Estragon

Middlesbrough, County Tyrone?

I can't see him lining up against Rangers in a couple of weeks time.

Rattled Dundee supporter highlights that a Kilmarnock centre forward wants our main title challenger to spunk a huge wage on an ageing duffer and you want us to be upset? What a totally desperate attempt.

That's him. Scored against QoS on our way to the 2012 league cup. Not much else tbh.

Would walk into your current team. Hard to say who the biggest diddies ever to show up at RP were. Probably one of the anonymous haddies that we signed under Lee Clark. It'sa weird experience going to watch your team, and being unable to recognise five or six of the players - but that was genuinely what the latter part of 2016 was like at Kilmarnock. I probably still couldn't identify half of those boys from photographs.

My bottle has completely crashed here boys, nearly in tears before the fucking thing had even started the day. What a fucking team.

Hope you lads enjoy the celebrations tonight

I cooked Xmas dinner for 18 yesterday, and if you'd have dropped this pearl to me on discovering it was fucked my backup plan would have been you.

Please show your workings.

The axe has fallen Cammy, what have you done?! ...if there's a new account opened called Cammy32...

You're my Christmas hero.

This is exactly how you end up with flat earthers on radio 4. Nobody's entitled to an unqualified opinion, and anecdote isn't evidence.

f**k this. I did my years of humility when we were shit, and when we're back to shit I'll consider it. Until then I'm intending to swan about this bitch like Rick James.

No! I'm absolutely RAGIN' about this totally innocuous article! Don't tell me how to live dammit!

We're going to need a bigger boat...

No, last time we got pumped we then just immediately battered you lot and went top of the league again.

Do you really think that's what this is? Or do you think it's a vain attempt to use our club as a tenuous opportunity to trumpet the historic achievements of a retired English footballer? There's nothing in this article that talks about how good the league is this year, there's nothing in it that talks about how good the football at RP is, or at Parkhead is, or at Ibrox, or Pittodrie, or in Edinburgh earlier in the season... In fact, the only mention of the Scottish game in this article is where he says of Clarke's time at WBA that "sometimes success has to be put into context", if anything that talks DOWN our game, not up. And in any case, I'm not sure The National enjoys a great circulation down south, where the vast majority of investment originates.

If theres one thing that irks me about the Scottish psyche it's the constant need to be patted on the head by our Southern neighbours. As if anyone cares about what Joe Cole has to say about a club he'd never heard of a year ago. Get that deleted.

Hope you enjoyed it....

I think you're probably being a bit literal. There can't have been so many Aberdeen fans in Gothenburg for instance - but so long as one was actively emotionally engaged in it I'd say that counts.

Still silent on the number of major trophies you've seen your team lift I take it? The biggest thing I've known Dundee to do is relegate their more significant city rivals. Pathetic really.

Seeing the highlights again last night I'm less sure about our penalty claims. Definite tug on Brophy, although arguably not quite enough. I can't decide whether the foul on Jones is inside or outside the box - should have been awarded either way, then there's a discussion about what colour it is. Also, a bit of absolution for Broadfoot and Kusunga. Two extremely difficult balls to deal with, both guaranteed goals if left - although perhaps Bachmann might have dealt with the former? In better weather I think that both Brophy and Stewart score their one on ones, and we can't lose anyone in the box like we did with Miller early on. All in all reasonably positive. Three points, and on to Accies.

I never said that I didn't care about laughing at your shitey team, just that I didn't care ENOUGH to get into some weird quasi-social interaction with you. Sorry, I really thought I'd made that quite clear. Not biting, just want to see your team relegated without having to stake a tenner for cats with ptsd on it. Is that OK, or are you going to keep being awkward?

Or speaking to a Dundee fan about anything that's happened since JFK was assassinated? With ye.

Dees comparing being top after an opening day pumping with being consistently about the best team in Scotland for an entire calendar year. A new lowlight.