Out of the mouth of babes...

[welshbairn]

We've been away in Aviemore for a few days with some friends, with me driving up with the Mrs, her pal and her 6 year old lass. The wee lass was mostly playing on the iPad in the back, occasionally moaning about the long drive, when she suddenly blurted out "mummy, would you rather go skydiving without a parachute or sleep with a farmer?" 
Kids' minds work in hilarious ways.

She was reading the Apples and Pears thread.

[alta-pete]

Watching River City just now (I know).

“Does Glasgow really have a subway?” [emoji31]

[Shandon Par]

In the kitchen earlier minding my own business as missus was putting stuff in the blender to make a smoothie. Along with the berries, frozen yoghurt etc she put in a big metal spoon and showered me with obliterated smoothie maker. 

[Rugster]

21 minutes ago, Shandon Par said:

In the kitchen earlier minding my own business as missus was putting stuff in the blender to make a smoothie. Along with the berries, frozen yoghurt etc she put in a big metal spoon and showered me with obliterated smoothie maker. 

What did she say?

[ayrshire_nomad]

In the kitchen earlier minding my own business as missus was putting stuff in the blender to make a smoothie. Along with the berries, frozen yoghurt etc she put in a big metal spoon and showered me with obliterated smoothie maker. 

There's loads being said about faulty white goods causing fires, now this with blenders, jeezo!

[Shandon Par]

4 minutes ago, Rugster said:

What did she say?

She just tutted at as I tutted at her to suggest she be more careful when showering the kitchen with glass and plastic.

[Shandon Par]

1 minute ago, ayrshire_nomad said:

There's loads being said about faulty white goods causing fires, now this with blenders, jeezo!

Clearly a design flaw in this instance.

[Rugster]

6 minutes ago, Shandon Par said:

She just tutted at as I tutted at her to suggest she be more careful when showering the kitchen with glass and plastic.

This is the silly things they say thread, not silly things they do thread. Silly. 

[Shandon Par]

3 minutes ago, Rugster said:

This is the silly things they say thread, not silly things they do thread. Silly. 

That would be a very long thread. Was just taking liberties as it’s in a similar vein.

[chomp my root]

Was at the missus allotment doing the heavy stuff for her while she was fannying around and she got herself confused putting the onions in 8 inches apart. It was only apparent when she figured out that she'd gone wrong at 67 inches. I still had to do the 8, 16, 24.....  

I promise she's academic, although I'm starting to doubt her.

[19QOS19]

Watching the horses eye up the first fence in the National:- 

They can't start there, they'll need a run up to jump that surely?

[Melanius Mullarkey]

On 11/04/2018 at 22:58, chomp my root said:

Was at the missus allotment doing the heavy stuff for her while she was fannying around and she got herself confused putting the onions in 8 inches apart. 

 

[Shandon Par]

Missus filling in a passport form. Names changed to protect the innocent..

"What is Anna's (our daughter)town of birth?". 

Yes, she's being serious so I tell her it's Kirkcaldy (poor kid) and have to spell it for her (understandable). It's probably fair enough as her mind would have been too preoccupied en-route to the hospital to notice what town it was. 

"How do you spell your middle name" is the next question.

It's our 15th anniversary soon. 

[HenryHill]

3 hours ago, Shandon Par said:

Missus filling in a passport form. Names changed to protect the innocent..

"What is Anna's (our daughter)town of birth?". 

Yes, she's being serious so I tell her it's Kirkcaldy (poor kid) and have to spell it for her (understandable). It's probably fair enough as her mind would have been too preoccupied en-route to the hospital to notice what town it was. 

"How do you spell your middle name" is the next question.

It's our 15th anniversary soon. 

Suede can be tricky to spell if you haven't written it for a while 

[Shandon Par]

3 minutes ago, HenryHill said:

Suede can be tricky to spell if you haven't written it for a while 

Hey Henry - you've selected a team at last! Make hay while the sun shines and all that. 

[HenryHill]

45 minutes ago, Shandon Par said:

Hey Henry - you've selected a team at last! Make hay while the sun shines and all that. 

?

[Shandon Par]

20 minutes ago, HenryHill said:

?

Maybe I’m wrong - never saw your selected team showing before. 

Had this from her yesterday too.. Is her dentist Rose West?

 

[Sergeant Wilson]

2 minutes ago, Shandon Par said:

Maybe I’m wrong - never saw your selected team showing before. 

Had this from her yesterday too.. Is her dentist Rose West?

 

You have a communication problem. Avoid this by never responding to any form of communication. It saves any misunderstanding.

[ShaggysBeard]

On 28/03/2018 at 09:52, buchan30 said:

I can top that. Sitting having a discussion about countries and she was adamant that turkey was close to africa. So we get the bairns atlas out to show her it’s closer to the middle east.

Then she sees egypt on the map, and says “egypts not in africa” this is despite having a map infront on her, it written in black and white and having being published in all the atlases ever, Yet she wasn’t having it.

 

 

I see your point, but Turkey is fairly close to Africa. I wouldn't fancy swimming it but it's only about 300 miles across the Mediterranean Sea from the coast of northern Africa.

[Ross.]

On 4/18/2018 at 14:12, Shandon Par said:

"How do you spell your middle name" is the next question.

It's our 15th anniversary soon. 

Due to a mistake at the passport office, my birth certificate and passport have different spellings for my middle name. Should probably get that fixed when I renew in the next year or so.