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Reasons to be Cheerful


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There's been a wee b*****d fly buzzing around our holiday chalet since we arrived yesterday and it's been doing my absolute nut in. I just splattered the fucker all over the patio door and I'm absolutely delighted. I can relax now. 

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30 minutes ago, Melanius Mullarkey said:

My mate just texted to remind me of when he got me a congratulations on your wedding card from Jimmy Calderwood and friends. Must dig it out later.

I bet it arrived in a Tan Envelope..

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19 minutes ago, Rugster said:

There's been a wee b*****d fly buzzing around our holiday chalet since we arrived yesterday and it's been doing my absolute nut in. I just splattered the fucker all over the patio door and I'm absolutely delighted. I can relax now. 

Thanks to the "Great Newton Mearns Fly Infestation" of 2017, i've become almost ninja-like in my swift and devastating take down technique.  What I've discovered is that rather than going after the little shits with a rolled up magazine or newspaper, a tea towel, viciously flicked, gives you a longer reach, stuns them and allows you to deliver the Bruce Lee denouement whilst they lie stunned on the floor.  

Edited by KnightswoodBear
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1 minute ago, Melanius Mullarkey said:

It was thon "barbecue's" fault.

I ignored your previous attempt to bait me regarding my barbeque and this fly matter.  It's frankly beneath you and it saddens me to see you brought so low.

Edited by KnightswoodBear
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5 minutes ago, KnightswoodBear said:

Thanks to the "Great Newton Mearns Fly Infestation" of 2017, i've become almost ninja-like in my swift and devastating take down technique.  What I've discovered is that rather than going after the little shits with a rolled up magazine or newspaper, a tea towel, viciously flicked, give you a longer reach, stuns them and allows you to deliver the Bruce Lee denouement whilst they lie stunned on the floor.  

I fucking hate them. Seriously if I was in the Mearns I would have moved out until that was cleared up. 

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Just now, Rugster said:

I fucking hate them. Seriously if I was in the Mearns I would have moved out until that was cleared up. 

A work colleague also advised that they are unable to fly away from the suction of a vacuum cleaner, so you could jump about the house like a poundshop Ghostbuster, which was also fun. 

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31 minutes ago, Rugster said:

There's been a wee b*****d fly buzzing around our holiday chalet since we arrived yesterday and it's been doing my absolute nut in. I just splattered the fucker all over the patio door and I'm absolutely delighted. I can relax now. 

Butlin's isn't what it used to be, eh?

21 minutes ago, Melanius Mullarkey said:

When's the return leg?

It was last week. Can't believe you missed it. :(

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