fourteen of John McGlynn's summer signings are undercover police officers, was set to involve Detective Inspector Marcus Porter of F Division and the Number 9 shirt scoring a shock hat-trick at Celtic Park to clinch the league title, before arresting 30,000 members of the home support singlehandedly.

John McGlynn is set to leave the Rovers by January, but not for another football club! He's going to utilise his managerial skills to launch a nationwide plumbing network.

Right, I'm fucking bored, especially with the complete lack of Rovers news. Outlandish Rovers rumours, go! Marvin Andrews is set to return for a 4th spell as a player/coach, splitting his time between Kirkcaldy and a post as head coach of Trinidad and Tobago's Under 19s Manager.

Presumably they're hoping that more people buy the shirt than they would a normal away shirt, making up for the money lost on the sponsor.

Yeah, when you hit "Create a New Message" and it has the "To:" box, start typing a name and it gives you the little drop down with your friends names. Choose the one you want, and then just start typing the next person's name, and it should just keep on going until you've added everyone you want.

It's probably because you're thick. I've never heard of one either.

I'm going to complain about FanTalk, again. I know it's a bit like complaining about Hitler, in as much as everyone already knows how terrible it is, but I just can't help myself. How do you get through life without learning how to spell the word "away". Especially as a football fan, the word "away" occurs several thousand times every Saturday, and not once, in any newspaper, television programme or website is it every spelled "awey". I'm paraphrasing some wordsmith from this website, but it really does seem like most of the posters on said Rovers forum think that a comma is a deep sleep you don't wake up from, and that the full stop is a dance from the 30s.

Townie food? I eat Townie food for breakfast!

You weren't there man, you don't know!

Aye, but there's no a Stephens, eh?

Does anyone at Stirling know roughly when the resits will be? I've got a terrible feeling that they coincide with me going on holiday, and while I don't know if I'll be doing any yet, at least one of my mates also going has one.

Seems like quite a lot of Stirling's results are already through, but I've not had anything back yet.

Some of the local takeaways really need to put more effort into their taglines. They just don't make sense, half the time. There's a new one here called Sizzlers, which has two slogans. The first is "The name speaks for itself!" which you could probably argue is true, if it wasn't a completely meaningless phrase. It also boasts that "price and quality come first!" Well, no. One of them comes first, the other comes a close second. Taking the crown though, is the sadly now-defunct takeaway that cried out "No gimmicks! Just real good food!" - the name of this straightforward, no-gimmick institution? Ali McBaba's.