BFTD

Yeah, but think about how many times you've seen people drop litter right next to a bin. Some folk just seem to take prompts to thoughtful behaviour as a challenge. And if you're injecting smack, I doubt community safety is high on your list of priorities

It's kinda fun if you like Sam Raimi's films in general. But a massive waste of Venom. Think they probably overstretched with the CG. I vaguely remember that the giant Sandman bits look a bit blurry. But I thought the acclaimed CG in the second film was quite poor, in that Spidey and Doc Ock moved very strangely in the fight scenes. It helps if you're a video game player, I think - I've spent thirty years overlooking less-than-photorealistic visuals

Just did the shopping, and I was genuinely stunned to see that the Christmas puddings are out, to the point that I had to spend a few seconds working out what month it was in my head. I'm not complaining, I'm just amazed at how feeble my brain is these days On the plus side, the mini-stollen are back in at Lidl. Thinking of changing my username to 'BigMorbidlyObeseTabbyDave'.

I'm guessing the bin guys expect (and find) needles in pretty much everything, so you still get good guy points. Hopefully the wife was suitably appreciative. Can I have your share of the heroin if my appendix bursts again?

Jeebus - I'd have thought a kangaroo would take the car out too Are they tasty? We had some Kangaroo steaks a while back ("farmed in Germany ), but I can't remember a thing about them. And I'm guessing that Teutonic Roo wouldn't be a patch on something cooked up by a tough, burly backpacker murderer denizen of the magnificent Antipodes.

Was it you that posted something about seeing dozens of dead kangaroos on a stretch of road? Are you, in fact, the infamous marsupial murderer of Adelaide?

Fucking hell I get the impression that they had me laid out like yon laddie with the flip-top head from the old toothbrush ads. Kinda glad they didn't give me the option to be awake for that. Although I'm feeling more and more violated as this conversation continues.

Incidentally, when my wife first saw a needle deposit box in a disabled toilet, her response was to express surprise that there are that many diabetics among us. Bless.

Top boy. Now, to combat that crippling heroin addiction... Our thoughts are with your family at this difficult time. #prayforzenny

b*****ds/Les Salauds - Parisian returns home after his sister's husband dies, and attempts to find out who perpetrated a vicious sexual assault on his niece. I'll be honest - I don't have a fucking clue what was going on in this film. It seemed to jump around quite a bit, and both myself and the wife felt quite dim for being unable to follow it. My best interpretation is that it's a French version of Get Carter, if Michael Caine had shrugged a lot and done practically nothing, except shag the bad guy's wife. Entirely possible I missed some brilliance here, but I found it all a little tedious. Thanks to christophe for the...recommendation, I guess? Didn't notice any actual corn penetration though, only the bloody aftermath

Man-flu can only be diagnosed by a suitably condescending maw/girlfriend/gaggle of bints on Facebook. Please confirm, as the symptoms are similar to that of Ebola.

Uh-oh - bad news, Throbs: it's probably an STD Doesn't explain why they're on your ringpiece, however. Maybe someone else can give some suggestions?

Get the wife to burn them off with the iron. If it doesn't work, at least you'll have an amusing anecdote to tell your grandkids. You sure they're warts and not piles?

Yeah, it's horrible, you have my sympathies. I was curled up in a ball in a darkened room for most of the week after. Didn't help that every available space in my head, neck, and chest was full of congealed blood. My throat was more painful than my mouth; just breathing was a nightmare. Starting to wonder what they did to me while I was unconscious, actually

I'm with you, but it'll never happen because all the "psychics" have to do is ask why religion isn't being criminalised, and that's a can of worms that nobody wants to open.

Pros self-catheter. Amateurs get the wife to help. I have some experience in this; happy to help. You're officially a pervert if you enjoy it, mind

Bloody Mary - a group of psychiatric nurses invoke a murderous spirit by chanting her name into a mirror in the hospital basement. Silly and nonsensical tosh that looks like a student movie. Difficult to sit through. Not even a fair smattering of tits (they have to be naked when chanting, don'tchaknow) could improve the interest levels. Seems like Amazon Instant Video contains nothing but this type of cack these days.

That's the most discomfort I've ever had - wisdom tooth removal is horrible. Could hardly get out of bed for a week afterwards. Still, cut down on the headaches in the long run.

To be fair, they can still be cousins despite being married, or related in other ways. I believe it's traditional to invoke the spectre of Fife at the point?

Succinct and accurate. I had to endure this in the cinema - the sole bright spot was that there's a scene where Harrison Ford has a bit of food at the corner of his mouth that keeps appearing and disappearing. His character isn't eating at the time.

Very confused. The Dingles were a horrific 'comic' band of fail when last I saw Emmerdale, the arrival of whom killed interest I still had. Did they draft in a different, 'hard' branch of the family or something?

The wife's started getting emails from her family in the US about how Scotland will become some kind of racist backwater without the rest of the UK to keep us in check. The impression I get is that they're trying to get her to move away before independence hits. Absolutely fucking livid right now. Edit: Apparently Jews living in Scotland are in fear of their lives right now due to support for Palestinian civilians during the recent conflict in Israel. Kristalnacht mk. II set to kick in on September 19th. Raging so hard that this may be my last post due to HNNGGG

Forgot about that. Plus, it cost a fortune, whereas Crossroads was put together from cardboard and sticky-back plastic (and that was just the actors). Eldorado the clear winner.

As has been mentioned, it's utter keich, or was when last viewed (Christ, more than a decade ago). Emmerdale Farm was just dull, and was a great pre-bedtime sedative as a youngster Now, Crossroads - that was a REAL horror show.

Ah, pants. The wife wants to see this for some reason, and I was hoping it might be quite good.