Coronavirus (COVID-19)

[DA Baracus]

I heard that the test for the virus is to chuck folk in a river. If they drown they're fine but if they float they have the virus and should be drowned.

[peasy23]

Saw a man load six litres of Smirnoff into his trolley earlier. That’s just commitment to the cause

Might have been the same guy I saw yesterday who had about sixty litres of Irn Bru.

[carpetmonster]

Well f**k it, I’ll have a crack:
This isn’t racist, but in Madagascar, as soon as you hit puberty the village headman ties you to a...
Hold on, will start again:
This isn’t racist, but instead of toilets, your average Goan shits in a...
Christ. Tougher than it looks.

In Scotland, if you're on a stag do as the groom, your peers will often tie you to a....


In Scotland, rugby playing private school types often shit into ..... because epic legend LOL LMFAO.

f**k off.

[vikingTON]

6 minutes ago, peasy23 said:

Might have been the same guy I saw yesterday who had about sixty litres of Irn Bru.

Vodka and Irn Bru is minging, I think I'd rather have coronavirus tbh.

[djchapsticks]

Just now, virginton said:

Vodka and Irn Bru is minging, I think I'd rather have coronavirus tbh.

Guy I used to work with (from Greenock, not a word of a lie) told me he'd once run out of mixers when round at a mate's.

His mate was convinced in the absence of decent mixer and it being 4am that vodka and tomato sauce would just taste the same as a Bloody Mary.

 

I'm told that it didn't.

[Tight minge]

I don't mean to be cheeky or insulting, but your opinion on who has handled this better than anyone else is worth as much as mine on who should be Pakistan's opening batsman.
Have you read the Imperial College report? It's only 16 pages. The epidemiologists here are very clear that suppressing the disease means having severe restrictions for 18 months. They modelled a suppression strategy for 5 months, and at the end of it you get a peak just as high as if you'd never done anything at all.
The strategy is to have cases come through at a level at which the NHS can cope. The authorities have various levers at their disposal to slow down or speed up transmission, and that's what they're pulling - see the table below. There was a shift in policy about a week ago because the modellers said that NHS capacity is going to be exceeded no matter what.
Epidemiology is very location and society- specific. Different countries will take different approaches at different times, for different reasons. 
There isn't sense to what Viking-ton says. It sounds like sense if you don't know anything, but a lot of epidemiology is counter-intuitive. If you didn't know better, flat earthers and climate change deniers would sound like they're talking sense too. Taking the opinions of some nobody on the internet - including and especially me - over actual epidemiologists is a mistake. 

Your not being cheeky or insulting, but as you say here, which is fair, that neither you or I really know, which is different from saying your wrong in the first place. It is a football forum after all.

I have happened to read the report. I have actually been following this since the start in January. What I am trying to dig at, and probably doing it badly, but as you mention The Imperial college. Back in January they were running data modelling and raising concerns (I allude to this way back at the start of the thread when it was just a handful of Asian based people looking over it). That’s when the government should have started planning. I believe it was discussed in parliament, but the usual posturing rather than action.

It was painfully obvious, as this is highly contagious, that it would likely hit Europe but it would appear no planning has been done.

I also agree in principle with the actions that are now been taken, but some of the knee jerk reactions here don’t help.

To be fair, I expected more off a bite on my virginton comments than the former but there were go. However after reading his childish and unnecessary comments to Moomintroll it kind of shows he has emotional issues and craves too much attention. Not sure what someone else does with their life is such a big thing for him.

So I have to retract my comments there as I am wholly wrong!

Quite sure as people seem to be going all heads gone here, there may be a few bans in bound, hopefully he will be amongst them.

[BawWatchin]

3 minutes ago, virginton said:

Irn Bru is minging, I think I'd rather have coronavirus tbh.

FTFYM8

#bringbackoldbru

[Shandon Par]

To:aynsley@gmfc.com

Hi Champ

I’m working overtime on P&B putting bitches straight about Coronavirus, Irn Bru and of course The Famous! As a result, I’m fast running low on gifs.

Fancy popping round later to take some new pics? Bring your big pepper grinder, olive oil and your menacing grin

Needs to be before 7pm as I’ve got to watch Dr Who then wash mum’s hair.

VT x

 

[Guest Moomintroll]

Might have been the same guy I saw yesterday who had about sixty litres of Irn Bru.

Ffs@G_Man1985

[Guest Moomintroll]

Vodka and Irn Bru is minging, I think I'd rather have coronavirus tbh.

You're doing this on purpose now, aren't you?

[carpetmonster]

Ffs[mention=17699]G_Man1985[/mention]

I thought Gman was off it since the recipe change? Maybe he's making a big statue with them that says 'Tesco punters are all c***s' to put in his front garden.

[Granny Danger]

25 minutes ago, bernardblack said:

Saw a man load six litres of Smirnoff into his trolley earlier. That’s just commitment to the cause

My missus was In Sainsbury’s earlier and could only get two bottles of cava, says the wine aisles looking a bit bare.

Fortunately we are always well stocked up but a couple of additional bottles might not go amiss.

 

[BawWatchin]

2 minutes ago, Granny Danger said:

My missus was In Sainsbury’s earlier and could only get two bottles of cava, says the wine aisles looking a bit bare.

Fortunately we are always well stocked up but a couple of additional bottles might not go amiss.

 

They'll go amiss now that the internet knows who took them.

[DA Baracus]

Corner shops are the key here lads. Not things like Spar but shops like Keystore, Best One, Alldays etc. 

[D.A.F.C]

ASDA donating £5M to food banks.

[BawWatchin]

Just now, D.A.F.C said:

ASDA donating £5M to food banks.

But will happily throw out £10M worth of perfectly edible food every day cause they're not allowed to give it away.

[superbigal]

On the barbers being open theme.

I've long since lost my flowing locks (I'm in my avatar)so just pop in for the 2 minute zero shearing.

In all my visits over the years to numerous establishments I dont think I've ever been sheared with clean cutters.

Should barbers and hairdressers be cleaning and sterilising there kit between punters ?

 

 

 

[Granny Danger]

From the BBC website.  This is w bit tragic:

More people have now died in Iran's Fars province from alcohol poisoning while trying to protect themselves from the coronavirus than from the disease itself, Iranian media report.

Mohammad Javad Moradian, the director of the province's emergency services centre, told Isna news agency that Covid-19 had killed 13 people in Fars, while 66 have died after drinking industrial-strength alcohol.

A persistent rumour in Iran claims that drinking alcohol helps protect individuals from contracting the virus.

[Detournement]

5 minutes ago, D.A.F.C said:

ASDA donating £5M to food banks.

The supermarkets have clearly been given a nod that they won't have to pay the entire amount of their delayed VAT bill. 

[Melanius Mullarkey]

6 minutes ago, DA Baracus said:

Corner shops are the key here lads. Not things like Spar but shops like Keystore, Best One, Alldays etc. 

This. All those years of popping in for a loaf, pint of milk and a few cans are now paying off for those “under the counter” items which you get handed to you in a brown paper bag.

Spoiler