Who will be the next permanent manager of the Conservatives?

[williemillersmoustache]

A room full of monsters clapping like lobotomised seals at another pair of monsters telling them lies about things they haven't done. 

Hosted by Nick Ferrari 

[ICTJohnboy]

1 minute ago, williemillersmoustache said:

A room full of monsters clapping like lobotomised seals at another pair of monsters telling them lies about things they haven't done. 

Hosted by Nick Ferrari 

 

Biggest round of applause of the night so far, has just come from Ferrari mentioning the name of the leader soon to be replaced.

Says it all.

[Granny Danger]

One of the by products of the Truss shit show is that Mogg will most likely retain a front bench bed post.  It beggars belief.

 

[H Wragg]

Jesus Christ! [emoji54]

[Boo Khaki]

https://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/politics/liz-truss-policies-police-crime-targets-b2131734.html

f**k me. Why has nobody thought of this before? Just tell the police to cut murders by 20% and bingo. Genius.

Actually, why not just tell them to cut 100% of all crime?

[BFTD]

5 minutes ago, Boo Khaki said:

https://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/politics/liz-truss-policies-police-crime-targets-b2131734.html

f**k me. Why has nobody thought of this before? Just tell the police to cut murders by 20% and bingo. Genius.

Actually, why not just tell them to cut 100% of all crime?

Simple; just record murders as "traumatic end-of-life events" until they're actually solved. Should knock a fair percentage off.

Not saying fewer murders wouldn't still be nice, but isn't violent crime still near an all-time low? I suppose no politician's been elected by saying, "hey, things aren't so bad; maybe don't worry so much".

[Fullerene]

17 minutes ago, Boo Khaki said:

Actually, why not just tell them to cut 100% of all crime?

That wouldn't work.  If they made it 100% this year, then it would need to be 110% next year, 120% the year after that.

Always looking to improve year on year.

[BFTD]

1 minute ago, Fullerene said:

That wouldn't work.  If they made it 100% this year, then it would need to be 110% next year, 120% the year after that.

Always looking to improve year on year.

Penny Mordaunt seemed to reanimate a few corpses on here, at least.

[Dan Steele]

8 hours ago, The Skelpit Lug said:

I see Truss has moved into the "how to dupe the regions"  part of the campaign. Wonder if she or Sunak will throw any crumbs up our way or have they both written Scotland off? 

Tory leadership frontrunner commits to building Liverpool-Hull line, nine months after government scaled back plans.

Oh, there we are 

The former chancellor said the Union is "under real risk" as he committed to being "more active" in delivering projects in Scotland in the event he wins the Tory contest.

[tamthebam]

If Truss really is that thick she'll want to be surrounded by the even worse to make her look good 

So a cabinet of Rees-Mogg, Priti, Christopher Chope, Fabricant...

 

 

...and Alistair Jack 

 

[Boo Khaki]

18 minutes ago, oaksoft said:

Virtually every industry in the country is suffering from staff shortages.

Companies looking for software engineers who can code in C for example are having to pay freelancers in excess of £50 to £60 per hour to get someone on board.

And Truss thinks that's OK because every other country is struggling for staff.

And then her big plan to resolve the staffing crisis is........that's right. To cut benefits. This absolute fucking idiot actually thinks there's an army of trained, experienced workers such as software engineers turning down jobs paying £80k to £120k per year because they'd rather sit at home on Universal Credit watching Bargain Hunt.

At this stage I'm beyond shock.

It's all about Four In A Bed and Ramsay's Kitchen Nightmares USA these days, at least, going by how Mrs Khaki "works" from home anyway.

[Theroadlesstravelled]

5 hours ago, oaksoft said:

Virtually every industry in the country is suffering from staff shortages.

Companies looking for software engineers who can code in C for example are having to pay freelancers in excess of £50 to £60 per hour to get someone on board.

And Truss thinks that's OK because every other country is struggling for staff.

And then her big plan to resolve the staffing crisis is........that's right. To cut benefits. This absolute fucking idiot actually thinks there's an army of trained, experienced workers such as software engineers turning down jobs paying £80k to £120k per year because they'd rather sit at home on Universal Credit watching Bargain Hunt.

At this stage I'm beyond shock.

 

It's a Tory crowd pleaser. Blame the immigants and benefit scroungers. 

 

[Fullerene]

6 hours ago, oaksoft said:

Virtually every industry in the country is suffering from staff shortages.

Companies looking for software engineers who can code in C for example are having to pay freelancers in excess of £50 to £60 per hour to get someone on board.

And Truss thinks that's OK because every other country is struggling for staff.

And then her big plan to resolve the staffing crisis is........that's right. To cut benefits. This absolute fucking idiot actually thinks there's an army of trained, experienced workers such as software engineers turning down jobs paying £80k to £120k per year because they'd rather sit at home on Universal Credit watching Bargain Hunt.

At this stage I'm beyond shock.

Grrr.  Now you have got me going.  I have to get up and go to work every morning while my neighbour doesn't.  I thought he was sitting at home watching "Bargain Hunt" and living on benefits.  Now you are telling me he might be a WFH C programmer (whatever that is) and earning more than me!  Makes my blood boil.  I would vote for you if you came to his house and scratched his car - except he doesn't have one.

Spoiler

#include "sarcasm.h"

 

[williemillersmoustache]

Ben Wallace incinerating his credentials and reputation as "the not a complete arsehole in cabinet" by coming out for Team Imbecile and trashing Team Thieving Little Shit. 

Also making it more and more certain that in September the UK will have its first functionally disfluent Prime Minister with the IQ of a shoe. 

[Benjamin_Nevis]

9 hours ago, oaksoft said:

And then her big plan to resolve the staffing crisis is........that's right. To cut benefits. This absolute fucking idiot actually thinks there's an army of trained, experienced workers such as software engineers turning down jobs paying £80k to £120k per year because they'd rather sit at home on Universal Credit watching Bargain Hunt.

I can't bring myself to watch these c***s beg for votes. Has she actually proposed cutting benefits during a cost of living crisis presumably as we go into winter? Fucking hell. 

3 hours ago, Theroadlesstravelled said:

 

It's a Tory crowd pleaser. Blame the immigants and benefit scroungers. 

 

The sheer irony of this, when a significant proportion of those choosing the next PM are of pension age, and as such are sitting at home, on a state benefit. What a country. 

[williemillersmoustache]

Oh wad some pow'r.....

 

 

[Boo Khaki]

Presumably those are Prada clownshoes, and a Claire's Accessories red nose?

[ICTJohnboy]

2 hours ago, williemillersmoustache said:

Ben Wallace incinerating his credentials and reputation as "the not a complete arsehole in cabinet" by coming out for Team Imbecile and trashing Team Thieving Little Shit. 

Also making it more and more certain that in September the UK will have its first functionally disfluent Prime Minister with the IQ of a shoe. 

 

Indeed.

I was actually going to say Wallace is generally regarded as one of the more sensible members of the government, but I t hink I prefer your choice of words.

This whole circus just beggars belief. 

[Blue Brazil Forever]

3 hours ago, williemillersmoustache said:

Ben Wallace incinerating his credentials and reputation as "the not a complete arsehole in cabinet" by coming out for Team Imbecile and trashing Team Thieving Little Shit. 

Also making it more and more certain that in September the UK will have its first functionally disfluent Prime Minister with the IQ of a shoe. 

Disfluent?? Should join glammorati as a non word.

[Salt n Vinegar]

6 minutes ago, Blue Brazil Forever said:

Disfluent?? Should join glammorati as a non word.

Oi, this forum is a valuable language resource for us in the patterati!