UsedToGoToCentralPark Posted June 3, 2021 Share Posted June 3, 2021 Somehow it's my fault there are no tea bags in the house even though I don't drink tea or do the shopping. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
madwullie Posted June 3, 2021 Share Posted June 3, 2021 2 hours ago, Florentine_Pogen said: ^^^"Ur you sayin' ah'm f*ckin' fat noo.????????" First response. Sounds like this might be a gender-wide feature/bug 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jacksgranda Posted June 3, 2021 Share Posted June 3, 2021 2 hours ago, mathematics said: Mrs Mathematics is in the huff with me for buying the dog bull’s testicles to eat. The bull will be in more of a huff, imho 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MONKMAN Posted June 3, 2021 Share Posted June 3, 2021 7 hours ago, Craig the Hunter said: Mine has decided that she doesn't want to get the train home from work any more. So I'm picking her up every night which is adding 15/20 minutes onto me getting home. I don't actually mind that too much, but now she's moaning that she's working 10 hours a week above her contracted hours. She knows I finish at least an hour after she does, but is willingly waiting around to get picked up. Totally her call that she's working these extra hours, but still moaning like f**k about it. People who work over and above their contracted hours for no additional compensation should not be trusted, that's a red flag right there. 9 hours ago, hk blues said: To answer your question though, I'd take a shower and get changed before eating even a take away - I like it piping hot so would need to heat up in any event. When we order home delivery food now we order early in the day so It's sorted and then eat it according to our feeling rather than the delivery schedule. It's not like it's cordon bleu food that's going to suffer if it's heated up anyway This is probably the most mental post I've seen on this thread, which is certainly something considering the competition. 8 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Melanius Mullarkey Posted June 3, 2021 Share Posted June 3, 2021 3 hours ago, madwullie said: I'll let you lads guess how well that went down. “Aw thanks babe. I’ll go along for a few weeks so ah can look ma best fur ye”? Spoiler 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Busta Nut Posted June 3, 2021 Share Posted June 3, 2021 "Did you notice the blinds are broke?" I did not and let her know this. "I dunno how this happened" I do. We have a blackout cover we sometimes stick up that sucker cups onto the window and sticks down. I've watched her rip it off the window. I know she's caught the blinds on it and almost snapped them off. She must think I am fucking stupid. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Distant Doonhamer Posted June 3, 2021 Share Posted June 3, 2021 "Did you notice the blinds are broke?" I did not and let her know this. "I dunno how this happened" I do. We have a blackout cover we sometimes stick up that sucker cups onto the window and sticks down. I've watched her rip it off the window. I know she's caught the blinds on it and almost snapped them off. She must think I am fucking stupid.She may or may not think you’re stupid. She possibly feels happy that you aren’t going to call out her bullshit though. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Busta Nut Posted June 3, 2021 Share Posted June 3, 2021 6 minutes ago, Distant Doonhamer said: She may or may not think you’re stupid. She possibly feels happy that you aren’t going to call out her bullshit though. I just couldn't be bothered. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sugar_Army Posted June 4, 2021 Share Posted June 4, 2021 Me: Been out in my car working from 9am and get home at 7pm. Her: Been working from home ( which when she decides, can include driving in her car to countryside and hiking for an hour as a lunch break) and leaves all the dishes for me to do as soon as I get in. Me: gets luggage out attic for packing as going away for weekend. Her: "Why did you not put petrol in my car and check the tyre pressure for going away this weekend?," Me: "Well it is your car and has been sitting at the front door all day with the keys in your handbag while I have been out knocking my pan in. Why not try putting your degree in accountancy to use by transferring money to the bills account and fill it up, then use your degree in engineering to figure out how to attach a an air hose to a tyre valve." Apparently I am and arsehole now. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GordonS Posted June 4, 2021 Share Posted June 4, 2021 9 hours ago, madwullie said: Anything to do with her weight is a fucking minefield laid on poison tipped shards of aids infected broken glass and barbed wire. She's always been v slim. She's 41 now and lockdown and two weans have led to her putting on a minuscule amount of weight. Other women definitely definitely wish they were as skinny as her. Anyway, I noticed a slimming world class is starting in the local area once restrictions lift. She's been complaining about being fat (she isn't) and her clothes not fitting her anymore (they do) and all that usual shit. Yes she's put on a tiny tiny bit of weight but it's genuinely not much at all. Half a stone absolute maximum. Anyway, simply sent her a WhatsApp pointing out that class was starting again (she'd actually been previously to shift some baby weight (again, definitely the thinnest person there). I'll let you lads guess how well that went down. I literally winced reading that. Mate, you need to consider the possibility that this was a shite bit of husbanding. Don't ever, ever do anything to suggest you think your wife is fat. Don't even agree with her when she's literally the size of a house and she wants you to agree that she's fat. This is the first law of women. Going so far as to suggest they actually lose weight... well, it's your funeral. 9 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GordonS Posted June 4, 2021 Share Posted June 4, 2021 15 hours ago, Jimmy Shaker said: - I go to get (or gets on the way home from work) a takeaway and tells her in advance - f**k all is done because she's not looked up from Candy Crush in twenty minutes, and my arrival causes surprised noises as if Michael Aspel has appeared from backstage to surprise Ronnie Corbett to start an episode of This Is Your Life. Every. Single. Time. Genuine apologies if this is out of order, but regularly losing track of time like that is a classic sign of ADHD or Aspergers, both of which are harder to spot in women anyway. I mean, she might just be lazy but I've got first hand experience of this one. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GordonS Posted June 4, 2021 Share Posted June 4, 2021 On 31/05/2021 at 19:02, pandarilla said: Too much content on your laptop, eh? Surely there's a gif for this... 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Arabdownunder Posted June 4, 2021 Share Posted June 4, 2021 Asks my opinion on what she should say to her batshit mental sisters in response to some shite on their WhatsApp group. Apparently IDGAF is not a valid opinion. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hk blues Posted June 4, 2021 Share Posted June 4, 2021 (edited) 10 hours ago, Mr. Alli said: This is fucking mental! Probably so, I already said I'm an outlier. That said, I think it's a good look. Edited June 4, 2021 by hk blues 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hk blues Posted June 4, 2021 Share Posted June 4, 2021 8 hours ago, MONKMAN said: This is probably the most mental post I've seen on this thread, which is certainly something considering the competition. I'm honoured (although sceptical) 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jimmy Shaker Posted June 4, 2021 Share Posted June 4, 2021 3 hours ago, GordonS said: Genuine apologies if this is out of order, but regularly losing track of time like that is a classic sign of ADHD or Aspergers, both of which are harder to spot in women anyway. I mean, she might just be lazy but I've got first hand experience of this one. It has got absolutely f**k all to do with anything other than her being a lazy bollix. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hk blues Posted June 4, 2021 Share Posted June 4, 2021 13 hours ago, madwullie said: Anything to do with her weight is a fucking minefield laid on poison tipped shards of aids infected broken glass and barbed wire. She's always been v slim. She's 41 now and lockdown and two weans have led to her putting on a minuscule amount of weight. Other women definitely definitely wish they were as skinny as her. Anyway, I noticed a slimming world class is starting in the local area once restrictions lift. She's been complaining about being fat (she isn't) and her clothes not fitting her anymore (they do) and all that usual shit. Yes she's put on a tiny tiny bit of weight but it's genuinely not much at all. Half a stone absolute maximum. Anyway, simply sent her a WhatsApp pointing out that class was starting again (she'd actually been previously to shift some baby weight (again, definitely the thinnest person there). I'll let you lads guess how well that went down. I can see at least 5 or 6 major problems in that relatively short post. Please tell me this was a one-off? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jacksgranda Posted June 4, 2021 Share Posted June 4, 2021 4 hours ago, Arabdownunder said: Asks my opinion on what she should say to her batshit mental sisters in response to some shite on their WhatsApp group. Apparently IDGAF is not a valid opinion. Doesn't matter what you say - it's a trap. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rugster Posted June 4, 2021 Share Posted June 4, 2021 15 hours ago, madwullie said: Anything to do with her weight is a fucking minefield laid on poison tipped shards of aids infected broken glass and barbed wire. She's always been v slim. She's 41 now and lockdown and two weans have led to her putting on a minuscule amount of weight. Other women definitely definitely wish they were as skinny as her. Anyway, I noticed a slimming world class is starting in the local area once restrictions lift. She's been complaining about being fat (she isn't) and her clothes not fitting her anymore (they do) and all that usual shit. Yes she's put on a tiny tiny bit of weight but it's genuinely not much at all. Half a stone absolute maximum. Anyway, simply sent her a WhatsApp pointing out that class was starting again (she'd actually been previously to shift some baby weight (again, definitely the thinnest person there). I'll let you lads guess how well that went down. There are easier ways to instigate a divorce mate. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Honest_Man#1 Posted June 4, 2021 Share Posted June 4, 2021 1 hour ago, hk blues said: I can see at least 5 or 6 major problems in that relatively short post. Please tell me this was a one-off? What are the 5 or 6 major problems? I can only see one, where he recommends going to Slimming World. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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