Bobby Skidmarks Posted January 1, 2020 Share Posted January 1, 2020 I dunno mate. I know you’d like to have some control and give her a taste of her own medicine by letting her husband know, but I’d try and distance myself from the whole fucking debacle and try and repair my head for a few weeks. These are crucial for you to realise it’s not your fault. None of this is. f**k knows, just my take on it and I’ve never been in this position. 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
8MileBU Posted January 1, 2020 Share Posted January 1, 2020 The shorter daylight hours never help this time of year either.Fucking right. Hate winter months. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
welshbairn Posted January 1, 2020 Share Posted January 1, 2020 (edited) 1 hour ago, pandarilla said: Yeah but jambomo isn't responsible for any of that. If your answer to having a violent husband is to have an affair with a guy in a relationship then you waive any special confidentiality privileges (in my book, anyway). Delivering that news would not be pleasant - but I can't see how jambomo wouldn't be well within her rights to do it. Possibly devastating the life of an innocent party by telling him something he didn't want to know wouldn't help Jambomo. As I said, we have no idea of the circumstances. I'm not claiming it would be wrong for her to tell him, just that it's impossible for us to know. Edited January 1, 2020 by welshbairn 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
8MileBU Posted January 1, 2020 Share Posted January 1, 2020 On a scale of 1-10, how awful would I look if I went into his Facebook acciunt and told everyone about their affair? This would mean both her and her husband would see it. I do not know if her husband knows. actually I know it’s a shit, petty, humiliating thing for me to do hence I am posting here and not actually on Facebook.Nah don’t do that. Her husband doesn’t deserve to find out like that. Would probably be pretty embarrassing and humiliating when he’s done you no wrong. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
carpetmonster Posted January 1, 2020 Share Posted January 1, 2020 6 minutes ago, 8MileBU said: Fucking right. Hate winter months. Vitamin D supplements help mate. As does going swimming; exercise is always a good idea anyway, but there's something nice about being in the water when you can see it blizzarding of snow thru the windows. No Kenneths please. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pandarilla Posted January 1, 2020 Share Posted January 1, 2020 Possibly devastating the life of an innocent party by telling him something he didn't want to know wouldn't help Jambomo. As I said, we have no idea of the circumstances. I'm not claiming it would be wrong for her to tell him, just that it's impossible for us to know.It might not be a positive thing for her to do - but my point is that she's well within her rights to tell him. She's not being out of order in any way by taking that action (unlike the FB post which would be pretty shitty, even if they arguably deserved it).Telling her husband might be the best thing that could happen to him, and on the balance of probability, I'd say it's more likely he'd rather know than not know. Like someone else said, he might already know - but even at that there's no harm done. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
welshbairn Posted January 1, 2020 Share Posted January 1, 2020 4 minutes ago, pandarilla said: Telling her husband might be the best thing that could happen to him Or it could be the worst, with unknown consequences. We can't possibly know, so shouldn't be giving advice in ignorance, other than cautionary. There are no universal rules in these things. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RH33 Posted January 1, 2020 Share Posted January 1, 2020 3 hours ago, scmwell said: Changed from citalopram to venlafaxine in the last month, feel worse than ever I feel the life being sucked from me. Relationship a mess feel like we should ge a divorce but scared of consequences kids financial etc They say never make decisions when at a low point. However if the relationship is over and the environment isn’t a healthy one to raise kids then it may be the best option. My youngest knows no different but my older two still kind of remember. While it was hard at the time everyone is much happier. My ex is remarried to someone whom he’s much more suited too. And I’m....,welll I’m having plenty of fun when I can Really though it’s only you and your wife who can decide and it isn’t an easy conversation. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Priti priti priti Patel Posted January 2, 2020 Share Posted January 2, 2020 3 hours ago, RH33 said: They say never make decisions when at a low point. However if the relationship is over and the environment isn’t a healthy one to raise kids then it may be the best option. My youngest knows no different but my older two still kind of remember. While it was hard at the time everyone is much happier. My ex is remarried to someone whom he’s much more suited too. And I’m....,welll I’m having plenty of fun when I can Really though it’s only you and your wife who can decide and it isn’t an easy conversation. If it's not too personal to ask, I would be interested to hear what it is about him that you didn't match up with but which he has found in his second wife. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Priti priti priti Patel Posted January 2, 2020 Share Posted January 2, 2020 On 31/12/2019 at 21:33, Raidernation said: Looks like I’ll be in my own tonight. Ah well early toned I guess Happy New Year big man. Like someone else said, "in awe of what you go through". I really picture you as someone of huge emotional strength. A bit of a giant of P&B in that respect. Very impressive. Glad you've posted again to say you'll not feel sad. You aren't alone in being alone. My mum went to bed at about 10 pm she said. She was on her own. She's had my dad die in 2005 and then her second husband die in 2013. Some people just have it bad, I guess, but from the comparatively small struggles I have I know the feeling of pride and relief when the sun shines again, and when that day comes again for people like you and her I guess the feeling is going to be immense. 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RH33 Posted January 2, 2020 Share Posted January 2, 2020 4 hours ago, Margaret Thatcher said: If it's not too personal to ask, I would be interested to hear what it is about him that you didn't match up with but which he has found in his second wife. Shared interests. Dr Who, Sc-fi, comics, films. None of that interests me one bit. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Priti priti priti Patel Posted January 2, 2020 Share Posted January 2, 2020 16 hours ago, RH33 said: Shared interests. Dr Who, Sc-fi, comics, films. None of that interests me one bit. Fair enough. Was the lack of shared interests the main reason for the divorce in the first place? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RH33 Posted January 2, 2020 Share Posted January 2, 2020 6 minutes ago, Margaret Thatcher said: Fair enough. Was the lack of shared interests the main reason for the divorce in the first place? No. Not really stuff I’d post in public forum tbh. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Priti priti priti Patel Posted January 2, 2020 Share Posted January 2, 2020 Just now, RH33 said: No. Not really stuff I’d post in public forum tbh. Fair enough 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Raidernation Posted January 3, 2020 Share Posted January 3, 2020 I’m having a positive day, see RTBC thread [emoji106] 11 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hearthammer Posted January 3, 2020 Share Posted January 3, 2020 7 hours ago, Raidernation said: I’m having a positive day, see RTBC thread Great to hear, big guy 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FalkirkBairn93 Posted January 3, 2020 Share Posted January 3, 2020 Whilst my mental health has been up and down, my physical health has felt like I’ve had a constant cold now for about a month and a half. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SlipperyP Posted January 3, 2020 Share Posted January 3, 2020 9 minutes ago, FalkirkBairn93 said: Whilst my mental health has been up and down, my physical health has felt like I’ve had a constant cold now for about a month and a half. It may be a side effect if you are on medication or low white blood cells with your immune system running low also. i'm no doctor, but this can come on from mental stress. Everyone knows you should eat healthy, but here is a list. https://www.verywellfamily.com/best-foods-boost-immune-system-4020423 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jacksgranda Posted January 3, 2020 Share Posted January 3, 2020 12 hours ago, Margaret Thatcher said: Fair enough. Was the lack of shared interests the main reason for the divorce in the first place? Nosy f******. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
peasy23 Posted January 3, 2020 Share Posted January 3, 2020 Fuckin dreading tonight. First new year without my dad. I know it’s worse for my mum but just sitting here breaking my heart. Know how you feel, I was in the same place at Xmas/New Year last year. The birthdays, anniversaries and the festive season are definitely the worst for giving you a swift boot in the balls to remind you that you are missing someone. This year has been a bit easier. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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