paranoid android Posted August 26, 2016 Share Posted August 26, 2016 Just now, The_Kincardine said: Has as much credibility as the 'slug gun' story TBH. What's that one? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The_Kincardine Posted August 26, 2016 Share Posted August 26, 2016 Just now, paranoid android said: What's that one? Similar to yours...a bloke up before the beak for using an air rifle. The Sheriff asked what a slug gun was and the boy's brief declaimed it was a weapon for shooting...well...slugs. No doubt there are funnier versions online. Humour isn't my strong suit. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tamthebam Posted August 26, 2016 Share Posted August 26, 2016 well, if we're going to recite hoary old legal tales: An old Sheriff at Perth was an ex-military officer and was well known for being lenient on soldiers and former servicemen. An accused had pled guilty to a breach of the peace while pished. The Defence agent said "My Lord, my client pleads guilty. He is normally of good character and was previously a soldier who served at Tobruk..." Sheriff replies "Well, there can be no question about sentence. He served his country in North Africa and I grant this brave man an absolute discharge." Turning to the accused the Sheriff said "I too served at Tobruk. What was your regiment?" The accused looks at the Sheriff, smiles and replies "Mein Herr, I was with der Afrika Korps....." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
welshbairn Posted August 26, 2016 Share Posted August 26, 2016 20 minutes ago, tamthebam said: well, if we're going to recite hoary old legal tales: An old Sheriff at Perth was an ex-military officer and was well known for being lenient on soldiers and former servicemen. An accused had pled guilty to a breach of the peace while pished. The Defence agent said "My Lord, my client pleads guilty. He is normally of good character and was previously a soldier who served at Tobruk..." Sheriff replies "Well, there can be no question about sentence. He served his country in North Africa and I grant this brave man an absolute discharge." Turning to the accused the Sheriff said "I too served at Tobruk. What was your regiment?" The accused looks at the Sheriff, smiles and replies "Mein Herr, I was with der Afrika Korps....." Sergeant Wilson got about a bit in those days. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sergeant Wilson Posted August 27, 2016 Share Posted August 27, 2016 18 minutes ago, welshbairn said: Sergeant Wilson got about a bit in those days. Not Perth though, Muirton and McDiarmid excepted...and a log cabin somewhere near it. We're all friends now, that's all that matters, let bygones be bygones. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bold Rover Posted August 27, 2016 Share Posted August 27, 2016 An eager young lawyer was trying to get his client a non-custodial sentence, pleading to the judge: "The Sword of Damacles hangs over the accused." Unimpressed, the benchman pronounced sentence and: "It's a pity he didn't think of that when he took the Knife of Stanley down his victim's cheek." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CityDave Posted August 27, 2016 Share Posted August 27, 2016 8 hours ago, tamthebam said: well, if we're going to recite hoary old legal tales: An old Sheriff at Perth was an ex-military officer and was well known for being lenient on soldiers and former servicemen. An accused had pled guilty to a breach of the peace while pished. The Defence agent said "My Lord, my client pleads guilty. He is normally of good character and was previously a soldier who served at Tobruk..." Sheriff replies "Well, there can be no question about sentence. He served his country in North Africa and I grant this brave man an absolute discharge." Turning to the accused the Sheriff said "I too served at Tobruk. What was your regiment?" The accused looks at the Sheriff, smiles and replies "Mein Herr, I was with der Afrika Korps....." I automatically read that the first time as if it was the Goon Show with Harry Secombe (defence agent), Peter Sellers (Sheriff) and Spike Milligan as the defendant. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WaffenThinMint Posted August 27, 2016 Share Posted August 27, 2016 57 minutes ago, CityDave said: I automatically read that the first time as if it was the Goon Show with Harry Secombe (defence agent), Peter Sellers (Sheriff) and Spike Milligan as the defendant. You rotten swine! It would probably have had Major Dennis Bloodnok or Neddie Seagoon as the judge, with Grytpype-Thynne as the shifty defence lawyer and Eidelberger the defendent. That story may indeed have something to do with the Goons, as Spike Milligan made a joke about Thatcher dropping a coin into some London beggar's hat when she saw the sign next to it reading "Homeless Veteran of Falkland's War" - only for the teary eyed veteran to reply, "muchas gracias!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tamthebam Posted August 27, 2016 Share Posted August 27, 2016 very off topic but I heard about this the other day and wondered if it was a Dutch cousin of Henry Crun... https://www.penguin.co.uk/books/289216/the-secret-diary-of-hendrik-groen-83-years-old/ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NorthernLights Posted August 29, 2016 Share Posted August 29, 2016 Georgia judge loses it over vulgar courtroom exchange And the guys behind Rick & Morty have acted it out for our pleasure... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NorthernLights Posted October 6, 2016 Share Posted October 6, 2016 On 29/08/2016 at 18:52, NorthernLights said: Georgia judge loses it over vulgar courtroom exchange And the guys behind Rick & Morty have acted it out for our pleasure... Someone did a proper animated version... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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