KnightswoodBear Posted July 3, 2017 Share Posted July 3, 2017 (edited) My wife fell asleep on the couch last night and when I went to bed I tried waking her and convincing her to come up the stairs as well. This went on for about 10 minutes until I gave up. Half 4 this morning she finally wakes up and decides to come up the stairs, waking me up and then telling me how sore her neck is because I let her sleep for so long on the couch. Edit: if the situation had been reversed and I'd came up and woken her up, divorce proceedings would have started first thing in the morning. Edited July 3, 2017 by KnightswoodBear 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
54_and_counting Posted July 3, 2017 Share Posted July 3, 2017 1 hour ago, The_Craig said: She moans like f**k at me for being noisy and waking the weans up before I go to work. So I try to creep about like a cat burglar and keep noise to a minimum or if I'm an early start, I'll get up and get a shower in work. This morning, her, the weans and subsequently I, have been up since 6am. She didn't take it well when I blamed the drone of her fucking hairdryer, the 'click-click-click' of her fucking straighteners or her emptying the cupboard under the stairs for her work bag. Cue a massive barney, her fucking off in a huff and me left with a tired, grumpy 4 year old who wants to wear her roller skates and a grumpy 10 month old who's needing a sleep. The annoying thing is the double fucking standards. She moans like f**k when I leave the tap running but can't understand why I complain about the hairdryer. This will rumble on all week. oh thats a tricky one to deal with, well only tricky if you cannot decide what hand to curl up into a fist and lamp her one with, my missus moans when i put my phone light on at 5am when i am getting ready for work, i get one day off a week and you can be sure when she gets up the fucking curtains are not only opened, im sure she actually rips them off the fucking rail, all the while sky news is fucking blaring from the next room i hate mornings in my house 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The_Craig Posted July 3, 2017 Share Posted July 3, 2017 It's the double standards that does my tits in. I get a smug message while I'm at work saying how good her lie in was because the weans didn't get up until half 9. Aye, that's because I got organised to leave the house at quarter to six to get washed and eat breakfast at work so I didn't wake you all up, because I know how much of a handful the weans are. Whereas she thinks that she's being quiet with the click-click-fuckingclick of those b*****d straighteners but doesn't really give a f**k. No doubt, she'll send me an apologetic message later with a stupid fucking smiley before we do it all again tomorrow.Yippee. [emoji58] 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Minertaur Posted July 3, 2017 Share Posted July 3, 2017 Started to watch Riviera last night. About 2 minutes in she asks "who's that?" when a guy appeared on screen. Literally the first time he'd been on screen how the hell am I meant to know? She then sat on Whatsapp messaging her pals while the story continued. About 3/4 of the way through the episode she says "oh so are they all brother and sisters?" Considering they were at the funeral of their Dad about 10 minutes ago then I'm going to wager that they are related somehow. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blootoon87 Posted July 3, 2017 Share Posted July 3, 2017 I don't know why all of you put up with that shite. Everyone likes their hole, but I don't think it's worth that amount of hassle. Have a w**k FFS. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sweet Pete Posted July 3, 2017 Share Posted July 3, 2017 Never closes any fucking doors. Drives me cuckoo-bing-bong-bananas. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sergeant Wilson Posted July 3, 2017 Share Posted July 3, 2017 14 hours ago, Stinky Bone said: OK, I will bite. Rabbit with a little bit of carrot, slow cooked, with some wild garlic is very tasty. Make sure you get all the hairs off it first or they will stick in your teeth. Roe deer. Living in Deeside there are plenty to choose from. Very tasty with home grown carrots etc. 2 to name but few. ^^^Other vegetables are available. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ross. Posted July 3, 2017 Share Posted July 3, 2017 1 hour ago, The Minertaur said: Started to watch Riviera last night. About 2 minutes in she asks "who's that?" when a guy appeared on screen. Literally the first time he'd been on screen how the hell am I meant to know? I get that shit all the time when watching movies or TV. If I answer, she tells me she wasn't really asking, just thinking aloud, and if I don't answer she thinks I'm am ignorant c**t. The other one is "Why did they do/say that?" as if I am supposed to know the whole fucking movie before watching it. On the hypocrisy thing, it's her attitude to drinking that does my head in. If we had dinner and shared 2 bottles of wine, it would be cultured. If I go to the pub and hammer in 10 pints in a few hours I'm a jakey b*****d. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DeeTillEhDeh Posted July 4, 2017 Share Posted July 4, 2017 I'll take Waffenthinmint with Philpy @ E/W Cheers WTF has probably already killed his other half. [emoji48] 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DeeTillEhDeh Posted July 4, 2017 Share Posted July 4, 2017 It seems to me that there are two lazy b*****ds in your household. No. One lazy b*****d - him. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DeeTillEhDeh Posted July 4, 2017 Share Posted July 4, 2017 It's the double standards that does my tits in. I get a smug message while I'm at work saying how good her lie in was because the weans didn't get up until half 9. Aye, that's because I got organised to leave the house at quarter to six to get washed and eat breakfast at work so I didn't wake you all up, because I know how much of a handful the weans are. Whereas she thinks that she's being quiet with the click-click-fuckingclick of those b*****d straighteners but doesn't really give a f**k. No doubt, she'll send me an apologetic message later with a stupid fucking smiley before we do it all again tomorrow.Yippee. [emoji58] You really don't like those straighteners do you? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hedgecutter Posted July 4, 2017 Share Posted July 4, 2017 Ahead of us heading out somewhere for a particular time, she'll run late and spend ages in the bathroom before giving me a grand 10 mins for the whole shit, shave, shower and brushing of teeth. Then I'll get the "you ready yet, we need to go soon!". That or "don't take the bus to the station, I'll give you a lift in", only to end up running late and having me sweat about missing my train / coach. My mum is awful for the latter, where if a train station is 15 mins away, she'll leave at 6:03 for a 6:15 train, usually ending up stuck behind a tractor, horse box or Sunday driver. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The_Craig Posted July 4, 2017 Share Posted July 4, 2017 You really don't like those straighteners do you? If you were to hear how she uses them, you'd end up doing time. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Minertaur Posted July 4, 2017 Share Posted July 4, 2017 28 minutes ago, Hedgecutter said: That or "don't take the bus to the station, I'll give you a lift in", only to end up running late and having me sweat about missing my train / coach. My mum is awful for the latter, where if a train station is 15 mins away, she'll leave at 6:03 for a 6:15 train, usually ending up stuck behind a tractor, horse box or Sunday driver. This x 1000. Yesterday I had the dentist at half 8. Was offered a lift half way which would leave me a half hour walk at about 8ish. Decided against it and walked the hour walk. I was bang on time for the dentist while she was 10 minutes late for her work. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
whiskychimp Posted July 4, 2017 Share Posted July 4, 2017 41 minutes ago, Hedgecutter said: Ahead of us heading out somewhere for a particular time, she'll run late and spend ages in the bathroom before giving me a grand 10 mins for the whole shit, shave, shower and brushing of teeth. Then I'll get the "you ready yet, we need to go soon!". The exact opposite with the same result. We need to get ready to go. I'll suggest she goes first as it takes her longer. She moans about always having to get ready first and that she's watching Bargain Hunt I then go first and am ready an hour early, sitting uncomfortably in a shirt and tie. She is late. Every time. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
whiskychimp Posted July 4, 2017 Share Posted July 4, 2017 Using the washing machine to store dirty laundry. This means when I'm washing whites I have to empty and sort the stuff that is in the machine. Use the washing basket. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Widge Posted July 4, 2017 Share Posted July 4, 2017 I've got the opposite issue, she always has to be super early for everything. For example and whilst it doesn't affect me, she'll always try and be half an hour early for work, or if she has a train to catch wants to be there half an hour in advance. Not so much an issue, but when I'm wanting an extra half hour in my scratcher because I know I'll still be on time, I get moaned at. [emoji23] 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KnightswoodBear Posted July 4, 2017 Share Posted July 4, 2017 6 hours ago, DeeTillEhDeh said: WTF has probably already killed his other half. Has it not been already confirmed that WTM is Bible John? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nsr Posted July 4, 2017 Share Posted July 4, 2017 Pulled a muscle in my back and could barely walk last night. Went for a pish in the middle of the night, staggering painfully there and back, only for her to automatically bellow out "Did you put the seat down when you were done?" No I did not. You're lucky I could even lean down to reach the flusher. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sweet Pete Posted July 4, 2017 Share Posted July 4, 2017 Has it not been already confirmed that WTM is Bible John? It has, yes. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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