LinkedIn thread

[ICTChris]

Do any P&Bers use professional networking site LinkedIn? I have an account but haven’t logged in for more than five years. I might reconsider though, having seen these screen grabs

 

 

“Back to executing”. Calm down Pierrepoint.

 

This is my favourite though

 

 

Up at 3:30am and then off to the gym for *four hours*. Four fucking hours. Mate.

 

Any other P&Bers keen on inspiring corporate jargon slogans? Please share.

[The OP]

I hardly look at due to the overabundance of “didnae happen” stories and uplifting quotes. Seems to mainly consist of recruitment consultants sending copied and pasted pms and the people who run the app telling me about jobs which would be a big step down.

[Melanius Mullarkey]

Lots of "People passionistas" and "Wantrepreneurs".

Spoiler

 

Edited August 6, 2018 by Melanius Mullarkey

[The OP]

Oh and “congratulations on your work anniversary” should definitely never ever be a thing.

[Melanius Mullarkey]

Wish "some unknown c**t you accepted an invitation from by accident" a happy birthday.

[Guest bernardblack]

I use it for work...begrudgingly.

The amount of motivational shite and personal stuff on there is horrific.

“Success starts by waking up at 4am”

Does it aye?

[paranoid android]

Folk who take work that seriously aren't to be trusted. 

[Melanius Mullarkey]

Just now, paranoid android said:

Folk who take work that seriously aren't to be trusted. 

^^^^kens

[J_Stewart]

LinkedIn is the worst parts of social media all rolled in to one. Bullshitters, braggers and boring b*****ds everywhere. It’s a cesspit of people trying to impress with corporate jargon and utter lies. Anyone that posts on it that isn’t a recruiter or actively looking for a job should be ignored and avoided at all costs. These are the worst people on the planet, such as this example:



Complete and utter worstcunts. I fucking despise it.

[Dr Watson]

Coincidentally, I woke up at 3.30am too.

Went for a jobby and got back up at 7am.

[Richey Edwards]

I regularly wake up at 4AM, go for a pish then lie in my bed for about half an hour, sometimes have a w**k then go back to sleep. I'm probably doing this in the wrong order but I don't care.

[Lisa Cuddy]

It showed me a job I might be interested in earlier. A consultant at the Golden Jubilee. 

 

I'm considering my options. 

[paranoid android]

I often have a pish, a w**k, and a shite without waking up - doesn't affect my work, which is probably why is sleep so soundly. 

[supermik]

About 5 houses ago I said hello to a neighbor a couple of times. At least once a month I get a notification saying that he has linked me to some group or other. Twat!

[welshbairn]

2 hours ago, J_Stewart said:

LinkedIn is the worst parts of social media all rolled in to one. Bullshitters, braggers and boring b*****ds everywhere. It’s a cesspit of people trying to impress with corporate jargon and utter lies. Anyone that posts on it that isn’t a recruiter or actively looking for a job should be ignored and avoided at all costs. These are the worst people on the planet, such as this example:



Complete and utter worstcunts. I fucking despise it.
 

A good father would have said : "Ollie, first it's 'written down' and second it's 'obviously'. You're no son of mine, get out of the fucking car." It's the only way they'll learn.

[Cerberus]

Do any P&Bers use professional networking site LinkedIn? I have an account but haven’t logged in for more than five years. I might reconsider though, having seen these screen grabs
 

 
“Back to executing”. Calm down Pierrepoint.
 
This is my favourite though
 

 
Up at 3:30am and then off to the gym for *four hours*. Four fucking hours. Mate.
 
Any other P&Bers keen on inspiring corporate jargon slogans? Please share.

Any organisation that uses gmail as corporate email can be classed as a 2 bob outfit.

[AL-FFC]

I do use it mainly to keep in touch with some former workmates for other jobs which come up now and again but its getting more like FB (another load of sh*te).

[Shandon Par]

11 hours ago, ICTChris said:

 

Do any P&Bers use professional networking site LinkedIn? I have an account but haven’t logged in for more than five years. I might reconsider though, having seen these screen grabs

 

 

“Back to executing”. Calm down Pierrepoint.

 

This is my favourite though

 

 

Up at 3:30am and then off to the gym for *four hours*. Four fucking hours. Mate.

 

Any other P&Bers keen on inspiring corporate jargon slogans? Please share.

 

Think I've logged in to mine about 3 times. Was amazed at the amount of folk I don't like or have fallen out with who had sent me whatever they call friend requests. Also funny seeing people you know to be utter charlatans and fiends presenting this "professional" image. It's like a premium version of Facebook for folk that are still able to get their arses off the sofa.

[Fullerene]

12 hours ago, ICTChris said:

 

Do any P&Bers use professional networking site LinkedIn? I have an account but haven’t logged in for more than five years. I might reconsider though, having seen these screen grabs

 

 

“Back to executing”. Calm down Pierrepoint.

 

This is my favourite though

 

 

Up at 3:30am and then off to the gym for *four hours*. Four fucking hours. Mate.

 

Any other P&Bers keen on inspiring corporate jargon slogans? Please share.

 

I thought airport security was one of these places where you can't use your phone.

They must have been screaming at him.  I bet he was pulled aside and stripped searched as a potential terrorist.

Does he mention anything about that? 

[Honest_Man#1]

11 hours ago, J_Stewart said:

LinkedIn is the worst parts of social media all rolled in to one. Bullshitters, braggers and boring b*****ds everywhere. It’s a cesspit of people trying to impress with corporate jargon and utter lies. Anyone that posts on it that isn’t a recruiter or actively looking for a job should be ignored and avoided at all costs. These are the worst people on the planet, such as this example:



Complete and utter worstcunts. I fucking despise it.
 

That’s one of the worst made up stories I’ve seen. If my 7 year old child said he was desperate to get into the office as he’d designed an app and wanted to write down the plans, I’d tell him he needs to find some mates and go kick about a football.