The Worst Posters in P&B History (2017 Edition)

[throbber]

As do you, you were just as bad in the aftermath.

I am impervious to shame.

[Rugster]

8 minutes ago, throbber said:

 

I am impervious to shame.

 

Must be the practice.

[LiviLion]

6 hours ago, PB 4.2 said:

My parish priest touched me once.  

 

But it was absolutely fine.  He just ruffled my hair and said "peace be with you, son" I reciprocated and said "and also with you".   I hope he's found that peace now that he's dead.

Was he an attractive man at the time?

[Monkey Tennis]

4 hours ago, Melanius Mullarkey said:

*Practise

Wrong.

[PB 4.2]

5 hours ago, throbber said:

I really enjoyed that song.

Did the subject matter resonate?  

[Miguel Sanchez]

Who wants an entry tonight?

[Arthur Orton]

1 minute ago, Miguel Sanchez said:

Who wants an entry tonight?

Are you referring to the list?

[Boostin' Kev]

What a lazy c**t that Miguel Sanchez is.

[Miguel Sanchez]

In 10th place with 28 points:

In 2012, Rangers Football Club died. While that summer was one of great intrigue and hilarity another of Scotland's biggest clubs was facing its own need for self-reflection and self-improvement. Carrying on their proud tradition of making a complete arse of everything Hibernian had just lost another Scottish Cup final, to their biggest rival, by a humiliating score of 5-1. The subsequent few years have seen the clubs inextricably linked, with Hibs ripping the utter piss out of the thing calling itself Rangers on multiple occasions. From the 14-15 season when the two clubs found themselves in Scotland's second tier to even this season with them both back in the top flight, you can generally always count on Hibs to cause some sort of North Korea-esque statement to be flung down the marble staircase.

We all have our favourite moment of Hibs breaking Rangers...

... but for this entry we actually return to their first meeting in the Championship: http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/football/29305945 Hibs fans may remember this image:

 

While this match started the proud tradition of Hibs bodying Rangers at every opportunity it was the birth of a truly modern classic on P&B.

 

Your hilarity starts here:

It's genuinely worth reading the next few pages before the fabled 411 is documented for evermore on page 52. There's a peculiar variety of Rangers support (who's still left) on P&B who is seemingly unable to differentiate between negative and positive attention, believing the collective joy shared as we laugh at their failures to somehow be a poor reflection on us rather than a legitimate acknowledgment of just how much the average diddy detests the Old Firm and everything they do to Scottish football. It also seems blissfully aware of how prone to moments of hilarity Rangers have been since that fateful summer. As for your thoughts:

"Self appointed *** wrangler so nominated to cover the rest of them, and the man himself wears a thin veil of decency which regularly slips revealing a bitter old bigot who sees himself as somehow above the majority of posters."

"I hope he is able to get the help that he needs."

"The one person on this thread that needs to seek professional mental health & alcohol help"

"Provides harrowing window into the life of an alcoholic."

Yes, beginning the rundown of the top ten (he likes to quantify things with lists, and he believes I can't count) we have @The_Kincardine, the absolute antithesis of a popular and successful P&B poster. What can we say about Kinky? "self appointed *** wrangler" is my favourite description of anyone on this list. You can tell when he spews out half a thesaurus when talking about football and starts trying to be overly sympathetic with his fellow Rangers fans, it's put on. It's forced. Here is a man plainly sure of his own intelligence and superiority being forced to defend and argue the merits of noted luminaries like bennett and thepundit, and it never works. His loyalty to his team and supporters of it blinds him to the plain fact that 99% of all criticism aimed at these targets is demonstrably justifiable.

This isn't his worst quality though. The apparent alcohol-fuelled posting isn't even a reason for criticism, and I'll avoid posting that Toilet Duck gif. It's when Kinky wheels out the "this is what any sensible-minded person thinks" spiel in the political forum that I really wonder. There's always a fine line between attempting to be seen as a calm and reasonable voice of experience on various matters, then the mask slips and the the sort of thing you expect from a Rangers fan of his vintage seeps out. Distasteful I think is the best way I can describe his general posting profile, as any redeeming qualities you might think he has will always be overshadowed sooner or later - even if it's just a result of inviting bennett's opinion on literally anything. The sheer volume of Kinky's efforts saw him deservedly rack up the points, and he shows little sign of stopping. Much unlike his team, which is quite amusing.

[Miguel Sanchez]

I was tempted to tag all of my fellow 411 club members but it might take a while.

[Arthur Orton]

7 minutes ago, Miguel Sanchez said:

I was tempted to tag all of my fellow 411 club members but it might take a while.

A fair few of them are gone.  

[DeeTillEhDeh]

I thought The Gincardine would have been further up.

[Am Featha Taigh Nan Clach]

Generic poster - 'I thoroughly enjoyed my trip to Outer Mongolia'

The Gincardine - 'I used to have sex with a petit Outer Mongolian woman'

[Jimmy85]

Mental that there’s 9 posters worse than the alcoholic bigot. I’d suggest every one of the top 10 should be executed. 

Just an idea I’m putting out there. It’s not set in stone. 

[Sergeant Wilson]

2 minutes ago, Am Featha *****h Nan Clach said:

Generic poster - 'I thoroughly enjoyed my trip to Outer Mongolia'

The Gincardine - 'I used to have sex with a petit Outer Mongolian woman'

There's enough material in there to get banned a hundred times over, if you responded.

[heedthebaa]

I can’t say I see a lot of Kincardine’s posts, but I’ve never got the alcoholic thing with him. It always seemed to me it was a typical P+B thing to say about an older poster that won’t bite in a heads gone type of way. Of course if anyone can show some evidence he’s a plonky, fair enough 

[DeeTillEhDeh]

Mental that there’s 9 posters worse than the alcoholic bigot. I’d suggest every one of the top 10 should be executed. 
Just an idea I’m putting out there. It’s not set in stone. 

Better watch out - Oaksoft will try to get you sacked.

[emoji3]

[Mark Connolly]

One thing's for sure, he won't be bothered.

[J_Stewart]

Can't wait for his response, as he uses the terms "sweetie wives" and "trope" 714 times each per paragraph. That's always a delight.

[LiviLion]

He'll come across as a good sport about this IMO.

For the first couple posts, then it'll go the same way it always does.