Bonksy+HisChristianParade Posted October 13, 2014 Share Posted October 13, 2014 I always found the doormen at Glasgow Clubs the worst.......when I lived there the amount of times they'ed ruin a night out with the "not tonight" shit when you've had friends come through from Perth! Even pre-arranging entry with the Manager on the Thursday made fcuk all difference! That was exactly the case on Saturday. Couple of mates come through from Perth for a night out. Luckily we got in the third place but it's definitely a bit different from The Loft, where you probably need to be involved in a punch up in the queue in order to be rejected. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gaz FFC Posted October 13, 2014 Share Posted October 13, 2014 Is the standard "not tonight" meant to mean 1, you're not a tasty burd wearing nothing. 2, you look steaming. 3, you look liable to kick off if someone bumps into you. 4, I only let my mates and Burds in here. Any bouncers or mates of bouncers clarify this? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Honest_Man#1 Posted October 13, 2014 Share Posted October 13, 2014 There's only a small number of clubs worth bothering for in Glasgow anyhow, namely Buff Club, Subby, the arches, and possibly la cheetah. The bouncers at buff club and Subby are actually reasonably sound and usually treat you like a human. Big fan of eccies? If you're not chewing your jaw off in Subclub then you're the only one. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ICTChris Posted October 13, 2014 Share Posted October 13, 2014 A bouncer tried tripping me up one evening in Edinburgh, then went to hit me so I smacked him first. Ended up with three or four of them piling on top of me and they phoned the law. Done a weekender and got a £150 fine for the privilege. b*****ds. Derek Riordan type post ITPO. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bonksy+HisChristianParade Posted October 13, 2014 Share Posted October 13, 2014 Big fan of eccies? If you're not chewing your jaw off in Subclub then you're the only one. No I'm a fan of a sounder clientele who don't just go to a club to stand around posing and try to sleaze their way in about girls all night. Good music, sound open-minded people (for the most part) and a good atmosphere. Also not true about subclub, although it does happen a lot. Buff club has actually grown on me lately and would be my club of choice in general. **** although I might just be bitter because I've got a gf and my sleazing days are now over. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hedgecutter Posted October 13, 2014 Share Posted October 13, 2014 I find that answering the question "where have you been tonight?" with a fully comprehensive description to the level of the southwest sauce which you put on your 6" sub in Subway gets you in just to shut you up. As long as you don't slur it all of course. They may as well just say "speak for a couple of sentences so I can judge if you're pissed, a ned in disguise or both". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cardinal Richelieu Posted October 13, 2014 Share Posted October 13, 2014 Another response to the "Where have you been to tonight?" is "In bed with your wife mate" and a sly wink. This is the especially useful if you don't want to get into the club in the first place. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SodjesSixteenIncher Posted October 13, 2014 Share Posted October 13, 2014 Edinburgh is the worst city by miles for this type of behaviour. Plus the majority of bouncers are pathetic fairies that would end up getting leathered if it did kick off. Having lived in Glasgow and Edinburgh, I have to agree with sjc that the weegie bouncers are 100x worse. Mind you all the clubs in Edinburgh are shite, so that's probably why. As I've said before, I tripped up on the way into Hive once absolutely blootered and the bouncer just picked me up and let me in. When you can fall into a club, you ken its not an exclusive experience. Tbf the bouncers on George St are pretty bad but that's because those clubs are pretending not to be shit. I never go there so have had more experience of arsey Glasgow bouncers. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hedgecutter Posted October 13, 2014 Share Posted October 13, 2014 I have to agree with sjc that the weegie bouncers are 100x worse. Thirded. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tommy Nooka Posted October 13, 2014 Share Posted October 13, 2014 This thread reminds me why I no longer go drinking anywhere that requires bouncers. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sergie's no1 fan Posted October 13, 2014 Share Posted October 13, 2014 The Kilty Kilty's in Paisley had a no white trainer policy going on a few years ago so I got kb'd. I put my black socks over the trainers and they let me in . Fucking idiots. Never been back in that shithole. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sjc Posted October 13, 2014 Share Posted October 13, 2014 Having lived in Glasgow and Edinburgh, I have to agree with sjc that the weegie bouncers are 100x worse. Mind you all the clubs in Edinburgh are shite, so that's probably why. As I've said before, I tripped up on the way into Hive once absolutely blootered and the bouncer just picked me up and let me in. When you can fall into a club, you ken its not an exclusive experience. Tbf the bouncers on George St are pretty bad but that's because those clubs are pretending not to be shit. I never go there so have had more experience of arsey Glasgow bouncers. Agree with that too mate. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sjc Posted October 13, 2014 Share Posted October 13, 2014 I remember being in a Club in North Wales once during my student days in Manchester where my mate and I had to fight our way out of the place............genuinely thought I was going to die that night! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ross. Posted October 13, 2014 Share Posted October 13, 2014 The bouncers over here tend to be sound as f*ck. In my experience anyway. Any time they ask the usual questions at the door, and you answer in a Scottish accent, they automatically sense that the bar takings will be going up exponentially and let you in. I've only been knocked back from 1 club over here, in Zürich, and in all honesty the state I was in it would have been a bit of a riddy for them to let me in anyway. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
superwellfan Posted October 13, 2014 Share Posted October 13, 2014 The bouncers at buff club and Subby are actually reasonably sound and usually treat you like a human. Big fan of eccies? If you're not chewing your jaw off in Subclub then you're the only one. My mate rolls his head a fair bit when we're out on the swedgers and often catches the bouncers at Subby's attention because of it. Love their laid back attitude though, they generally chuck him out for a wee 10 minute break before letting him make his triumphant return in an even more severely eccied state. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hillonearth Posted October 13, 2014 Share Posted October 13, 2014 Funniest one I remember was in Ashton Lane – forget which pub though, maybe Brel. Mate of mine and I were walking down the lane, actually on our way to somewhere on Byres Rd, when a bouncer comes out and gives us the old “not tonight” routine, which was fairly bizarre as we hadn’t even broken stride on the way by. We just pished ourselves laughing at him and told him we’d bear it in mind. Must have looked like a right pair of reprobates that night though. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Uncle Psychosis Posted October 13, 2014 Share Posted October 13, 2014 Anyone been done in by bouncers before? A mate of mine got a proper tanking off a big South African twat at the Cathouse but I wasn't there, another guy on a work night in Walkabout got asked to leave for being melted, he said no worries he would just get his jacket which was about 10 Feet away, bouncers said no and manhandled him towards the door, when he tried to wriggle off them they took him down a fire escape and battered utter shite out him, he had to go to hospital. Not a proper tanking but at a club in Edinburgh once I'd been in the place for literally a few minutes and I was just taking my first sip of my first drink of the evening (for some reason that I can't recall I hadn't been drinking at all before going to the club) when a bouncer grabbed me by the back of the neck and the arm whilst shouting "you've been causing bother, you're leaving". Despite my protests I was physically dragged to the cloakroom to get my coat (he wouldn't let go of me despite me making little to no attempt to resist him---I can barely fight sleep ffs) then physically dragged to the steps where he pretty much threw me up them, bashing my shins, just about breaking my arm and all the while still tightly gripping my neck. As I'm getting myself up off the floor bouncer number two announces "thats no the guy". Bouncer number one shrugs and says to me "oh right. you can go back in pal". Aye, that'll be right ya c**t. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blootoon87 Posted October 13, 2014 Share Posted October 13, 2014 Bouncers seem to have an unnatural hatred towards me. No matter how sober a state I'm in I always get singled out by them. I think it's probably a subconscious thing now and I start thinking I'm not getting in and looking shifty. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mizfit Posted October 13, 2014 Share Posted October 13, 2014 Got refused entry into the garage(?) in Aberdeen because me and my mate were blootered. We went for a walk convinced the other bouncer on the door after a 10 minute stoat we were fine and they let us in. Oh and bonksy, I've been refused into loft once without fighting. I'd walked out of the royal on the corner and face planted the deck in front of the bouncers. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JamboMikey Posted October 13, 2014 Share Posted October 13, 2014 The worst one is when you manage to keep your shit together long off to get in but then once that pressure is gone your or one of your mates immediately does something to get you ejected. My mate recently pointed to a beverage behind the bar so exuberantly that he lost his balance and done a superman dive/front flip over the counter and ended up in a crumpled heap behind the bar. This was about literally 10 seconds after getting through the entrance. He teaches children physics. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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