Sergeant Wilson Posted May 2, 2016 Share Posted May 2, 2016 Achieve immortality by getting on my deadpool team. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bobby Skidmarks Posted May 2, 2016 Share Posted May 2, 2016 Save money on Fathers Day cards by smothering your dad with a pillow. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bully Wee Villa Posted May 2, 2016 Share Posted May 2, 2016 Create that realistic cinema feeling by sitting really close to the telly and charging yourself £10 for a bowl of warm Doritos. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ya Bezzer! Posted May 2, 2016 Share Posted May 2, 2016 Convince everyone you are 'the greatest fan in the world' by sitting in bored silence in a half empty stadium. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bully Wee Villa Posted May 2, 2016 Share Posted May 2, 2016 Save wasting money on a trip to Dignitas by reading through the Word Association Thread. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ya Bezzer! Posted May 2, 2016 Share Posted May 2, 2016 Convince everyone you 'are the people' by worshiping a gay man on a horse who has had no relevance in the 18th, 19th, 20th or 21st centuries. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bully Wee Villa Posted May 2, 2016 Share Posted May 2, 2016 Create the Aston Villa season ticket experience at none of the cost by inviting your neighbours round to laugh while you repeatedly bang your head against a wall. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tom Rogic Posted May 2, 2016 Share Posted May 2, 2016 (edited) Feel like doing yourself in but lack the bottle to go through with it? Move to the leafy South Carbrain area in Cumbernauld and within a day or two you will have no problem with taking a header out of your fourth floor flat window onto the needle strewn concrete path below Edited May 2, 2016 by Tom Rogic 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cardinal Richelieu Posted May 2, 2016 Share Posted May 2, 2016 Fun-size Mars Bars make ideal normal sized Mars Bars for dwarves. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tom Rogic Posted May 2, 2016 Share Posted May 2, 2016 Ease the pain of a close relative dying by entering TV's X Factor and automaticaly securing a place in the live show part of the competition 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cardinal Richelieu Posted May 2, 2016 Share Posted May 2, 2016 Normal sized Mars Bars make ideal fun-sized Mars Bars for giants. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FlyerTon Posted May 2, 2016 Share Posted May 2, 2016 (edited) With SKY putting their prices up (again) next month, provided your 1 year contract is up, you can ditch it and plug the two antenna cables into one of these and save yourself up to £900 per year. Humax-hdr-1100s 1TB Edited May 2, 2016 by FlyerTon 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cardinal Richelieu Posted May 2, 2016 Share Posted May 2, 2016 Normal-sized Mars Bars make ideal king-sized Mars Bars for dwarves. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tom Rogic Posted May 2, 2016 Share Posted May 2, 2016 Enhance your chances of becoming president of the USA by glueing two Shredded Wheat on to your head and being a racist imbecile 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cardinal Richelieu Posted May 2, 2016 Share Posted May 2, 2016 King-sized Mars Bars make ideal normal-sized Mars Bars for giants. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tom Rogic Posted May 2, 2016 Share Posted May 2, 2016 Deep fried fun sized Mars Bars make ideal normal sized Mars Bars for dwarves with cholesterol figures on a par with the population of China -1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tamdunk Posted May 2, 2016 Share Posted May 2, 2016 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sergeant Wilson Posted May 2, 2016 Share Posted May 2, 2016 Meet people you don't like and have avoided for the best part of 40 years by organising a school reunion. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bobby Skidmarks Posted May 2, 2016 Share Posted May 2, 2016 Teach people you only know through an internet forum a lesson by stalking them via Facebook and posting a girly rant when they don't invite you out for a drink even though they're in another country. Also, refer to the incident as #belfastgate 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bert Raccoon Posted May 2, 2016 Share Posted May 2, 2016 Paedophiles, although abhorrent disgusting individuals, make excellent pool partners. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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