MEADOWXI Posted July 2, 2017 Share Posted July 2, 2017 An army of snakes? On a train? Snakes..on a train? There was an air traffic control strike at the time 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dons_1988 Posted July 2, 2017 Share Posted July 2, 2017 Most annoying when she calls time to log out of P&B. She says how sad I am chatting about football on an open forum for hours on end, she does not know this thread exists. [emoji4] This says more about you than her to be honest 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sergeant Wilson Posted July 2, 2017 Share Posted July 2, 2017 11 hours ago, Bobby Skidmarks said: I'll take Waffenthinmint with Philpy @ E/W Cheers Gunther, after his wife tries to send a help message via Pie and Bovril. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Naitch Posted July 2, 2017 Share Posted July 2, 2017 3 hours ago, Sergeant Wilson said: Gunther, after his wife tries to send a help message via Pie and Bovril. Gunther is married? You'd think he'd have mentioned something like that. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dee Man Posted July 2, 2017 Author Share Posted July 2, 2017 15 hours ago, hellbhoy said: Most annoying when she calls time to log out of P&B. She says how sad I am chatting about football on an open forum for hours on end, she does not know this thread exists. Is this your mum or your wife you're talking about? If you go onto www.testicles.com you should get yourself a pair there. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hedgecutter Posted July 2, 2017 Share Posted July 2, 2017 Directions in the car. Me: "Keep following this road until I say otherwise. Her "left here?" Me: "No, a while yet". Her (10 secs later): Left here?? Repeat. Same applies to "take next left, just where that red car is coming out now". "This one?""Yes""You sure?""Yes!!!" 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
welshbairn Posted July 2, 2017 Share Posted July 2, 2017 1 minute ago, Hedgecutter said: Directions in the car. Me: "Keep following this road until I say otherwise. Her "left here?" Me: "No, a while yet". Her (10 secs later): Left here?? Repeat. Same applies to "take next left, just where that red car is coming out now". "This one?" "Yes" "You sure?" "Yes!!!" You do sound a bit officious tbf. She's probably just teasing. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The_Kincardine Posted July 2, 2017 Share Posted July 2, 2017 6 minutes ago, Stinky Bone said: She pisses me off every Sunday by not making dinner. Usually I have to settle for a Pot Noodle or Super Noodles, even though there is a Chicken or Beef in the fridge. WTF, it's not BBQ weather so I won't be cooking, get in the kitchen and make me food. This Sunday I have a nice bit of brisket waiting to be slow cooked. I could get off of my arse and make it but I don't want her to think she is getting above her station. As usual I will have to make Sunday dinner myself. She has bought me a real treat, a pizza called sloppy giuliano. Can't help but think that when I am at work tomorrow, some greaseball pasta eater will be eating my brisket. Think I will come home early tomorrow and if I see any Italian/Sicilian/Mafia types in my home I will go Corleone on them. Those greasy c***s are not getting my beef. So much misogyny and racism in one post. Away and watch your Love Thy Neighbour box set if you haven't worn it out already. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dons_1988 Posted July 2, 2017 Share Posted July 2, 2017 She pisses me off every Sunday by not making dinner. Usually I have to settle for a Pot Noodle or Super Noodles, even though there is a Chicken or Beef in the fridge. WTF, it's not BBQ weather so I won't be cooking, get in the kitchen and make me food. This Sunday I have a nice bit of brisket waiting to be slow cooked. I could get off of my arse and make it but I don't want her to think she is getting above her station. As usual I will have to make Sunday dinner myself. She has bought me a real treat, a pizza called sloppy giuliano. Can't help but think that when I am at work tomorrow, some greaseball pasta eater will be eating my brisket. Think I will come home early tomorrow and if I see any Italian/Sicilian/Mafia types in my home I will go Corleone on them. Those greasy c***s are not getting my beef. Wow 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cerberus Posted July 2, 2017 Share Posted July 2, 2017 She pisses me off every Sunday by not making dinner. Usually I have to settle for a Pot Noodle or Super Noodles, even though there is a Chicken or Beef in the fridge. WTF, it's not BBQ weather so I won't be cooking, get in the kitchen and make me food. This Sunday I have a nice bit of brisket waiting to be slow cooked. I could get off of my arse and make it but I don't want her to think she is getting above her station. As usual I will have to make Sunday dinner myself. She has bought me a real treat, a pizza called sloppy giuliano. Can't help but think that when I am at work tomorrow, some greaseball pasta eater will be eating my brisket. Think I will come home early tomorrow and if I see any Italian/Sicilian/Mafia types in my home I will go Corleone on them. Those greasy c***s are not getting my beef. HEY!I'm not greasy I just sweat a lot. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zen Archer (Raconteur) Posted July 2, 2017 Share Posted July 2, 2017 46 minutes ago, Stinky Bone said: She pisses me off every Sunday by not making dinner. Usually I have to settle for a Pot Noodle or Super Noodles, even though there is a Chicken or Beef in the fridge. WTF, it's not BBQ weather so I won't be cooking, get in the kitchen and make me food. This Sunday I have a nice bit of brisket waiting to be slow cooked. I could get off of my arse and make it but I don't want her to think she is getting above her station. As usual I will have to make Sunday dinner myself. She has bought me a real treat, a pizza called sloppy giuliano. Can't help but think that when I am at work tomorrow, some greaseball pasta eater will be eating my brisket. Think I will come home early tomorrow and if I see any Italian/Sicilian/Mafia types in my home I will go Corleone on them. Those greasy c***s are not getting my beef. It seems to me that there are two lazy b*****ds in your household. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
whiskychimp Posted July 2, 2017 Share Posted July 2, 2017 1 hour ago, Stinky Bone said: This Sunday I have a nice bit of brisket waiting to be slow cooked. I could get off of my arse and make it If you are going to get off youre arse and slow cook it you'll be eating pretty damn late. Should have made that decision at lunch time sloppy giuliano. Not even a real pizza Those greasy c***s are not getting my beef 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rugster Posted July 2, 2017 Share Posted July 2, 2017 Doesn't look like a sloppy giuliano to me. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
whiskychimp Posted July 2, 2017 Share Posted July 2, 2017 19 minutes ago, Stinky Bone said: I love women, too much it seems. Still waiting for oven to preheat. Imbecile 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stellaboz Posted July 2, 2017 Share Posted July 2, 2017 Why don't you hunt like the rest of us? Fucking lazy chunt. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cerberus Posted July 2, 2017 Share Posted July 2, 2017 I had to kill chickens when I was a nipper cause my mum didn't like to.All we had was a small BB gun which didn't kill the chicken quickly unless you could catch them and fire straight into the head. The easiest way was to fire 5 or 6 rounds as quickly as possible into them.You then had to then pluck the feathers.Horrible.Why didn't we just go to KFC? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The_Kincardine Posted July 2, 2017 Share Posted July 2, 2017 39 minutes ago, Cerberus said: I had to kill chickens when I was a nipper cause my mum didn't like to. All we had was a small BB gun which didn't kill the chicken quickly unless you could catch them and fire straight into the head. The easiest way was to fire 5 or 6 rounds as quickly as possible into them. FFS. Barbaric ways to slaughter an animal thread for this shite. You'd be the second poster after the bloke who tried to kill coos with a lump hammer. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EH75 Posted July 3, 2017 Share Posted July 3, 2017 Her: "can we watch a film?" Me "aye, what do you fancy?" Her "I don't mind you pick" Me *suggestion of many films* Her "hmm don't fancy that how about we watch [the latest shite Adam Sandler has produced/some chick flick]" She will immediately spend the first half hour of the film on her phone before falling asleep, on me, with the controller just out of reach. Every. Single. Fucking. Time. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mizfit Posted July 3, 2017 Share Posted July 3, 2017 Her: "can we watch a film?" Me "aye, what do you fancy?" Her "I don't mind you pick" Me *suggestion of many films* Her "hmm don't fancy that how about we watch [the latest shite Adam Sandler has produced/some chick flick]" She will immediately spend the first half hour of the film on her phone before falling asleep, on me, with the controller just out of reach. Every. Single. Fucking. Time. Saturday afternoon we chucked Netflix on, I suggested something lighthearted and easy, (the longest yard, anchorman, that sort of thing), she put Adulthood on after much meaning, turned it off after 20 minutes when I started getting into it because "I'm not feeling it". Every damn time. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The_Craig Posted July 3, 2017 Share Posted July 3, 2017 She moans like f**k at me for being noisy and waking the weans up before I go to work. So I try to creep about like a cat burglar and keep noise to a minimum or if I'm an early start, I'll get up and get a shower in work.This morning, her, the weans and subsequently I, have been up since 6am. She didn't take it well when I blamed the drone of her fucking hairdryer, the 'click-click-click' of her fucking straighteners or her emptying the cupboard under the stairs for her work bag. Cue a massive barney, her fucking off in a huff and me left with a tired, grumpy 4 year old who wants to wear her roller skates and a grumpy 10 month old who's needing a sleep. The annoying thing is the double fucking standards. She moans like f**k when I leave the tap running but can't understand why I complain about the hairdryer. This will rumble on all week. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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