The Master Posted September 9, 2016 Share Posted September 9, 2016 Hoe on roof. https://www.eveningtelegraph.co.uk/fp/fire-crews-remove-hoe-nightclub-roof/ 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shandon Par Posted September 9, 2016 Share Posted September 9, 2016 37 minutes ago, The Master said: Hoe on roof. https://www.eveningtelegraph.co.uk/fp/fire-crews-remove-hoe-nightclub-roof/ " It was feared the hoe could have fallen several feet to the ground injuring passers by. " 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KnightswoodBear Posted September 9, 2016 Share Posted September 9, 2016 52 minutes ago, The Master said: Hoe on roof. https://www.eveningtelegraph.co.uk/fp/fire-crews-remove-hoe-nightclub-roof/ Lack of a quote from the hoe is disappointing. "Eh wis just oot tae Greggs fur a peh, and a c**t on a jetpack picked is up and flung me oan the roof ae the clubbie. Eh wis like "Wits goan on?" and he wis like "Wha's in cherge here? Yassssssss!! That's whit em talkin aboot!!!!" c**t hud a fair whiff eh stovies and Special aboot him, ye ken?" 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Njord Posted September 12, 2016 Share Posted September 12, 2016 Sgt Wilson finally gets the move of his dreams, although its a fair hike in rental for him. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GordonD Posted September 12, 2016 Share Posted September 12, 2016 If they really wanted the house to look like Hitler they'd get rid of the Pole in the garden. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Njord Posted September 12, 2016 Share Posted September 12, 2016 I was assuming that was the straight arm going up.... 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hedgecutter Posted September 13, 2016 Share Posted September 13, 2016 National news: sheep rescued http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-scotland-37343777 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zen Archer (Raconteur) Posted September 13, 2016 Share Posted September 13, 2016 (edited) 3 minutes ago, Hedgecutter said: National news: sheep rescuedhttp://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-scotland-37343777 Yup, we've heard that one before. A climbing instructor has gone to the aid of a sheep Edited September 13, 2016 by Zen Archer spelling 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shandon Par Posted September 14, 2016 Share Posted September 14, 2016 I think this was mentioned on another thread but The Scottish Sun gets the in depth story on the post-wedding Montrose offie rammy, including a nice pic of the blushing bride with her 3 litre bottle of White Strike: http://www.thescottishsun.co.uk/scotsol/homepage/news/7235805/I-was-just-sticking-up-for-my-new-hubby-Bride-locked-up-on-wedding-night-reveals-her-side-of-the-story.html 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cardinal Richelieu Posted September 14, 2016 Share Posted September 14, 2016 1 hour ago, Shandon Par said: I think this was mentioned on another thread but The Scottish Sun gets the in depth story on the post-wedding Montrose offie rammy, including a nice pic of the blushing bride with her 3 litre bottle of White Strike: http://www.thescottishsun.co.uk/scotsol/homepage/news/7235805/I-was-just-sticking-up-for-my-new-hubby-Bride-locked-up-on-wedding-night-reveals-her-side-of-the-story.html I think the real news story here is that you can still get absolutely smashed for only £4. And here's me going to work like an utter mug. Again. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KnightswoodBear Posted September 14, 2016 Share Posted September 14, 2016 2 hours ago, Shandon Par said: I think this was mentioned on another thread but The Scottish Sun gets the in depth story on the post-wedding Montrose offie rammy, including a nice pic of the blushing bride with her 3 litre bottle of White Strike: http://www.thescottishsun.co.uk/scotsol/homepage/news/7235805/I-was-just-sticking-up-for-my-new-hubby-Bride-locked-up-on-wedding-night-reveals-her-side-of-the-story.html You just know that once he gets out the tin pail, one of the two of them will be dead by the others hand within six months. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shandon Par Posted September 14, 2016 Share Posted September 14, 2016 51 minutes ago, Cardinal Richelieu said: I think the real news story here is that you can still get absolutely smashed for only £4. And here's me going to work like an utter mug. Again. £4 is probably less a panini and a coffee. Now you know what to treat yourself to for lunch every day. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zen Archer (Raconteur) Posted September 14, 2016 Share Posted September 14, 2016 2 hours ago, Shandon Par said: I think this was mentioned on another thread but The Scottish Sun gets the in depth story on the post-wedding Montrose offie rammy, including a nice pic of the blushing bride with her 3 litre bottle of White Strike: http://www.thescottishsun.co.uk/scotsol/homepage/news/7235805/I-was-just-sticking-up-for-my-new-hubby-Bride-locked-up-on-wedding-night-reveals-her-side-of-the-story.html There's definitely a fart coming and a high probability of follow through. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KnightswoodBear Posted September 14, 2016 Share Posted September 14, 2016 I've not drunk cheap cider since I was a pup, but I'd imagine that after about 2l of that 3l bottle i'd probably be lying in a pool of my own piss and shit. Incidentally, the German christmas market that pops up in St Enoch Square every year and sells the cider with the cinnamon and all that keech in it for £4 a whip? They really should be more careful not to let the public see the cases of White Lightning stacked up round the back when one of the barmen nips out for a fag. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shandon Par Posted September 14, 2016 Share Posted September 14, 2016 5 minutes ago, Zen Archer said: There's definitely a fart coming and a high probability of follow through. I think the groom has already followed through. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The_Kincardine Posted September 14, 2016 Share Posted September 14, 2016 Absolute shocker from West Dunbartonshire Council: http://www.scotsman.com/news/politics/scots-council-bosses-tried-to-stop-kids-playing-hopscotch-1-4227234 I am offended. The game is actually peever. Our culture is under a tack. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shandon Par Posted September 16, 2016 Share Posted September 16, 2016 (edited) Recently we saw the Glasgow cabbie who tried to get girls to pee in the back of his cab. Turns out he was one of the better ones. The Scottish Sun reports bans this week for Glasgow cabbies who.. One Raped a passenger, one raped and stalked a passenger, one got into a rammy with a pedestrian and ran him over (charged with attempted murder), one who was done for homophobic abuse and running over a passenger, another rapist, and a final rapist who also threatened the husband and child of the woman he raped. Edited September 16, 2016 by Shandon Par 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tongue_tied_danny Posted September 17, 2016 Share Posted September 17, 2016 On 14/09/2016 at 06:15, Shandon Par said: I think this was mentioned on another thread but The Scottish Sun gets the in depth story on the post-wedding Montrose offie rammy, including a nice pic of the blushing bride with her 3 litre bottle of White Strike: http://www.thescottishsun.co.uk/scotsol/homepage/news/7235805/I-was-just-sticking-up-for-my-new-hubby-Bride-locked-up-on-wedding-night-reveals-her-side-of-the-story.html I actually witnessed this incident last week. I didn't realise it had made the news until now though. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GordonD Posted September 18, 2016 Share Posted September 18, 2016 When he sobers up, his first words will be, "MARRIED? What the hell are you talking about?" 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
die hard doonhamer Posted September 26, 2016 Share Posted September 26, 2016 Headline of the week. Bravo. https://www.thecourier.co.uk/news/local/perth-kinross/233118/perthshire-scientists-premature-ejaculation-treatment-cant-come-quickly-enough/ 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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