ICTChris Posted January 12, 2007 Share Posted January 12, 2007 My itinary this weekend: - Tell my boss in the next ten minutes I'm handing my notice in and leaving in a week - Pack away all my possessions into boxes - Get a bus out to Sighthill (tin hat on) and pick up a van - Drive van to flat, load in massive dressing table - Drive van to future mother-in-laws house, unload and put away huge dressing table - Drive van and future mother-in-law to flat, load up boxes - Drive to new flat, unpack boxes, arrnage possessions. I have a sneaky feeling I may be back on teh fags by the end of this weekend, I'll probably be found in the Hibbee bar that is now my local comatose on Sunday morning. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gaz Posted January 12, 2007 Share Posted January 12, 2007 People who do a pish in a public toilet then walk straight out withoutwashing thier hands..... Maybe they feel that their own manhood has less germs than the taps in a public toilet, which after all are touched by people who've just done a sh*te? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Larsson. Posted January 12, 2007 Share Posted January 12, 2007 (edited) Maybe they feel that their own manhood has less germs than the taps in a public toilet, which after all are touched by people who've just done a sh*te? I'v never seen a guy manage to do a piss without touching his manhood but iam sure you can do a sh*ite without touching your ar se,or may be you can do a piss without touching your manhood.. Answers on a postcard!!.... Edited January 12, 2007 by Larsson. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Peterhead Dave Posted January 12, 2007 Share Posted January 12, 2007 The taps have also been touched by other guys who've just touched their own manhood... 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Larsson. Posted January 12, 2007 Share Posted January 12, 2007 (edited) The taps have also been touched by other guys who've just touched their own manhood......I carry baby wipes..But what they should do is install automatic doors in all public loo's then you would'nt have to touch the door after some pishy..or shity handed bloke. Edited January 12, 2007 by Larsson. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest xbasslichtie Posted January 12, 2007 Share Posted January 12, 2007 I'v never seen a guy manage to do a piss without touching his manhood but iamsure you can do a sh*ite without touching your ar se,or may be you can do a piss without touching your manhood.. Answers on a postcard!!.... It is in fact possible to do a pish without touching your manhood - not done it myself, but I know people that can. Furthermore, unless you pish on your hands, why does your manhood have more germs on it than require being washed off? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gaz Posted January 12, 2007 Share Posted January 12, 2007 Let's be honest, it's impossible to get your hands germ-free in a public toilet. You turn a tap on with dirty hands, a tap that's already been touched by other folk with dirty hands. You use whatever p*shy soap they give you, wash your hands as best as you can and then turn the tap off with wet hands, picking up all the germs again you've just got rid of. You've then got the choice of a paper towel (clean-ish) or one of those blowers that just blow the germs everywhere. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
An Sionnach Posted January 12, 2007 Share Posted January 12, 2007 This weather. Just back from a meeting across the road and it's blowing a gale and pishing down! It's so bad they had to load the Emirates flight one at a time as the wind was rocking the plane up and down about 12 inches! And it's a feck-off big Boeing 777! 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Half A Person Posted January 12, 2007 Share Posted January 12, 2007 Let's be honest, it's impossible to get your hands germ-free in a public toilet.You turn a tap on with dirty hands, a tap that's already been touched by other folk with dirty hands. You use whatever p*shy soap they give you, wash your hands as best as you can and then turn the tap off with wet hands, picking up all the germs again you've just got rid of. You've then got the choice of a paper towel (clean-ish) or one of those blowers that just blow the germs everywhere. You turn the taps on with your bare hands (they're already dirty) and then wash them using soap . Leave the tap running and then go to dry your hands using a paper towel. Don't discard the paper towel; instead use it to turn off the tap, ensuring you don't touch the tap with your bare hands. Kick the toilet door open to leave. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gaz Posted January 12, 2007 Share Posted January 12, 2007 You turn the taps on with your bare hands (they're already dirty) and then wash them using soap . Leave the tap running and then go to dry your hands using a paper towel. Don't discard the paper towel; instead use it to turn off the tap, ensuring you don't touch the tap with your bare hands. Kick the toilet door open to leave. Genius! You, sir, have clearly spent a great deal of time thinking about this! What if you need to pull the door towards you to open it though, so kicking it won't work? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest xbasslichtie Posted January 12, 2007 Share Posted January 12, 2007 You turn the taps on with your bare hands (they're already dirty) and then wash them using soap . Leave the tap running and then go to dry your hands using a paper towel. Don't discard the paper towel; instead use it to turn off the tap, ensuring you don't touch the tap with your bare hands. Kick the toilet door open to leave. Unless of course you have to pull the door open to leave...in which case I imagine you have to stand looking despondent and slightly creepy waiting for someone to come in....then make a dash for it. Am I right? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Half A Person Posted January 12, 2007 Share Posted January 12, 2007 Genius! You, sir, have clearly spent a great deal of time thinking about this!What if you need to pull the door towards you to open it though, so kicking it won't work? Errr...wait for someone else to come in? Hopefully George Michael will be in the area so you won't have to wait too long before he feels like some 'Fastlove'. Dart out as he enters. Or use your elbows in that awkward way like when you've got loads of shopping and you're trying to open your front door and your keys are in your mouth and you're really really hoping no-one is watching you because you're dropping stuff all over the place. Or is that just me that does that? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Baggio Posted January 12, 2007 Share Posted January 12, 2007 use the paper towel that you used on the tap? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kullibino Posted January 12, 2007 Share Posted January 12, 2007 Use a 2nd paper towel. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Half A Person Posted January 12, 2007 Share Posted January 12, 2007 use the paper towel that you used on the tap? Hmm that sounds too sensible. I'd prefer to take my chances with the George Michael option. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ShakehandsTom - DFC Posted January 12, 2007 Share Posted January 12, 2007 Quote Codfish: That's nothing. In work this week, I've been called Andrew (correct), Drew (suppose, although never been called it before), Alan (there's an Alan in my team), Michael ( ) and Edward! There's an obvious answer to this problem... Just wear your St. Mirren shirt to work. Then ther'd be no confusion over your 'name'. Number 7: Coddy. B) That'd stop them calling you Edward and the likes. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ayrgirl Posted January 12, 2007 Share Posted January 12, 2007 You turn the taps on with your bare hands (they're already dirty) and then wash them using soap . Leave the tap running and then go to dry your hands using a paper towel. Don't discard the paper towel; instead use it to turn off the tap, ensuring you don't touch the tap with your bare hands. Kick the toilet door open to leave. What he said....that's what they tell you at all infection control lectures. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest XaaronPrimus Posted January 12, 2007 Share Posted January 12, 2007 In response to all the peeps talking about hand washing in Pubs etc.. The Government says wash your hands! 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ICTChris Posted January 12, 2007 Share Posted January 12, 2007 What is this HowardHughes.com? personally I just piss all over my hands, the floor, the toilet seat, the door handle, the sink, the paper towels, the mirrors and anyone else in the toilet with me. best option. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
codfish Posted January 12, 2007 Share Posted January 12, 2007 Quote Codfish: That's nothing. In work this week, I've been called Andrew (correct), Drew (suppose, although never been called it before), Alan (there's an Alan in my team), Michael ( ) and Edward! There's an obvious answer to this problem... Just wear your St. Mirren shirt to work. Then ther'd be no confusion over your 'name'. Number 7: Coddy. B) That'd stop them calling you Edward and the likes. Funny you should mention that - I was called Codfish today! One of my colleagues happens to be a Saints fan, and posts on our official forum! 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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