Melanius Mullarkey Posted January 10, 2023 Share Posted January 10, 2023 23 hours ago, GNU_Linux said: What the f**k did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I'll have you know I graduated top of my class in the SAS, and I've been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I'm the top sniper in the entire UK armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the f**k out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the world and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You're fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that's just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the UK army and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little "clever" comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn't, you didn't, and now you're paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You're fucking dead, kiddo. This is from "P&B: The Shawfield Shedboy years" isnt it? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blackislekillie Posted January 12, 2023 Share Posted January 12, 2023 I'll take a hammer tae ye. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Silvio Tattiescone Posted January 12, 2023 Share Posted January 12, 2023 I didn't really kill 25 Taliban. I captured them and held them for hours, whingeing and moaning about the problems in my life. Then they shot themselves. 8 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scottsdad Posted January 12, 2023 Share Posted January 12, 2023 John Crace has done a long one in the Guardian - very funny https://www.theguardian.com/books/2023/jan/12/i-was-alone-abandoned-with-only-a-hundred-million-in-the-bank-spare-digested-by-john-crace Quote In 1998 I went to Eton. I was outmatched. The teachers said I was thick. That was because they just asked the wrong questions. Willy ignored me. I begged him to help me. He just said I was too needy and should see a shrink. I said that I didn’t understand my lessons. That they felt like people were speaking in foreign languages. That’s your French class, Harold. I started smoking dope. Anything to numb the pain of reading this book. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Florentine_Pogen Posted March 27, 2023 Share Posted March 27, 2023 On 10/01/2023 at 11:53, hk blues said: Now, that makes sense. He can read ?........ 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hk blues Posted March 28, 2023 Share Posted March 28, 2023 7 hours ago, Florentine_Pogen said: He can read ?........ Possibly not but he could surely lip sync? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Silvio Tattiescone Posted March 28, 2023 Share Posted March 28, 2023 9 hours ago, Florentine_Pogen said: He can read ?........ He runs his fingers over the words and "hears" the sounds in his head. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bennett Posted May 17, 2023 Share Posted May 17, 2023 The Duke of Hazzard. Prince Harry, Meghan and her mother were involved in a "near catastrophic car chase" involving paparazzi, a spokesperson for the prince has said. The incident happened after the Duke and Duchess of Sussex attended an awards ceremony in New York on Tuesday. In a statement, the prince's spokesperson said the "relentless pursuit" lasted for over two hours 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cosmic Joe Posted May 17, 2023 Share Posted May 17, 2023 1 hour ago, bennett said: The Duke of Hazzard. Prince Harry, Meghan and her mother were involved in a "near catastrophic car chase" involving paparazzi, a spokesperson for the prince has said. The incident happened after the Duke and Duchess of Sussex attended an awards ceremony in New York on Tuesday. In a statement, the prince's spokesperson said the "relentless pursuit" lasted for over two hours This is going to be magnificent. The Harry and Meghan haters v the Conspiracy Theorists 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bigmouth Strikes Again Posted May 17, 2023 Share Posted May 17, 2023 Should've took the private jet instead, these pair of morons get right on my tits. 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lucyintheskywithdiamonds Posted May 17, 2023 Share Posted May 17, 2023 2 minutes ago, Bigmouth Strikes Again said: Should've took the private jet instead, these pair of morons get right on my tits. They go through me tbf. I think it’s all about the publicity with both of them despite them saying they’re trying to avoid the press they do a tell all interview,a Netflix series and a tell all book hardly trying to stay under the radar. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scottsdad Posted May 17, 2023 Share Posted May 17, 2023 1 minute ago, Lucyintheskywithdiamonds said: They go through me tbf. I think it’s all about the publicity with both of them despite them saying they’re trying to avoid the press they do a tell all interview,a Netflix series and a tell all book hardly trying to stay under the radar. 6 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mark Connolly Posted May 17, 2023 Share Posted May 17, 2023 While I agree with the general sentiments that they are a couple of arseholes, I can also see why he might have been concerned at being chased by paparazzi given what happened to his maw 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bigmouth Strikes Again Posted May 17, 2023 Share Posted May 17, 2023 Just drive slowly back to your palace and let them take pictures, what's the fucking problem? Wouldn't give a monkeys if I had that amount of cash. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Silvio Tattiescone Posted May 17, 2023 Share Posted May 17, 2023 A 2 hr chase through packed New York streets? Here they are making an emergency handbrake turn. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lucyintheskywithdiamonds Posted May 17, 2023 Share Posted May 17, 2023 11 minutes ago, Mark Connolly said: While I agree with the general sentiments that they are a couple of arseholes, I can also see why he might have been concerned at being chased by paparazzi given what happened to his maw Completley understand that he may have concern around it because of what happened to his mum however why throw yourselves into the lions den with the lifestyle they are leading over there? I think they were chased perhaps for 10 minutes or so but being chased around the streets or Manhattan for two hours is a gross exaggeration on their part. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shotgun Posted May 18, 2023 Share Posted May 18, 2023 1. The paparazzi aren’t that interested in them. Why would they be? They’re B list celebrities at best 2. There’s no way in hell you can chase anyone in car around New York for 2 hours. You’d be lucky to cover 50 yards without stopping. 3. If there ‘was’ a high speed chase going on in any American city, there would be police road blocks set up within minutes. 4. As well as live footage from news helicopters. Instead, the major media outlets are using terms like “alleged” and casting doubt on the story. If they’re covering it at all 5. They’re a couple of lying liars who lie. 7 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fullerene Posted May 18, 2023 Share Posted May 18, 2023 You guys have no heart. Imagine it is the middle of the night, you are tired and all you want to do is get to bed. Instead you are stuck in a New York Taxi cab for two hours being chased around Manhattan, maybe very slowly but chased all the same. The taxi driver has just divorced his wife, is struggling to find a place to stay, has had to move in with his kid brother who has never worked a day in his life but has a wife and three kids and a yappy dog in some crummy apartment in Brooklyn. Imagine having to listen to his life story for the next two hours! The coronation sounds more exciting than that. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
101 Posted May 18, 2023 Share Posted May 18, 2023 5 hours ago, Shotgun said: The paparazzi aren’t that interested in them. Why would they be? They’re B list celebrities at best Considering the British press has such a hard on for them I don't think this is the case. Sadly. It being America I don't know why they didn't just shoot the pap, probably wouldn't even make the news over there. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sugna Posted May 18, 2023 Share Posted May 18, 2023 17 hours ago, bennett said: In a statement, the prince's spokesperson said the "relentless pursuit" lasted for over two hours Stopping after a finite period of time ("lasted") is the very definition of relenting. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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