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Tryfield

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Sleep easy folks!

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That's got to be the worst of these yet. Can you imagine the conversation involved in OKing that for publication? They'd have been better off giving the work experience girl the space to publish some of her haiku.

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WHo says all drivers are wankers?

MAN DENIES SEX ACT WHILE DRIVING CAR

Wayne Kerr, 45, of Westcroft Road, Mid Craigie, Dundee, allegedly carried out a sex act whilst driving a car. Kerr denies that on December 12 2011 at Cairnie Road, St Madoes, on the westbound A90 Dundee-Perth road, that while driving a car he conducted himself in a disorderly manner, while in a state of undress, by carrying out a private sex act, and committing a breach of the peace.

http://www.eveningtelegraph.co.uk/2016/01/08/man-denies-sex-act-while-driving-car/

Typo, that I've fixed, surely?

Also, I'm disappointed that the term Chinese helicopter pilot, wasn't shoehorned, into the article.

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https://uk.news.yahoo.com/mother-claims-mcdonalds-fat-shamed-daughter-140327092.html

"An irate mother has slammed McDonalds staff for fat-shaming her teenage daughter, claiming they openly laughed at the girl for ordering six cheeseburgers."

By the nick of her these burgers must be a bit moreish.

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https://uk.news.yahoo.com/mother-claims-mcdonalds-fat-shamed-daughter-140327092.html

"An irate mother has slammed McDonalds staff for fat-shaming her teenage daughter, claiming they openly laughed at the girl for ordering six cheeseburgers."

And of course, if your teenage daughter is embarrassed by one person the first thing you do is call the media to make sure as many people as possible hear about her embarrassment. Teenagers just love having embarrassing incidents broadcast to the world.

However, given that Momma is also a whale, I suspect there's isn't a whole lot of shame about anything much at all in this family. Here's what Ma Pig has to say about son Jack, (10). "I have trouble getting Jack to eat so when he says he wants something I let him have it." What are the odds that Jack too, is a Fuckinormasaurous?

Finally, there's the minor inconvenience that McDonalds security footage show this incident never happened. Attention whores looking for attention. And probably money. Or at least, free cheeseburgers.

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However, given that Momma is also a whale, I suspect there's isn't a whole lot of shame about anything much at all in this family. Here's what Ma Pig has to say about son Jack, (10). "I have trouble getting Jack to eat so when he says he wants something I let him have it." What are the odds that Jack too, is a Fuckinormasaurous?

I think he will be the opposite, he will see fat mess 1 and 2 and think f**k that, I'm not eating, I'm not wanting to end up looking like that.
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Bet you're all gutted you didn't get to read the company intranet article that alerted me to this one: http://www.manchestereveningnews.co.uk/whats-on/manchester-evening-news-makes-appearance-10719261

And this has to be the most tenuous David Bowie one going: http://www.croydonadvertiser.co.uk/Old-Coulsdon-man-delivered-David-Bowie-s-milk/story-28505240-detail/story.html

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