ICTChris Posted October 5, 2019 Share Posted October 5, 2019 Fair enough, even if your virtue signalling was all in vain.The example given above isn’t virtue signalling though. If you see your friends wife cheating on him and then tell him you aren’t doing it to signal your virtue to anyone else. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Robin.Hood Posted October 5, 2019 Share Posted October 5, 2019 What would you say if he told you if was f**k all to do with you and that you knew nothing of his home life situation?He is your mate though right , I mean I can speak to my mates more or less about anything so something like this I'd be able to get off my chest. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sjc Posted October 5, 2019 Share Posted October 5, 2019 2 minutes ago, G_Man1985 said: 58 minutes ago, sjc said: What would you say if he told you if was f**k all to do with you and that you knew nothing of his home life situation? He is your mate though right , I mean I can speak to my mates more or less about anything so something like this I'd be able to get off my chest. I love how everyone seems to think rational thinking applies in situations of this nature..... I'd also throw in drink, drug, gambling habits........some people just don't want to admit even to themselves that they have a problem. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sjc Posted October 5, 2019 Share Posted October 5, 2019 10 minutes ago, ICTChris said: The example given above isn’t virtue signalling though. If you see your friends wife cheating on him and then tell him you aren’t doing it to signal your virtue to anyone else. It was more in reply to the "give him a good shake" comment....... you're right though, virtue signalling isn't probably the correct terminology. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sjc Posted October 5, 2019 Share Posted October 5, 2019 14 minutes ago, DA Baracus said: Relationships are built on trust. If you can get past infidelity then fair play, but once doubt comes in it becomes like a cancer. It's so hard to shake and will make you question everything. To an extent they are, after years of taking one another for granted and going through the motions they can evolve into being built of habit and/or familiarity. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mark Connolly Posted October 5, 2019 Share Posted October 5, 2019 9 minutes ago, G_Man1985 said: He is your mate though right , I mean I can speak to my mates more or less about anything so something like this I'd be able to get off my chest. Some folk would be really uncomfortable knowing this sort of information, and it would eat away at them. Their mates would probably notice something was bothering them, so what are they going to say when asked what's up? "Sorry Stevie, nothing is bothering me. Here Davie, Stevie's Mrs is cheating on him." 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Robin.Hood Posted October 5, 2019 Share Posted October 5, 2019 I love how everyone seems to think rational thinking applies in situations of this nature..... I'd also throw in drink, drug, gambling habits........some people just don't want to admit even to themselves that they have a problem.This wasnt the scenario ?One thing I've found with guys ( this is a personal opinion ) but I find when it comes to guys we dont really open up, usually just bottle it up.Seen a thing on a tayside police where somebody was missing , yet the weird thing to that story is he was actually in carsview ( only reason I know this is because my mum is still in there ).I found speaking up helps me through life. Might have right answers, might have wrong answers but I know at end of it, it will be alright .If my mate was cheating on his mrs I'd be disappointed., however I'd speak to him first and see what the script was. He may tell me to f**k off ( already been mentioned ) however I'd like to think if he is my mate he wouldn't and we would talk.I've mates ( close mates ), then I have football mates n work mates.Last two I wouldn't get involved with 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sjc Posted October 5, 2019 Share Posted October 5, 2019 11 minutes ago, G_Man1985 said: This wasnt the scenario ? One thing I've found with guys ( this is a personal opinion ) but I find when it comes to guys we dont really open up, usually just bottle it up. Seen a thing on a tayside police where somebody was missing , yet the weird thing to that story is he was actually in carsview ( only reason I know this is because my mum is still in there ). I found speaking up helps me through life. Might have right answers, might have wrong answers but I know at end of it, it will be alright . If my mate was cheating on his mrs I'd be disappointed., however I'd speak to him first and see what the script was. He may tell me to f**k off ( already been mentioned ) however I'd like to think if he is my mate he wouldn't and we would talk. I've mates ( close mates ), then I have football mates n work mates. Last two I wouldn't get involved with I agree with a lot the points you make, particularly the ones about a lot of men bottling things up and not talking. This is even more the case the further back the generations you go in my opinion. As I stated earlier, I've raised my head above the parapet before with a good friend whose girlfriend was cheating on him and paid the penalty. My best mate no longer speaks with his own sister after he told her about her husband doing the dirty. Self righteousness aside, the loss of a good friendship still makes sad. And I know my best mate feels this way about the breakdown of his relationship with his sister. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Robin.Hood Posted October 5, 2019 Share Posted October 5, 2019 I agree with a lot the points you make, particularly the ones about a lot of men bottling things up and not talking. This is even more the case the further back the generations you go in my opinion. As I stated earlier, I've raised my head above the parapet before with a good friend whose girlfriend was cheating on him and paid the penalty. My best mate no longer speaks with his own sister after he told her about her husband doing the dirty. Self righteousness aside, the loss of a good friendship still makes sad. And I know my best mate feels this way about the breakdown of his relationship with his sister. Losing friendships is always sad, few guys from school I use to make an effort with but then I kinda figured why should I always be the one making the effort so now we rarely chat which is fine as I have other friends. I dont know your mate but there is always ways to make amends, it's just whether we choose to do so. We are on this planet only once so let's make the best of it. But moral of the story is cheating is wrong and usually it comes with consequences and it's up to the person how to deal with it all. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sergeant Wilson Posted October 5, 2019 Share Posted October 5, 2019 (edited) 31 minutes ago, G_Man1985 said: Losing friendships is always sad, few guys from school I use to make an effort with but then I kinda figured why should I always be the one making the effort so now we rarely chat which is fine as I have other friends. I dont know your mate but there is always ways to make amends, it's just whether we choose to do so. We are on this planet only once so let's make the best of it. But moral of the story is cheating is wrong and usually it comes with consequences and it's up to the person how to deal with it all. Right ya cùnt, where is @G_Man1985 and what have you done with him? Edited October 5, 2019 by Sergeant Wilson 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
steelmen Posted October 5, 2019 Share Posted October 5, 2019 Always thought this was a strange set up...I used to work in Hamilton and the office manager (married) at the time always brought his brother in law with him (his sisters wife) to nights out. No big deal you might think but they would always go out on the pull afterwards. Heard they were quite successful too. Then they got caught pumping a typist from the work after a Christmas night out. Shit hit the fan after that as someone from work told the managers wife and her and her sister in law kicked them out. Heard the sister took her husband back but I’d left by that point so may not have happened.Can’t get my head round encouraging someone to cheat on your family like that. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BFTD Posted October 5, 2019 Share Posted October 5, 2019 Can’t get my head round encouraging someone to cheat on your family like that.It's like the serial killer thing; we like a partner to commit our horrible, deviant crimes with. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BFTD Posted October 5, 2019 Share Posted October 5, 2019 Hmm...apparently you can't edit posts on the app [emoji848] 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cerberus Posted October 7, 2019 Share Posted October 7, 2019 I couldn’t forgive anyone if they cheated on me.I also can’t understand men who get turned on by watching some other guy knobbing their wives/gf. Chick on chick is fine but not another guy. That messed up levels of emasculation. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DiegoDiego Posted October 8, 2019 Share Posted October 8, 2019 Interesting passage in the novel I'm reading about how Cossacks dealt with this sort of thing during WW1."What's wrong? Tell me.""You've been nursing a snake. You've been feeding a serpent. She's been playing about with Eugene.""Oh well.""A woman is like a cat. She'll rub up against anyone who strokes her. Here, have a cigarette."I'll try to remember such tact should I ever find myself in such a situation. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hearthammer Posted October 8, 2019 Share Posted October 8, 2019 24 minutes ago, DiegoDiego said: Interesting passage in the novel I'm reading about how Cossacks dealt with this sort of thing during WW1. "What's wrong? Tell me." "You've been nursing a snake. You've been feeding a serpent. She's been playing about with Eugene." "Oh well." "A woman is like a cat. She'll rub up against anyone who strokes her. Here, have a cigarette." I'll try to remember such tact should I ever find myself in such a situation. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Trackdaybob Posted October 8, 2019 Share Posted October 8, 2019 On 03/10/2019 at 19:18, Miguel Sanchez said: kinkshaming Is that a thing? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Miguel Sanchez Posted October 8, 2019 Share Posted October 8, 2019 4 minutes ago, Trackdaybob said: Is that a thing? I suppose you can shame people for anything. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ICTChris Posted October 8, 2019 Share Posted October 8, 2019 Just now, Miguel Sanchez said: I suppose you can shame people for anything. Shaming people for shaming others - shameshaming. Shaming people for kinkshaming others - shamekinkshaming. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Miguel Sanchez Posted October 8, 2019 Share Posted October 8, 2019 3 minutes ago, ICTChris said: Shaming people for shaming others - shameshaming. Shaming people for kinkshaming others - shamekinkshaming. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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